How I Learned Resistance Is Futile
After nearly five years of marriage, I divorced in the 90s. While it was a mostly amicable divorce, I knew I never wanted to do it again.
It just wasn’t my idea of a good time – lawyers, judges, court fees, strangers in my personal business. Not super fun.
So it’s a simple fix to avoid that, right? Just don’t get married again.
Surely that would work, right?
Because what we resist persists.
And when we have a strong charge on something, whether wanted or unwanted, it’s a beacon requiring it to manifest. No matter how “impossible” it might seem. No matter what action we take to guarantee the opposite.
I would have sworn that no way could I get divorced again when I refused to marry! That just couldn’t happen.
But … a couple years ago during a less than fabulous breakup with a live-in co-mortgagee boyfriend, when we were not in agreement about who should stay and who should go, he threatened that his divorce attorney said a judge would force the sale of the house if we couldn’t agree.
“Your divorce attorney?!” I couldn’t believe my ears.
He hired an attorney?! I was stunned.
And no, we did not meet the qualifications for a common law marriage (I’d made certain of that over the years), so there should not have been any blankety-blank attorneys involved.
And yet, there they were.
Because when he said that, I got over myself and hired one, too.
My attorney confirmed a judge would never rule that. He also said a judge wouldn’t see us to begin with since we weren’t married. We would have to file mutual consent to be treated as a married couple, in which case I would be eligible to receive half his retirement account.
So I told my ex he needed a new attorney because he was getting terrible advice that could be very costly if he pursued this line.
Which was my ex’s turn to be horrified at the mention of a divorce attorney. He was furious I’d hired one. (Maybe he thought I’d rely on my LOA powers to manifest my way out of this without legal counsel. Except he didn’t know the powerful match I was to a divorce by attempting to avoid one all these years.)
Anyway, it turned out that my ex’s “attorney” was just a friend on the golf course he talked to during a game one afternoon. He hadn’t actually hired anyone who knew what they were doing.
But I had.
So there I was – a girl so intent on never divorcing again that she sworn off marriage, going through another divorce with another attorney.
Resistance is futile.
This applies to any subject we have a strong charge about …
My mom thought to avoid the heartbreak of losing a dog by refusing to adopt another one. And yet, she’s grown quite close to my pit bull Joe, so I suspect that plan is already foiled. (Can’t blame her, everyone loves Joe. He’s the best dog ever!)
Another friend thought to avoid the heartbreak of losing a beloved pet to illness by getting a purebred next time around. That’s a questionable plan even without considering law of attraction.
Whatever we’re strongly intent on avoiding – whether tax audits, cancer, theft, getting fired, crime, traumatic accidents – whatever we have a strong charge on and are intent on avoiding – word to the wise is to soften that energy. Because it’s a strong signal that plucks exactly what we don’t want straight from the ethers. With our name on it.
I don’t mean to sound scary or ominous about this. I’m just saying, divorce isn’t that bad – and neither is whatever you really don’t want. Even if it was, it doesn’t work to push against it.
Making peace or getting neutral about it – and putting energy into what you do want – is a much better plan for skipping the experience.
The good news is I learned to love divorce attorneys that last go-round. (Seriously, they rock! Mitch Olsen Jr renewed my faith in attorneys. He was all about smoothing things out, being fair, skipping court and saving money. Really great guy!)
Plus I learned the power of my focus even better than I understood it before. I learned how to make peace with things I didn’t think I could be peaceful with.
I was also reminded that my best approach, rather than taking action in an attempt to guarantee what I want, is to find a way to feel better and let Universe work it out.
The next time you think you can outsmart law of attraction through action, please remember me and my second divorce that should not have been. Vibration trumps action every time.
In fact, here’s more manifesting inspiration from this story – the next time you wonder whether Universe can do impossible things, just think of my divorce without being married. It can do all sorts of things you don’t see a way for! lol