Q&A: Disillusioned about Law of Attraction

July 4, 2015 | 87 Comments »

disillusioned by law of attractionEvery once in a while I get a question that feels right to post here for a couple of reasons:

1 – you can do a better job answering it
2 – others will benefit from the discussion
3 – several are asking the same question

Today’s question satisfies all three reasons for asking your input.

Here it is in the words of the person who asked it most recently:

I hope it’s okay to ask this question, because I’m starting to feel disillusioned about the whole manifesting thing.

The things I try to manifest don’t work. And the things I don’t even try to create do happen.

(I was pray rain journaling for a new boyfriend, and got a surprise tax refund instead. Then I set an intention for a good doctor’s appointment, which didn’t turn out well at all; and instead manifested a promotion at work which I wasn’t even trying to get and am not really sure I want.)

What does that say about law of attraction? I’m getting things I’m not even focusing on and while they’re cool things, they aren’t what I’d like to be manifesting.

It’s in your hands now, Good Vibers.

What say you to our LOA-disillusioned friend?

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87 Responses to “ Q&A: Disillusioned about Law of Attraction ”

  1. Jeannette says:

    I’ve often heard manifestors report that the stuff they don’t care about that much happens really easily and without much (if any) effort, while the things that matter most are slooooow to come.

    I suspect that’s because of the “charge” we have on the stuff that feels important or that we really want. But I’m not entirely sure that’s all that’s going on in this particular situation.

    What do you guys think?

  2. Elle says:

    Sounds to me like you ARE manifesting and LOA is indeed working. This happens to me and to everybody.

    Do not focus on the things you want. Just let them go. Pay no attention to them whatsoever and do other things. Keep living your life. Just want the overall best things possible and they do eventually happen, most likely not the way you originally intended or had in mind. Keep feeling good and acknowledging the stuff given. And always be grateful and appreciative.

    Of course, other super-creators will add to this much more eloquently than I, but just to get the ball rolling, these are my 2 cents.

    • Jeannette says:

      Elle, I agree with your “letting go” instruction and know a lot of manifestors find that as a challenging instruction when they’re told to focus on what they want, and also to let it go.

      But I don’t think that instruction is as contradictory as it might sound. I like how you suggest feeling good and being open to how the best things will unfold.

      Thanks for chiming in on this one, Elle!

  3. anonymous says:

    I have this same question, too! Things that I don’t really care about or think about manifest effortlessly and quicjly, while my deepest desires I’ve had for a long time still aren’t here. And I’ve done so much around them, like shifting limiting beliefs, releasing and allowing, pray rain, scripting, visualization, etc. Sometimes I feel like it’s not worth it to follow LOA anymore.

    • Jeannette says:

      Okay, anonymous, I think that’s exactly why Communion of Light tells us to “give up early and often.” Because a lot of times we’re trying too hard to get there. Lord knows I’ve done this routine myself!

      But needing it less and loving life now helps me clean up the energy around the desire, and every time I’m able to accomplish that I see movement forward again. 🙂

      And sometimes the easiest way to get there is to just throw in the towel altogether, if we’ve been particularly frustrated for a while. I’d love to get others’ take on this, too …

      • Elle says:

        Yes, Jeannette. This is what I have experienced as well! When I give up, not care about that family and friends think of me or my tasks at hand, or whatever, when I literally say “Whatever” and mean it, that is, feel it to the core, then viola!

      • anonymous says:

        Hi Jeannette,
        I just wanted to add something to my first comment – I’m not sure if anyone else has experienced this, but what has really (I think) negatively affected me with LOA is when teachers say there is no destiny or fate. Before I found out about deliberate creation, I always believed that I was just lucky and that great things would come to me and that I would get everything I wanted. I never felt pressured to force action towards certain goals and just trusted that they would happen at the perfect time, something that I wasn’t in control of or had to make happen. I flowed with life more and knew that I was always moving towards the things I deeply wanted. I never worried about if I have limiting beliefs or some hidden resistance blocking me. I trusted and relaxed so much more! Really lived in a state of “letting go”. Many people interpret destiny as something negative or limiting, but I always felt it very empowering since I knew I would get everything I wanted without having to plan or force myself to do anything. Since I’ve learned that we are completely in control…I’ve felt really stressed and worried that I might not get the things I want because of some vibrational kinks or not taking enough responsibility and action. Before, I never had this issue. Does anyone else relate to this?

        • Jas says:

          I relate to that (although from a variety of teachers in the field of self help)! You have said it clearly and my experience is the same. I used to feel a lot of faith and trust and knew that diving timing was in the mix. In the meanwhile, I lived my life and did what I felt compelled to do.

          Now, I find all that I’ve learned about how to “make things happen” has put me in my mind instead of keeping me in my heart, and things have become far more challenging. Thanks for sharing. Makes me consider that it may be time for a major letting go of the “learned” way and return to the trust that seemed inherent.

        • Natasha says:

          I have found this too, and I think it’s because there were differences in when I was working from ego will vs. divine will. (Note: divine will doesn’t mean some external God deciding what happens to you in life – it’s still you, just the higher/larger part of you.)

          When I was a kid, I did whatever made me happy, and had this natural belief that I was powerful. And I was super creative, great at school cus I truly enjoyed learning, etc. Then when I graduated from college and had to face the real world, I went into panic mode and tried to overanalyse everything. How should my career go in order to have a viable income? What exact income should I try to manifest? What exact record label should I pick for me? How many exact Facebook fans should I visualise? All of it was ego-based. I didn’t even care about the kind of music I wanted to make anymore, I wanted to do whatever brought me external success.

          Now I’ve realised that when you work from your ego will, you only ever have the power of the ego. (And you might get what you want, but you’ll likely find it doesn’t make you happy.) But when you align with divine will and follow your joy, you have the power that creates worlds! And aligning with divine will means truly letting go and trusting. Not trying to control everything, because you know what? You just can’t see the bigger picture.

