Q&A: Law of Attraction Morals?

September 30, 2012 | 23 Comments »

Right and Wrong with Law of AttractionHow does law of attraction work when we’re manifesting something morally ambiguous (or even blatantly “wrong”)?

And what happens when we have conflicting feelings about what we want?

Does LOA come back to bite us, or is it completely neutral in what it delivers?

That’s the question that has come up twice in two days:

A coach emailed about a situation with one of her clients: the client is a personal trainer substituting for a colleague. One of the trainees asked if the sub would train her privately, but the trainer feels like it might not be super cool to steal a client from her colleague like that.

Then on yesterday’s student coach call, we talked about what to do when your client has conflicting feelings about their goal. (Like when someone once asked for help manifesting no side effects from her recreational drug use. She had mixed feelings about doing drugs, though – loved the high but worried that her family relationships and professional reputation would be ruined if others learned about her habit.)

I know fellow creators who have wondered whether it was appropriate to intend a separation or divorce for a love interest of theirs. And some manifesters get hung up in feeling it’s not right to wish for personal financial abundance while so many others have so little.

A friend shared about someone who did a money abundance spell and when she made a cash withdrawal the bank teller gave her double her money. She didn’t realize it until she got home, which is when she wondered whether it was a sign that her money flow was opening or a test for her to return it. She didn’t want to reject it if this is the avenue the universe wishes to provide but, wasn’t sure it was ethically okay for her to keep it.

It shows up lots of different ways.

And has led many folks to wonder whether there was a right and wrong with law of attraction.

But let’s get to the question that inspired this Q&A post:

If I “steal” a client from my colleague, does that mean law of attraction will deliver the same thing happening to me at some point?

Or was this perhaps Universe’s way of delivering my desire for more clients?

Looking to you, wise ones, for input on this fellow creator’s fun question. What are your thoughts on best manifesting practices when it comes to the morals and ethics of LOA?

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23 Responses to “ Q&A: Law of Attraction Morals? ”

  1. Pernille Madsen says:

    Powerful question!!

    To me the only thing that matters is how it feels.

    If I felt I was stealing someone’s client, I would probably not do it, because steeling doesn’t feel good to me (and what we give our attention to we get more of, so I wouldn’t risk getting stolen from myself in any way).

    If it felt good instead – if I felt this client and I were a perfect match or something like that and there was no feeling of “wrongness” present, I would do it.

    I have released myself from general moral laws and follow only one law these days – my intuition /gut feeling. Does it feel good? thne it IS good for me. Does it feel bad? then it is NO for me.

    And I have stopped judging others! We are all different and we all have different rules and morals – and we all are simply doing our best to feel better / relief / good 🙂

  2. That’s the part I’d love to spotlight from your comment, Pernille. (I agree with all of it!) But when you said stop judging others – that is a helpful reminder.

    Because we can’t know what feels good and what doesn’t feel good to someone else.

    And that’s what makes all the difference. So something that I might be comfortable with, if you weren’t, it wouldn’t serve you. And vice versa.

    Thanks for starting this discussion, my friend!

  3. Steve says:

    If she feels that she is “stealing” a client then that probably isn’t the thing for her to do. However if she is meant to have that client (or they are meant for each other)then I believe it will manifest in some other way.

    Steve

  4. That’s what I was wondering, Steve, is where her word of “stealing” came from. Was it something she felt herself, or something she worried someone else would feel or interpret?

    I don’t personally think it’s stealing if someone delivers it to you on a platter. But if SHE feels differently about it, then that’s what she wants to honor. Thanks for posting, Steve.

  5. Jesann says:

    Yeah, if she’s using the term “stealing,” that’s a clue right there that she is not comfortable with this and that it’s not feeling very good to her. Maybe tell the client that she can’t do it now but that there might be openings in her schedule down the road, but the client will have to look out for those/call back/etc. That way the client has to openly initiate leaving the regular trainer, and the intending trainer won’t be “stealing” anyone, but taking on a new client instead.

    As for the others, I can’t get into the idea of intending that someone have a divorce because the intender wants to have a relationship with them. That’s manipulative and unfair to the others who are (unintentionally) involved. The intender would need to step up and intend for the “perfect person for them” without naming names. Trying to use LOA to manipulate others’ lives is obsessive in my book.

    As for the drug use one, I’ll tentatively say that she’s got to make the choice between her relationships and the high. She’s not going to be able to change people to suit her needs; even if she successfully intends to be surrounded by people who don’t mind, she could end up seeing her current friends and family drop out of her life before finding people who don’t mind.

