Downstream With Bullying (Guest Sara Exley)
This originally appeared in the Good Vibe U forums via Coach Sara Exley. Here’s the guest post from LOA Parenting Coach Sara Exley:
I have so many buzzing thoughts, I barely know where to begin.
I’ve been seeing this all over facebook (Ellen DeGeneres video on teen bullying), and I think it’s a fabulous opportunity for us to remember what we know about how deliberate creation really works.
I love that so many people are feeling inspired in the direction of change, and what I also notice (some times) is that it’s easy for us to be loa-minded about money, romantic relationships, health, and plenty of other life-areas, but as soon as kids are brought in the mix, all that we know about LOA seems to go right out the door and we resort back to old ways of responding to both life and our kids.
As deliberate creation-savvy peeps, you know as well I do that putting up a fight against bullying is a sure way to keep it alive in our reality.
We know that the answer is not in getting control over our kids’ behavior (as if that were even possible), tightenting up on consequences, or even keeping an eye out for the unwanted stuff. Life can only show us what we’re watching out for, and if we’re watching out for bullying – Universe is hearing that we’re expecting to see it and will surely deliver on it. (If you think about it, that’s all that’s really happening here.)
So how do we go downstream with something that sucks so bad? The same way we do everything else – lining up with the version of teenagers that we’ve put in our vortex. Vibrationally, teenagers are already there appreciating their differences, celebrating each other, enjoying life, creating life from inside their own vortecies, being inspired examples of love, inspiring others to be more and more authentic, remembering who they are and showing up as that, softening their gap between their contrast and where they want to go. I get thrills just thinking about it!!
Step 1 as far as I can tell is to remember that the way we manifest our experience of our kids is the same as manifesting anything else. Creating what we want in response to the contrast of bullying is as basic as getting clear on what we want, staying focused on our desired vision, looking for evidence of it in as many places as possible, celebrating the evidence we see as we notice it, and celebrating everything else that is going right too. Have a conversation about THAT with your teenagers! Get into YOUR vortex by putting your attention on the rockets of desire you’ve launched! Think about the marvelous version of teen consciousness that is in your vortex just oozing to show up in reality! (Talk about some serious quiff popping!)
And more importantly, see how your desired vision is already happening in reality! If you don’t know what I’m talking about, watch the video below. The newer generations are more ripe for empowering concepts than any generation that has ever come before them.
We are not the bosses of our kids. And the more we seek control over their behavior, the more they are going to show us how absurd we are for trying.
Ellen is right, this is a wake up call, not to get control over our kids, but to get control over what we’re vibrating about them.
Thank you, Sara, for sharing your insightful perspective with us here.