          So in times where I feel like the LOA isn’t working anymore, I take a step back and “go general”, and trust the Universe will bring me back on track. The BEST things have happened to me through being open to other possibilities. The larger part of me knows what I want much more than my ego thinks it does! 🙂

        • IMHO, this is really awesome because you are seeing what your specific method of intentional manifestation is. Each of us are already master manifestors. As the Communion of Light says (repeatedly), if this was not the case we would all have starved long ago.

          I relate to your dilemma but also want to say that this “phase” passes as you begin to give your own inner voice more credence than any teacher or ghost.

          I really do see in my own life that what is happening, more than anything, as life keeps getting better in very general and specific ways is that I am actually remembering what I already know and that which well-meaning cultural conditioning has tried to cover up for some very good reasons.

          So, hooray for this realization! This may very well be the beginning of something quite delicious!

          Oh, and PS, worrying about blocks or hidden beliefs is something I used to practice in abundance. And, having spent a fair amount of time in my own “subconscious mind,” I can report that it is a servant, not a master, and that reports of big, bad beliefs lurking just waiting to pounce is the modern equivalent of “the Devil made me do it.” Just my opinion, of course, as it relates to anyone but myself.

      • anonymous says:

        “But needing it less and loving life now helps me clean up the energy around the desire, and every time I’m able to accomplish that I see movement forward again. 🙂

        And sometimes the easiest way to get there is to just throw in the towel altogether, if we’ve been particularly frustrated for a while.”

        This resonates with me really strongly. 🙂 recently I came across one of your posts about seeing everything that happens, even seemingly negative things, in a positive way and that only good could result. That really reminded me of some old supportive beliefs that like everything happens for a reason, I am in the exact perfect place on my path, everything is going according to my higher self’s plan and is coming together perfectly.

      • Anonymous says:

        It’s nice when we can make (and sometimes any) things happen without falling out the yin-yang.

  4. Kitty T says:

    Wondered about that myself in the beginning, now I know if I really want it, I’d better let it go! LOL!

    Definitely the strangle hold I used to use didn’t work well.

    Think its important to experiment with LOA and find what works for you. Its definitely not a one size fits all program.

    Letting go and just going for the next good feeling thought has worked wonders in my life.

    Thanks Jeannette for this question.

    • Monique says:

      Sounds like she is an awesome manifestor! I’m going through a similar thing so I’m trying to get super busy thinking about other things doing other things dreaming about other things and loving what is.
      The last part is very fun because it feels so good.
      But scary cause I’m loving things as they are! What to do? I’m enjoying the good feelings as much as I can and as often as I can.

      • Jeannette says:

        Right on! Finding what feels better is always a good plan, Monique. Kudos to you for being willing to “love what is” because (believe it or not) a lot of folks are nervous that if they do that, then things won’t change.

        It’s a powerful practice, though! Thanks for your reply to our reader’s question. 🙂

    • Jeannette says:

      Kitty, I love how you describe it as the “strangle hold.” I know that move. lol

      And yay for the suggestion to experiment! I agree that that’s a great way for us to find our personal sweet spot on what we’re manifesting. Thanks for adding to the conversation here, Kitty. 🙂

  5. Quilly says:

    Maybe the Universe just wants to have fun.
    Awhile back I playfully “intended” something, almost in an off-hand manner, and BOOM I got results immediately.
    Perhaps it’s just MY Universe that responds this way, but it’s been my experience that if I approach something in dead seriousness, the intention suddenly takes on the dirgelike vibe of a funeral. And it’s obvious nothing spectacular and splendiferous is going to come of that.
    So I say, set it, forget it, and don’t fret about it. Play some music, dance, kiss someone — and tell the Universe how much you are in love with it … 🙂

    • Jeannette says:

      Quilly, that’s exactly where all my favorite manifesting stories came from, too. Playful, light, experiment, no agenda or expectations – just light, easy energy.

      Having said that, it makes me think of some of the stories we’ve reported in GVU forums about how well it works to get feisty and a little demanding. Like that “I mean it” energy has some power in it, too.

      I’d say, though, that the “didn’t try too hard” successes outnumber the “got serious with Universe” success stories by about ten to one. lol So I agree with your tip to turn on the music, dance to it and kiss someone. Thanks for that, Quilly! 🙂

      • Elle says:

        So, basically, the “method” of not banging on the door hard enough to knock it down or wake everyone up, but gentle knocking, as long as we keep feeling good at it and be chill about it, will eventually make the door open, or open a window, right?

        • Quilly says:

          Or maybe just telling the door that you are really excited about seeing what’s inside? 😉

    • Angelli says:

      Love that. Dirge like and funereal are good descriptions for “seriously intending”. So far the things that have manifested for me have always been thoughts that were deeply true that I couldn’t have seriously even expressed them. Like knowing without resistance this or that thing.

      I think the “seriously intending” bit really just comes when we have work to apply to whatever is present, and that may be very much not what we thought would be in the here and now. Though as it turns out it may be the very thing that wants your attention (for now).

  6. Jesann says:

    Could also be that the asker is putting out “I don’t have it” energy whenever he/she tries to manifest those things. I know that’s a big one for me.

    • Jeannette says:

      That’s what I was wondering myself, Jesann – how strong the story (stories) are flowing that ‘this doesn’t work’ or ‘I don’t get what I really want.’ If those thoughts were getting a fair amount of air time, then this IS a successful manifestation. Albeit not a desired one.

  7. Brian says:

    ”I’m starting to feel disillusioned about the whole manifesting thing.”

    The only reason you would feel that way is if you are doing the vibrational work to get your stuff, rather than to feel better.

