From Contrary to Co-Creation

October 12, 2008 | 17 Comments »

yin-yang-cats.jpgHow does a strong-willed girl go from being dead set against what her boyfriend wants … to carrying out his exact wishes?

Let’s ask Angelina Jolie, who said getting pregnant “never felt like the right thing to do.”

Brad, on the other hand, was very interested in having children of his own. 

After adopting three children over the years, Angelina & Brad gave birth to twins a few months ago.

Have you ever been on the complete opposite side of a hot issue with an important player in your life, like a boss or spouse or police officer?

I know I have.  And I’d like to say I always handle it as well as Brad did, but that would not be entirely accurate.

Here’s what Us Magazine reported about Angelina & Brad’s dilemma:

Staunch adoption advocate Angelina Jolie says she never intended to get pregnant – but beau Brad Pitt helped change her mind.

“I think one of the life changing things that he did, one of many, is that I was absolutely never going to get pregnant. I never felt that it was the right thing to do,” Jolie, 33, says in November’s W. “Now I wouldn’t trade that experience for the world. It taught me a lot about life, just the process of it, and now we have three other beautiful children that wouldn’t otherwise be here.”

After adopting Maddox, Zahara and Pax, “[Brad] stopped talking about having other kids in the other way [by natural birth]. So I suppose in my heart, I realized that he was happy with them as his children, completely,” Jolie says in the interview, as excerpted by Access Hollywood.

“I knew he would never see them as different, and that gave me a certain peace. Then I suppose I just looked at him and loved him and just felt open to [getting pregnant]. I suddenly wanted to. It’s one of those things you can’t explain,” she adds.

Oh, I think perhaps Law of Attraction could explain it, don’t you think? 

Gathering from Angelina’s words, it seems Brad had no resistance and no need for things to be different.  He achieved the peace that Tia and Kim mentioned in the Fries post comments. 

Couple that with a strong desire and … well, welcome to the world Knox and Vivienne!

Let’s hear YOUR cool stories about when you released resistance in a co-creation with someone else and what wonderful things it led to!

PS – the cool yin yang cats are by Aline Gauthier.

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17 Responses to “ From Contrary to Co-Creation ”

  1. Mark Semple says:

    Great thing to notice in the Brad and Angelina story is that it was not either person acquiescing.

    I’m a big fan of win-win, and don’t think a relationship has space for losses.

    For me, the key is to simply be fully present in the moment, clear of anything that does not serve me. No limiting beliefs, no attachment, no resistance, no fears, no resentments. Being your true authentic self is the space that everything else in your life unfolds from.

    You can then be clear on what you want and what is important to you without having any attachment to it.

    My friend, Kassandra, reminds me to love my partner for who she is and where she is at – unconditionally.

    Thus, from your clear space in this moment, you are focused on what you want without attachment. You give your partner the same privelege and you trust that all is going to unfold as it will.

    Law of Attraction is a fascinating concept. It is a highly individual process as you cannot create in the space of another.

    When you have a deep, committed relationship, there is an influence of each of your energies on each other, and that can make life interesting.

    Seeing your partner as whole, complete, powerful and perfect – without conditions and expectations is the key to a shared journey that is mutually fulfilling.

    One of the beauties of LOA is that one never really knows the FORM that our requests will be delivered in. (Not to mention the timing).

    Be you, trust the process, let it go and get ready to receive.

    And, wear comfy pants …

  2. Tia says:

    LOL I notice a twitter thread here 😉 wear comfy pants!

    Ok I’m not sure if this post fits in here (but then I’m sure it does lol) but this triggered a memory of something very cool that happened to me. Wasn’t a major player in my life but I sure learned something about letting go of resistance …

    Back in 2001, I was in Boston at a drug store – had just given 3 rolls of film to be developed and was to pick them up in an hour. I soon realised I only had a couple of pics left to take in my camera (yes, the pre-digicam days!) and so quickly went outside, took my shots n went running back to the lady.

    Well she says, sorry but its whatever-o-clock and the last order’s gone in. I said oh please could you take this last one, please and she went OFF on me about how she needed to get home, had worked 2 shifts and was so over people rushing in at the last minute etc etc. Wow, she was fuming. At that moment, I was sooo upset that I wanted to tell her off for being so snarky abt such a little thing.

    Instead I did something that took me by surprise! I leaned forward and asked her to come closer to the counter. She did, with this threatening look on her face and I just reached over and hugged her and said, I’m sorry you seem really tired and thank you anyways.

    Turned to go, she calls out to me, I go back, she takes my film roll and says come back in an hour. I was pleasantly surprised. But wait there’s more! An hour later I toodled up to her and she gave me my pix + bill. For $1.50 yes, thats right! I said oh you’ve made a mistake here I got 4 rolls done (abt $30 worth) and she said “no there is no mistake, a hug goes a long way lady”

    WOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! From being mad at her for being mad at me, to letting go and not expecting anything, and then have her go the extra mile for me, that was a powerful lesson I haven’t forgotten to this day.

    A Hug Goes a Long Way. 🙂 🙂 Indeed it Does!

  3. Mark, I’m loving this “win win” in comfy pants theme. 🙂

    You wrote about that recently – or at least I read it recently – and I’m trying to find a link to it again to offer here …

    In the meantime, being clear on what we want with no attachment is one of the key concepts I teach in my group courses!

    Thanks for posting, my friend. Always a pleasure to hear from you!

  4. Tia, I have to say, I am not at all surprised to hear this story from YOU! You would be the one who could come up with a hug in that moment.

    Truly, you rock!