    The only reason anyone wants anything is because they believe they will feel better in the having of it. So, since the only reason you want anything is so that you can feel better, and you can focus your thoughts and feel better, and feel good now, regardless of the conditions in your life, then there is no awareness of the lack of your stuff or feeling disillusioned because you are very aware of how good you feel right now.

    ”The things I try to manifest don’t work.”

    The reason you’re manifesting them is so that you can feel better. And when you focus on feeling better now, then you do not feel or notice the physical absence of what you want, because you are focused on and feel the vibrational presence (which feels good) of what you want.

    ”And the things I don’t even try to create do happen.”

    It’s because when you try to manifest what you want, you are more aware of the lack or absence of having it than you are of feeling good. You’re doing this vibrational work to get your stuff, instead of to feel better, and so you introduce resistance.

    Every subject is really two subjects: What is wanted and the lack of it. And you know which you are focused on by how you feel. When you feel good, you are focusing on what you want. When you do not feel good, you are focused on the lack or absence of what you want.

    When you don’t try to create other things, you do not think about them. And when there’s no thought, there’s no resistant thought. And, with no resistance, you allow it to manifest easily.

    Your only work is to lower your level of resistance. And, you lower resistance by focusing on thoughts that help you feel better, and feel good. You want to give less attention to what is and taking negative score, and give more attention to how you want to feel.

    “I’m getting things I’m not even focusing on.”

    To rephrase that to more accurately put it:

    “I’m getting things I’m not even offering resistance to receiving.”

    Let’s clear this one thing up, and I’ll just say it bluntly:

    You don’t have to think about what you want to manifest it.

    Here’s a quote from Abraham:

    “Do ya know: You could give birth to an idea, never think about it again, and it would come to full fruition.”

    – Abraham, Stamford, CT, May 16, 2015

  8. Jen C. says:

    I love this thread, and to sum it up, I would only say, “you get what you believe”. So, it’s good to clear it all up, be really general. And, YES, this wonderful being is manifesting GREAT things, so keep up with the fun of it, the ease of it, and don’t get caught up in what’s not working. It IS working well, with perfect timing.

  9. The Universe gives and it takes according to the will of the Universe, which BTW is you. Rumi said Thinkest thyself a puny form when within thee the Universe is enfolded?

    We spend entirely too much time wondering why we didn’t get something we wanted, instead of wondering why we got something at all.

    Just my thoughts.

    • Jeannette says:

      Great quote, Dr. Ian! And I love your suggestion to switch focus over to what IS working. That in itself would make all the difference.

  10. Shimimax says:

    Oh my! The universe is showing you avenues of success and abundance you haven’t even considered. And giving you an example of how easy it is when you just allow. Follow its inspiration and example and Let it go.

  11. Juliette says:

    For me it’s a Universe timing thing. Some things I get right away, and some things take 20 years. It doesn’t matter if I focus on it, don’t focus on it, feel good, feel like crap, hold on, let go… none of that seems to matter. If what I want is in alignment with what the Universe wants and is prepared to give, it’s here within anywhere from a few hours to two weeks. If it’s not in alignment with the Universe, it could take 20 years.

    In my experience, the manifestations that take time are often much more rewarding when that time is allowed. For example, it took me 20 years to manifest my dream job, but once I got it I could see how those 20 years contributed to my ability to perform at my current level of success. I would not have been anywhere near as successful if the goal had been achieved before it was.

    Another manifestation happened 16 years after I asked for it. However, when I finally got it, it was packaged with a top international distinction, and an all-expense paid trip to Kuala Lumpur, Malaysia. I would not have received those privileges if I had received it any time other than when I did.

    The relationship I want to manifest is taking FOREVER, but if the other two long-term manifestations were worth the wait, then I expect this one will be too. In the meantime, I’m doing some releasing exercises, extreme self-care, and pray rain journal to pass the time.

    Also, for me, I can always link my manifestations to ONE thought, and one thought only. Sometimes I’ll visualize, write it down, or have a mantra, but those things are more to fill space than anything else. It’s usually just one, deeply felt thought that does the trick.

  12. kelli says:

    Hey there
    I have been reading your blog and getting your newsletter but I don’t think I have ever commented. Love your stuff!

    I am a fellow LOA blogger and coach. I do agree about the charge for sure because naturally that represents resistance…we tend to have a harder time just allowing for things we have deemed really important to us and strongly believe are necessary to be happy.

    There is one other thing I would say that always seems to resonate with people when I discuss it. Making LOA ‘work’ in our favor is something that must be accomplished on the level of feeling. We tend to turn it into an intellectual exercise and we can become obsessed with finding the perfect ‘tool’ and lamenting no program or whatever ‘works.’

    Because we are so oriented towards action, there is a part of us that believes it is this devotion to exercises, affirmations and the like that will bring us what we want. We are acting, and we expect a result from taking that action. But if nothing is really, truly shifting on the level of emotion, nothing is going to change. All the ‘work’ we do is helpful in that it gives us a means to focus positively on what we want, but they are just means to an end.

    Hope that helps some!

    • Aloha says:

      Yes I agree Kelli, we spend so much energy getting good at Loa, imagine if we just believed we didn’t have to ‘do/be’ anything special to manifest our desire. Imagine if we just believed we could manifest just as we are right now!

    • Jeannette says:

      Amen to this, Kelli: “We are acting, and we expect a result from taking that action. But if nothing is really, truly shifting on the level of emotion, nothing is going to change.”

      It took me a while to understand (and practice) that myself – but what a game-changer once we do! Thanks so much for chiming in. I’m tracking down your blog now! 🙂

      • kelli says:

        Yeah me too….I think that is something that most of us struggle with to various degrees no matter how ‘advanced’ our understanding is.

  13. Lauren says:

    Someone may have already said this, but here’s my 2 cents!

    This might have more to do with perspective than it does to do with the specific “things” that haven’t arrived in your experience yet. For example, I keep a running tally of things that I want to happen in my life, and they include but are not limited to – wonderful health, happiness and joy, business success, confidence, great relationships with others, etc. Basically, if something good happens, it would not occur to me that I had not intended it to happen to me because I AM intending all of the good to happen to me.

    And the problem with noticing that things you say you don’t REALLY want are manifesting quickly while others are taking longer or not manifesting at all is that by default, you are going to experience more of that by focusing your attention on the lack of it. What I would try to do in this situation is really look at these great things that have happened that perhaps weren’t at the top of the priority list and say “Look how great these manifestations are..I had barely thought of this but have been welcoming all good things into my life and now these great things keep popping up.” The more you notice the things going RIGHT, the more things will appear that are going right. And vice versa.

    Also, you don’t have to really follow LOA for it to work for you so it’s okay if you want to release attachment to the idea of being an LOA practitioner if that doesn’t feel good to you for the time being.

    I’ve found that releasing attachment to things we really want is more challenging than just shifting focus to something else for the time being so that’s my advice: shift your focus to the things that are going right as often as you can and always reach for the best thought that you can. Also, find the thoughts that give you relief if you are feeling bad – those will usually set you on the right path.

    • Jeannette says:

      Lauren, these are such wise words:

      “What I would try to do in this situation is really look at these great things that have happened that perhaps weren’t at the top of the priority list and say ‘Look how great these manifestations are..'”

      You’re so right in that we get more of whatever story we’re telling, so it’s worth making the effort to upgrade it. Even if that upgraded version was to stop thinking about LOA.

      You said it way better than I just tried to summarize though, so thank you so much for chiming in on this one. 🙂

  14. Jacki Whitford says:

    I had to laugh when I read this because the same thing happens to me. When I focus on manifesting abundance, every health issue I have is healed.it is as if every angel and guide in the Universe goes “she’s finally let go of focusing on her health issues so we can fix them”. Sometimes it is weeks before I notice everything is healed.

    So whatever you are focused on intently thst you want resolved must be released at some point to the Universe. And it works best if you let the Universe choose the happy end result so you get back better than you ever dreamed of.

    • Jeannette says:

      “It must be released at some point to Universe.” Hear hear, Jacki! That makes me realize a thing or two of my own that I haven’t quite let go of.

      Really loving this discussion – thanks, everyone, for contributing to it! 🙂

  15. Ena says:

    Hi everyone!

    I agree that things that we’re not focusing on, at all, manifest exactly because we’re not offering any resistance to them.. It’s not true that we didn’t even want them, we did, we just weren’t aware of it.. but our inner being was:)

    When we experience ‘negative’ manifestations, believe it or not, it often is a step on the way to what we DO want… We humans just CANNOT, with our limited minds, see the big picture and realize how this can possibly lead to where we want to be!

    We just need to trust and be patient more! When the circumstances seem to be the worst, that’s when we should show the biggest faith!



    • Jeannette says:

      Yeah, if we could see things from that bigger picture, Ena, that would definitely shift the thoughts we’re thinking. Thanks for the reminder that it may be exactly perfect but that we just can’t see so through the filter of the ‘it’s not working’ story we sometimes tell.

  16. jennifer tilley says:

    I tend to believe that there is really no such thing as a play on words.

    so, when I hear… and have experienced, that it is easier to manifest things that ‘don’t matter’… it seems obvious to me (now, after my own experiences)… that it is because it is easier to manifest ‘spirit’ than ‘matter’ – the spirit of a thing being what we are all going after in the first place… thus easier to mold/manipulate/change/shift/etc…

    if something doesn’t ‘matter’… you haven’t got a vibe about it, one way or the other; but your core vibe could be a perfect match for it. the stuff that does ‘matter’… you’ve already formed a vibe for, and, unless you can see evidence of it already being in your life… you are noticing the gap between you and it, unfortunately.

    I have also found that the things I have wanted to manifest… really wanted… I mean really, really!!! wanted!!… when I finally get to the point where I’ve thrown in the towel on them, choosing my own sanity and well being over it ever happening… well, that’s when the little buggers finally show up! and come in from spirit form… guess that’s because they just didn’t matter anymore 😀

    • Jeannette says:

      Jennifer, that last paragraph of your has me laughing out loud. I so get that!

      Thanks for the comic relief today. 🙂

      • jennifer tilley says:

        thanks, Jeannette 🙂

        keeping it light has also been a great help for me… and, it was you that reminded me of the importance of that in one of your other threads 🙂

  17. Lisa Hillesland says:

    I pretty much gave up on LOA a few months before I found out Jerry Hicks was sick. His death/crossing over, his letter to the public before he died, and the b.s. nonsense people wrote about why he died, just made it worse. Now I just practice appreciation and feeling good because life is way better that way. I also do energy experiments sometimes just for fun (see Pam Grout et al.). My success rate was 10% on one and 50% on another, so I don’t know what to make of that. I still listen to Abraham, Bashar, Seth, and others for fun, and sometimes it helps, but I stop immediately when I get annoyed or frustrated. Abraham says personal experience is the best teacher and to go with what feels better, so I just do that. I love the responses I’m reading here; I think that is why I’m still participating on some level with all of this.

    • I really love what your wrote here Lisa! Nothing is more important than how you feel. Bottom line. Full stop. And there is always a thought that feels better and that is how your intuition is bringing you precisely what you actually want. Powerful stuff!

      • Lisa Hillesland says:

        Thank you, Frank! Your message is very encouraging and soothing, and I love the simplicity of the process you describe.

    • Jeannette says:

      Oh gosh, Lisa, that reminds me my Pam Grout experiments were a big flop. ha I was just going to say I think it’s because I didn’t care enough about them for them to form in reality, but that would fly in the face of the theory that not caring too much is what makes it happen so magically.

      Maybe it’s that there needs to be a certain amount of desire present, but not too much. I do know I’m having much better success with the LOA Treasure Hunt we do at GVU each month, but I think that’s partly because it’s so fun (for me) to co-create with others.