    Thanks for inspiring us all to be bigger better huggers. 🙂

  5. Ms. Tee says:

    Well, I can’t really notice it in my own life but I see it all the time in movies. Like in Sex & the City when that chick got pregnant after she had adopted that little girl. She made peace with her situation and was no longer dependent upon her dream coming true to embrace the happiness that was already there. Once she made peace, she got more love than she asked for. That’s so beautiful to me!

  6. Kristy M says:

    That movie was the best ever 🙂 I LOVE Charlotte (both me and my best friend are ‘Charlottes’ lol) and thought that was so sweet.

  7. Judi says:

    Hi everyone,
    My most “difficult” moments in Contrary to Cocreation come about with me and my partner over the issue of my veganism and his meat eating!!! He has no problems with me being vegan – well he wouldn’t would he!!! But I have always had problems living with a meat eater.

    I have several times got into a place of no resistance – or at least I “think” I have. Must have been doing pretty good as at these times he would give up meat willingly and easily and seem fairly happy with it. But he’s really skinny and “believes” he needs the meat to give him energy and keep the weight on – so ends up going back to eating meat. I guess some time during his meatless days, something in both of us wavers and we go back to to the old vibration and he starts eating meat again.

    At the moment I am probably in the most accepting space of the meat eating that I’ve ever been. Shifted lots of stuff and love him for him. He adores animals and only eats the meat because of his old beliefs about energy/weight etc.

    I’ll just keep accepting and allowing and loving him anyway and I know, as sure as my fries are coming, that one day soon he will know for himself that he doesn’t need the meat anymore and that his body will rejoice in his new healthy diet!!

    Judi x

  8. Yeah, that happens in real life, too, more often than we might guess, Ms. Tee! I love that example myself. (And the characters!)

    And Judi, I wouldn’t be surprised if when you do make complete peace with his diet that you don’t even notice whether he eats meat or not – because you will have no charge on it whatsoever.

    🙂

  9. Peregrine John says:

    Aaaah, once again I am reminded how little time I have to write, these days! Jeannette, you are an inspiration far too often… if that makes any sense. For now I’ll just borrow a line from my Okie relatives and say: Lordy, yes! So much here:

    Tia makes the perfect example of how doing the loving thing – even if you don’t feel like it – generally is the best thing. Love, love that story!

    All too often we think of things, especially at-odds goals, as zero-sum situations. I come to respect Brad Pitt more and more as time passes.

    The lack of neediness is something people find very useful in many social situations, and while many articles have been written about that already, I’ll be writing another one when certain goals have been reached to free valuable writing time.

  10. Who’da thought we’d be coming to respect Brad Pitt more and more as time passes! ha ha

    In the meantime, I’m using my manifesting powers for GOOD and intending you get an abundance of valuable writing time (as you seem to be ready for and desirous of!) very soon. For my own selfish sake. lol

    Much love, my friend.

  11. Tia says:

    Thanks John, funny thing is, I had no idea why I even called her over cos I was actually still very upset .. it was as though something else within me (my soul?) just reached out to her (soul?) and hugged her despite how I (my mind / emotions?) was feeling. It was the work of the soul, yest I see that now. Do you have a Blog/site link? Wld love to read some of your work.

    I agree Jeannette – my respect for the man grows as his brood does!

  12. Tia, even your name makes me smile. I think you’re infectious! In the best possible way. 😉

  13. Peregrine John says:

    I love the name too! Three letters that just seem warm and friendly, somehow. Go figure.

    Tia, I do have a blog of very general topics, which reflects the uncategorized randomness that is my brain. I plan to start one specifically for LOA and related subjects, but have only made fits and starts at it. My regular blog, The Open Book, isn’t much a home of deep thoughts, but I do post some of my photography there. In any case, you’re welcome to drop by!

    Jeannette, I have great faith in your manifesting abilities, and will happily add my own vibrations to them!

  14. Love your blog, John! Including the dog video. Happy dogs, happy people – does it get any better?!

    With your musings, it does. 🙂

    Thanks for the link!

  15. Tia says:

    Thanks for sharing John! I laughed out LOUD when I read yr new token political post ~ thats the funniest thing I’ve read all day 😀

    I have no general direction with my Blog too, as of now its just whatever I feel like writing even though LOA and addictions seem to play a part in most of my posts.

    Thanks you two for the warm n fuzzies – did you know (well u didnt so Im telling you 😉 I dropped the N from Tina (what I’m called back in India) and changed my name to Tia in 2000 and I’ve loved it since.

    I love that I decided to choose my own name Its so much more ME than any other name cld be. Even If I’d still be a Rose with any other name … Rambling (rose) on!

  16. Peregrine John says:

    Heh, heh. Thanks, Tia! My political posts are pretty much aimed, these days, at pointing out how hilariously deranged people get. Susie’s comment (#39) on the witchy post has what I’m trying to get across to non-LOA people, and that’s the realization that unthinking negativity is really silly. So I make fun of it all with facts and logical judo. Glad you enjoyed it!

    So a Rose by any other name turns out to be Tia, huh? Sweet. It’s a great name.

    And many thanks to you too, Jeannette! As always, you’re too way too kind (though I’m not objecting 🙂 ), but I gotta agree that happy people are great, and happy dogs… well, they make me happy people! 😀 I’ll have some photos from my vacation up there soon-ish, I hope.

  17. Floyd Bogart says:

    This article has helped me identify a part of the process that I didn’t understand completely. When I was having difficulty with manifesting, I would move to acceptance but never understood that I was then manifesting the acceptance into a static situation instead of allowing it to lead where it should.

    Thoughts?

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