      Whoopsie for the sidetrack … just wanted to say thanks for sharing your thoughts here. I love the responses we’re getting here, too and am happy to be participating with you as well. 🙂

      • Lisa Hillesland says:

        Thank you, Jeannette, for your entertaining and helpful response, and for creating this wonderful dialogue! 🙂

  18. So many great things written here in the comments — another successful Q&A post, once again, Jeannette!

    And this is the one thing I’m really resonating with as I think about it:

    From Paul & The Communion of Light:

    Why is the least useful question to ask.

    Instead, we recommend asking where you want to go from here.

    It never matters how you got here.

    Where you go next, in the form of what thought feels better to you from here, is where all of your power is found.

    And, we understand why “why” seems so important.

    This is what you were taught, and have undoubtedly taught others: that if you understand “why” then you won’t make the same mistake again.

    The only problem with this is the underlying assumption of having made a mistake in the first place.

    You cannot ever answer a question of what you did wrong since that has never actually happened.

    You can, however, take the delicious contrast and bring it forward with you as you make a new decision for what you want and that will guide you through your intuition, found simply in the next better-feeling thought.

    • Jeannette says:

      I SO get that, Frank! Here’s to getting in the habit of asking questions that actually take us where we want to go. Thanks for chiming in with Paul on this one! 🙂

    • Ena says:

      For me the ‘Why’ in fact was really helpful… when the most important things crumbled in my life.. ‘Why’ made me really understand how this game we call Life works.. It made me realize who I really am and why these bad things happened to me, and that I have control over my reality, so it set me free..

  19. Aloha says:

    Thank you everyone!
    Such valuable reminders here and my vibe has sky rocketed from this thread 🙂

  20. Patrice says:

    I think we confuse our role in the process of ‘manifesting”. I get the feeling that most think that they are actually doing the creating when in fact, all things already exist. We are not creating we are CHOOSING. Choosing what experience we’d like to have. The Law of Attraction should really be called the Law of Allowing. You want to allow those things you choose into your life. You don’t need to attract them or create them, they are there.

    The use of the word try tangles things up even further. I took karate for some years as a kid. Our Sensei always said two things over and over, “Can’t means you won’t” and “there is no such thing as TRY you either do it or don’t”. That is so true when you attempt to do something you either do it or you don’t. There is no try about it. Try gives the image of struggle and failure. I would remove that word from your vocabulary ASAP. It’s a useless stumbling block.

    I also think that we confuse the terms RECEIVE and ACCEPT, they are not the same. If the UPS man or woman left a package at your door you have “RECEIVED” a package. It is there, it’s yours. But until you open your door, get the box, open and claim/keep the item(s) inside you’ve not “ACCEPTED” what is yours.

    So, like Abraham says, all those things you want are in your vibrational escrow, you’ve already RECEIVED them just by asking, but until you open up and ACCEPT them they are just sitting on your door step.

    We really make things harder than they are. We just can’t accept how simple things are. We also forget to PAY ATTENTION to things that come to us and realize that somewhere along the line we’ve called these things into being. We’re so busy looking for one thing, to come to us in one way, that we miss so much.

    Mark 8:18 Having eyes do you not see, and having ears do you not hear? And do you not remember?

    You don’t have to be a Christian to be completely bowled over by the wisdom in the New Testament. It’s completely about manifesting and the states of consciousness we assume that either bring about what we want or what we don’t want.

    • Elle says:

      Thank you for this! So, the next question is, how better to accept?

      • Patrice says:

        Yes but FIRST how to recognize your answers. I will give a very mundane example of something I asked and got an answer too. I had to go to Judicial Square in DC for business recently. I intended to catch all trains and not wait around on the metro platform. At Metro Station where most frequently change lines the train I wanted wasn’t there immediately. The timer that lets one know when the next train is coming was way WAY down the platform, I’d need binoculars to see it. I thought to myself, “I wonder how many minutes before the next train”. Right then and I mean within seconds a man on a cell phone passed and he said to the person on the other end, “I should be on time, the next train is in 3 minutes”. I INSTNATNLY got my answer. But if I had been fretting over the train or trying to walk down to where the timer was (not as easy as it sounds DC Metro platforms get very full) or if I was in any other way distracting myself, I would not have still “received” the answer but I would not have heard “accepted” it because I would have been looking elsewhere or “resisting”. So when we expect our desires to come at a certain time or dressed in a certain “package” we often miss them, leaving them unopened on the doorstep of life. Be open to how the universe sends your order. For it truly knows the fastest and best way for us to deliver. Universe always works in Priority mode, but many times we’re not home to answer the door and sign for the package (not paying attention). One of my favorite thoughts when I get up in the morning is, ‘Thank you Universe for always loving & supporting me. I accept all of the gifts you have to offer me with an open and grateful heart”. I only say it once. I don’t go over and over in my head because I know the Universe hears me. When you order something at a restaurant you don’t say to the waiter/waitress, I will have eggs and bacon, I will have eggs and bacon, I will have eggs and bacon…. they would never get your order in if you kept them at your table the entire time. You keep yourself from your own good doing that. Just once, the Universe hears you just like we all hear each other. Let it do its job and lets us do ours by being open and receptive to the gifts and answers that the Universe is constantly pouring into our lives.

        • Patrice says:

          if I was in any other way distracting myself, I would (not) have still “received” the answer but I would not have heard “accepted” it because I would have been looking elsewhere or “resisting.

          *Remove the first not. I meant I would have still received the answer but NOT heard!!

        • Elle says:

          Thank you so much for the very useful example!

          These communications from the Universe, i.e., the answers we receive, are all very personal, individual. What may be a sign to one person may not be to another, although both may agree it is a communication of both are on the same page. That is why it depends on our “radar”, so to speak. We need to be tuned in to the answers with what resonates with us. You can feel it and acknowledge it, of course, when it resonates with you. A little bell goes off inside or something. Most people dismiss these communications as coincidences, but they are not.

          Also, some instances are reflections of where you are vibrating, indicating the need for you to change your vibration. For example, if people are always speaking to you like there is no hope in you getting anywhere, that may be a reflection of the doubts you may have about yourself. When you feel better, you won’t run into these people. Just some more examples.

    • Jacki Whitford says:

      I think we also confuse WANTING with ALLOWING. When we are in a state of wanting, we are in a holding pattern as the Universe believes we just want to linger in that state/emotion. When we are in a state of allowing we have released our request and it is no longer an energy charge holding it in a wanting pattern. Two things I thought about doing this year – going to Paris on vacation and attending a $10,000 coaching course manifested without funds from me in the most unexpected ways. I thought wouldn’t it be nice if I could do both of these things and I let the request go and focused on my day to day routine. That was in February and now I start the course next week and I will be in Paris for Christmas. If someone asked me how did it happen, all I can say is I make my request in a neutral state of mind and let it go to the Universal Manager to be handled. And it was returned in a beautiful way.

      • Elle says:

        How wonderful, Jacki! Thanks for this! The key thing is NEUTRAL. There was no longing, feeling of absence or whining on your part.

        Sometimes, these things get out of hand and we stomp, hem and haw, and release and that is when the magic happens.

    • Jeannette says:

      Patrice, I LOVE this: “I get the feeling that most think that they are actually doing the creating when in fact, all things already exist. We are not creating we are CHOOSING.”

      That so fits with what I’ve heard Bashar say about infinite realities and our access to them.

      Thanks for adding to the conversation here! Much appreciated 🙂

  21. Other than the daily stuff we manifest on auto-pilot, breakfast, our abode, the sky, etc., what we manifest involves four inter-related steps. They are:


    Some things as the original poster mentioned are easy because we are not in resistant to having them. The Communion of Light gives parking spots as a good example. We make the intention, don’t care too much whether we succeed, and then immediately start thinking about what we are going to do after we park. The parking spot appears as if it is the most natural thing in the world, because it is. We are in a high state of allowing.

    But when we try to manifest something we really care about–cash, a partner, or health–we get hung up in how we are going to do it, and we go about it as if it is a problem to solve. We try the formulas, the techniques, the exercises, but usually have little success because in order to solve a problem, we have to create a problem to solve. We then put our attention on the problem. LOA is working, it is just creating based upon the vibration of the problem we have.

    As others have mentioned, there is no formula here. Everyone manifests differently, and each person manifests differently each time they set an intention.

    The common thread is following the thought that feels better–or what feels like relief–not necessarily what feels good. Consistently following what feels better, otherwise known as the path of least resistance, or the downstream thought, or your intuition compass, is what will always help you manifest what you want in the most efficient way possible.

    life Surfer

    • Jeannette says:

      Chip, thanks for the spotlight you gave to this idea: “… there is no formula here. Everyone manifests differently.”

      And thanks also for reminding us that the common thread is to simply engage a better feeling thought.

      Such a pleasure to see you in the comments again – I’ve missed you!!

  22. Rakesh Bhatia says:

    There is some balance needed between ‘Going after it’ and ‘Letting it go’. Hard to reconcile at times, but incredibly important. Probably The single most important factor in improving your conversion rate.

    Where does it say that you cannot enjoy the things you were given ‘free’ i.e. without asking. Considering that nothing is cheaper than free, it could actually be a source of immense joy.

    It may actually be a good idea to use the ‘freebies’ route to get a sort of back-door entry to the stuff that you really want – being intensely happy about the good things that ‘just happened’ may well accelerate the manifestation of things that you really care about (without really caring for those of-course).

    • Jeannette says:

      Ooh, I like that “back door” idea, Rakesh. Brilliant!

      And I agree completely about the balance between going for it and releasing it. Here’s to us allowing our intuitive wisdom to lead the way on whatever serves us best. 🙂

  23. C. says:

    Desire is a strange paradox. It seems like whenever we desire something, that something stays away. However, once we decide to drop that desire and stop chasing it, that desire is suddenly wants and chases us.

    The Law of Attraction is always working, whether we are aware of it or not. We conscious creators have to remember that the Law of Attraction responds to our internal feels/emotions (vibes).

    You say you’re trying to manifest a new boyfriend. When you are in the process of manifestation of this new boyfriend, have you thought about what internal feels/emotions your subconscious is offering? On the conscious plane, you could be saying “I want a new boyfriend” however, on the subconscious plane you could be saying “Yeah, but, what if he ends up being a cheater” or “I’m just not good enough for a new boyfriend”.

    Therefore, sabotaging the manifesting efforts.

    The subconscious is a funny thing. We are blissfully unaware of it, but it does the most work and magic more than what our reality-based conscious plane does. It’s where our true feels and emotions that we have developed over time are stored, are in continuous activation, and that the Law of Attraction/universe responds to.

    One thing I have come to learn with the Law of Attraction is that it doesn’t always work in a direct, rational way. However, our conscious plane refuses to let us accept it. Maybe that tax refund was the universe telling you to go out on a night on the town because that’s where you’re new boyfriend was awaiting. New boyfriend=excitement. Night on the town=excitement.Spending money for fun and pleasure=excitement.

    Ya see how that lines up thanks to the excitement vibe?

    You receiving a job promotion equals higher pay which in return equals feeling good. Therefore, having a higher paid position can result in more available choices for a better doctor you can pay for who can truly make you feel good.

    Once again, can you see how seemingly random things can turn out to be truly connected all along?

    They say truth is stranger than fiction. I dare say the universe is stranger than truth.

    Also, there’s a possibility you could have some hang-ups about doctors in general residing in your subconscious plane.

    I can detail all of this to you because I have been there. I first discovered Law of Attraction in 2012 and I can tell anybody, it wasn’t easy. Heck, there were a few times I threw my hands up and said “This crap isn’t real! Only works for certain folk!” and gave up on it. However, for some reason, I would always come back and start on it all over again. It was almost as if the universe way saying “this is apart of your growth therefore, you need to learn it!” I can honestly I have grown a lot since then and that personal growth is worth more than its weight in gold.

    So don’t feel bad about being delusion. You think you’re not getting it, but you are. In ways you could never imagined. Give it time, it will be revealed.

    • C. says:

      I have some more to add…

      I would also like to state that the Law of Attraction is not a one size fits all” experience. What works for one person may not work for you.

      For myself, when I implement too many Law of Attraction tools, it throws all of my manifestation skills out of whack. It’s like the universe tells me “You’re doing way too much. Keep it simple” and I have to trim all that excess bulk for myself to get back inline and make things happen.

      Also, we sometimes think we really want something, but deep down inside do not want it or need it. I think the Law of Attraction responds to that as well and gives us what we truly need instead.

      I can co-sign other conscious creators who have said that when they let it go and couldn’t careless that’s when magic happens. I’ve always heard my mom speak about how people who just don’t care seem to get all the good stuff.

      I’ve come to learn that the path of least resistance offers the greatest rushing waters flow. It seems to be true for everybody, whether they care or not.

      Note: This doesn’t mean that one turns into a self-absorbed, selfish individual who mistreat people. That’s not what I or other conscious creators mean when we talk about the state of “not caring”. We talk about not caring in the sense that even if we don’t receive that desire we will still be okay, remain in a state of happiness and joy, and not let that desire be a factor in how we live our lives. That’s when the universe really gets excited to manifest for us.

      • Jeannette says:

        Thank you so much, C., and all our other commenters, for devoting such helpful wisdom to this thread. You guys are the best! 🙂

  24. Amber says:

    Great post! The biggest misconception about the law of attraction is people just think all you need to do is visualize and you will get what you want,we all have limiting beliefs that’s like being a chain holding us back from manifesting what we want,we’ve gotten these limiting beliefs when we were young from our parents,friends,relatives ,e.g if you’ve always been told by your parents “money doesnt grow on trees” and that becomes a deep rooted limiting belief ,its going to be hard to visualize and attract money into your life unless you get rid of the limiting beliefs, and i’ve been using this method that gets rid of any limiting beliefs that you may have and start attracting whatever you want here: http://subconciousmindzone.com/2015/06/15/subconscious-mind-tools/

  25. Gary Bodley says:

    Hi Jeannette – This is from Joshua,

    Everything that comes to you is a match to your vibration. Whatever you really want will come to you when and if you allow it. You cannot see the path to the unfolding of all that you want, but if you can get out of your own way, it will come. As you are just learning about the laws of the universe and your ability to create your life, you expect that ability to be fully realized very quickly. But, since you have been creating without deliberate focus for so long, there is much for you to learn and practice.

    You are the creator of your life and your creation is you. That’s all there is to it. When we say your creation is you, the only thing you need to focus on is yourself. What you want comes to you as you emit vibration from who you are being and what you believe. To create the life you want, you must create the version of you who is ready for all that you want. You don’t create by changing the conditions outside of yourself, you create by changing the conditions inside yourself. You create by altering your habits of thought and your system of belief.

    Generally, you resist that which you truly want. You are not really resisting the thing you want, in this case the new boyfriend, instead you are resisting the change that must be made to who you are being. In oder for you to experience the new boyfriend, a new you must emerge. Since the current you does not have a new boyfriend, you will have to change. This means your thoughts and beliefs about relationships, love, intimacy, freedom, etc. will have to become different than they are now.

    The good news is that there is nothing for you to do. The universe knows what you want and how to cause the change that’s necessary to bring about the vibration that will attract the new boyfriend. As long as you do not resist the change, the new boyfriend will emerge into your reality. When you try to make things happen, you believe you know the way to the creation of that which you desire. Since your perspective is limited, you cannot see how it will all unfold. You cannot see the events that will take place for your beliefs to change so that you will start to emit a new vibration. And so you worry that things will not change and this stalls the manifestation.

    When you did not try to make things happen, you allowed them to happen. When you ask, it is given as Abraham would say. That means there is nothing for you to do because there is nothing you can do. The universe will create situations that test your beliefs. In these times you will feel negative emotion. This means you have a belief that is out of alignment with what you want. If you can reduce the intensity of the belief, you will change your vibration in a way that moves you toward what you want.

    While focusing on what you want is good, you often feel the lack of it at the same time. It is more effective to realize that you have a desire, but you are just not quite aligned with the vibration of that desire yet. If you can trust that the universe will naturally bring you into alignment, you can adopt the stance of anticipation and curiosity. Events will unfold that will challenge your belief system. When you feel negative emotion, think about the fear that is at the basis of a negative belief and then work to reduce the intensity of the belief by realizing that it is untrue.

    You are doing better than you think and we believe you are well on your way to allowing everything you want to manifest in your reality.

    We are Joshua.

  26. ramona sun says:

    Everything has a reason, it’s always leading up to something else. Things have to happen in order for other things to happen. Perhaps being promoted at work has something to do with you meeting new people and maybe your significant other will be one of them. Who knows? Always be grateful! ~

    • Jeannette says:

      I like that thought, Ramona – that we might not see how these other things are actually related to the other things we’re desiring. Delightful thought!

  27. Jasmine Blanton says:

    OMG! I THINK I FINALLY GET IT!!! Feel free to read the first paragraph for a thorough analysis ;). But skip to the second paragraph if you want it shorter.

    Like Jeanette and Elle said. You can let go by not focusing on what you want, but focusing on what feels good. Let me try that again. Focus on what feels good not on what you want. I know. I know. Underneath it all, when we feel good it’s because we are focusing on something we want/like but after all the information out there this will keep you on track because the truth is when you’re feeling bad you’re not focusing on what you want, but sometimes it’s hard to tell that you’re focusing on lack or not what you want when you’re convinced that you’re staring/focusing in reality right at the big beautiful car of your dreams. So, how do you stop the confusion. Say, “Hey, do I feel good right now? Am I having fun?” Trust your feelings, not your eyes. You can do it 🙂 So, remind yourself that you’re focusing on it or making the action because it feels good not because it’s what you want or is going to get what you want. I know that you may be well aware that ______________ will definitely get or give you what you want and that’s why you’re doing it, I suggest when you’re speaking to yourself about any type of action or in other words anything you do (thought or physical) that you are doing it because it feels good. That’s it. So, if believing you have a destiny feels good then do it! If it feels good to believe you don’t have a destiny then do it! If no longer speaking or thinking about LOA again makes you feel good then do it! If going to LOA meetings, including talking about how to get what you want, makes you feel good then do it! If going to your friends house complaining about how you don’t understand how to get what you want then do it! It doesn’t have to make sense to you why this or that or that or this makes you feel good when you think it or do it. It just has to feel good when you do. Because, that’s all LOA is teaching us: to do what feels good in every moment, whatever that may be.

    To take out ALL the guess work, we can ask our self: Am I thinking about or doing what is making me feel good right now? If I am, I can answer that question with a quick, solid YES. If not… you know what to do. And don’t say that you don’t! Because you do! 😉 We all know what would make us feel good in the moment or better. And if I have been told once, I have been told a million times by my sister in a loving way (I hope you can feel it now): “You absolutely do know if that thought or action is making you feel good right now.” Feeling good is all that matters. No matter what anyone says or thinks.

    • Jeannette says:

      Jasmine, I got goosebumps reading this:

      “Am I thinking about or doing what is making me feel good right now? If I am, I can answer that question with a quick, solid YES. If not… you know what to do.”

      Love that summation!! Thanks for posting, my friend. 🙂

  28. Saikat says:

    I’d hug her and tell her that I too share her disillusionment. There are several small things that I wanted to manifest that I haven’t been able to but a major one was a relationship. The universe sure has beat that sprightly out of my mind. I haven’t even come close to manifesting that. I used to believe in twin flames and soul mates, now I’ve lost faith in that.

    And on top of it all, I see guys who don’t put in as much work in self improvement, who aren’t as good looking or sometimes even … Nice, with girlfriends. So, I too have lost faith in the law of attraction. I know the standard response I’ll get from the loa world is to Have the blame be put back on me. I’m too damaged in X way, or have these two or three limiting beliefs or my way of thinking or some other thing that’s wrong with me. I went for a long time, thinking there was something wrong with me and that’s why I’m not in a loving relationship. So, I did affirmations, visualisations, etc. to fix my apparently broken self. None of it worked. Then, I realised I’m human and there will always be something wrong with me. All the guys I know that I have girlfriends aren’t perfect either. If anything, they might have more limiting beliefs or whatever since they’re not so conscious.

    So, I wouldn’t tell her anything and just offer her my empathy for her disillusionment. Sometimes, empathy is the best thing you can give … Rather than advice.

  29. Saikat,

    I know it’s a common theme among some LOAers out there to point to people and tell them that what they are manifesting is a result of their thoughts, and it is.

    But, and this is the important part, there is nothing wrong with you. You may me manifesting things you don’t like, but that is only because you are growing. When you do, you outgrow clusters of thoughts that once felt like relief. As you have evolved thoughts that once served you no longer do.

    This is the natural course of things.

    When you decide that you will have what you want, the thoughts that run counter to that vibration will arise and get in your face–and you know this because they feel bad. You don’t have to hunt them down, because if you notice how you feel, they will be obvious. There is nothing broken–no problem to solve.

    The whole idea of fixing yourself is a flawed premise. When you try to solve a problem, you have to identify (create) the problem to solve. But there is no problem, so problem solving only takes your attention off of what you want.

    LOA is still working, it is just creating an endless stream of problems to solve.

    So go easy on yourself. You are not doing anything wrong. Everything you have done up to this point has brought you to the point where you can decide very powerfully, this is what I will have. And you have done this perfectly–right up to the point of manifesting these words from some guy you probably never heard of. You are a master manifestor. You have created everything around you. The way you have gotten to where you are has been nothing short of brilliant. Look back at where you were a year ago. Six months ago.

    Pat yourself on the back. You deserve it.

    Life Surfer

  30. jennifer tilley says:

    after taking a second look at the post, I noticed the word ‘try’ a couple of times.

    ‘try’ implies struggle, effort, etc… don’t try, ever!

    when you know you’ve got it, you don’t have to effort it, ever.

    try falls in line with want for me. kind of like that favorite outfit… I can love it, appreciate it, choose to wear it at times, but I don’t ‘want’ it because I’ve already got it… get it? 🙂

    hope that helped…

    in the words of wayne dyer: you don’t get what you want… you get what you are. (which is pretty encouraging because it’s easier to change ourselves than it is to change solid objects) 🙂

    and, to clear up one other thing I noticed in one of the comments on here… money does grow on trees, despite what a lot of us have been told… it’s made of paper 😀

  31. Creator and Allower says:

    Hey everyone,
    when I made my first visionboard, I noticed that things go well in two areas of my life, the one I have the best vibration in and the one I work the most on.
    What I think is happening is that you put into your vortex a desire to have a boyfriend and a good doctor appointment and also having a lot of money. So then at some point you get happy and you get in alignment and the universe then gives you what’s in your vortex, but you feel resistence to both the appoitment and the boyfriend so the universe gives you the thing you don’t have resistence towards=money. Tax refund, here you go.
    Then this happens again so you get promotion.

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