  6. You know what I was thinking, Jesann? That the drug user was projecting her own mixed feelings about her drug use onto others. We do that sometimes, when we worry that “they’ll think this or that” when the truth is that’s what WE think – subconsciously or not.

    Regardless, it wants to get cleaned up! Alignment is the name of the game. However we get there doesn’t matter – making that journey does.

    Thanks for posting, Jesann!

  7. Jrnnigrt says:

    hmmm… does this person feel like it is stealing, or is that the feeling he/she gets from society’s programming? i would go with how it feels, though… i mean, since the trainer was approached by the person wanting their services, is it really stealing? hard one to come to a conclusion with!! lol

  8. Dana Boyle says:

    As for the “stealing” of a client, I don’t believe there are any clients to steal. Our ideal clients find us and reflect to us what we need at the moment for clarity, or for joy in what we do. If we’re a match, we’re a match. I don’t get upset if someone chooses to work with someone else. I also don’t feel bad if someone comes to me having left another service provider of the same kind – coach or lawyer.

    I think when it comes to wishing to manifest something “wrong” – we label things wrong, and I would personally label cheating wrong. That aside, I would think it’d be tough to manifest from a scarcity standpoint – so if you’re grasping for your love to leave their spouse, it probably won’t happen. If you are ok with what is and allow whatever will be, it might be more likely to happen. You also may be likely to manifest your own evolution in that scenario – eventually not being ok with things as they are yourself. Either way, I think the person cheating probably has some things kinked up. At the very least, there are some worthiness kinks there. Most people don’t want to be someone’s mistress and want to be the main dish. Choosing someone who is unavailable says something about your availability or your feelings of worth regarding having an available mate who loves only you.

    As for the drug use thing, that’s a personal freedom choice, and I would say intending that all is well despite the use might still work. But intending that nobody gets hurt from it, or that no bad things come of it, well…I think Universe hears the thing you’re resisting. There may be some denial in the vibration there, as well. Everyone has to do what they feel is right for them, but I do believe that even the things we put into our bodies have vibration and it all depends on whether we’re being destructive or constructive with our use of them.

  9. I totally agree, Jrnnigrt! I think it’s important for us to discern what is OUR own true thought/belief and what’s been pushed onto us by others. The benefit of doing that is we can ensure we’re acting from our true self which is highest alignment.

    Well said, my friend!

    And Dana, I was thinking the same thing. If I were the regular trainer and found out one of my people would rather be working privately with the sub trainer, I’d be glad they found each other!!

  10. Barbara says:

    For me, if it’s a judgment-based feeling, then it’s time to clear up the judgment! Get rid of the “shoulds” and then go with what feels good (as Pernille said). I agree with Jrnnigrt’s comment about societal programming: Often our feelings are a result of society’s judgments so working on self-worth, self-love, and getting rid of the “shoulds” contributes to clarity on what truly is your “feel good” vibe. Basically, as I’ve heard Wayne Dyer say before, you have to not believe everything you think (and) ignore the good opinion of others. 🙂

  11. That’s an important one to practice all around, isn’t it, Barbara? Thanks for posting that.

    And Janette, I LOVE that one! It doesn’t matter WHAT, it only matters how it FEELS. Such a good one to remember and incorporate.

    Great to hear from you two on this one! Thank you!

  12. Ashley says:

    There is a reason behind the old saying “Do the right thing and it will come back to you 10 fold.” That is “old school” LOA.

    I see this client issue over and over in my real estate business where it is pretty easy to pick up (or steal, however you want to say it) client that belongs to a colleague. I don’t like it when it happens to me; it feels pretty terrible so I don’t do it to others.

    If I desire increased business or new clients I don’t need to go to desperate measures. If I send a client back to the person that they have been working with the Universe generally sends someone even better than the one that I sent back and sometimes the one sent back multiplies into several great new clients. Another “old school” LOA adage is “When one door closes another opens.” That is so true every time!

  13. Janette says:

    Here’s one of my favourite Abe-Hicks quotes:

    “There is nothing that you can do that is worse for yourself, than to do something that you believe is inappropriate. And so, get clear and happy about whichever choice you make. Because it is your contradiction that causes the majority of the contradiction in vibration.”

    In other words, if your own core values and current internal moral compass mean that DEEP DOWN you think the proposed action is inappropriate – then you need to honour that. Or genuinely change that belief. Not go into denial because it’s convenient, but genuinely find a different perspective.

    Our words are incredibly powerful clues that tell us what our current moral compass and beliefs are. The word “steal” is a really strong word for this situation, so there’s a pretty big shift in belief required before taking any action. If it feels like theft, then honour the feeling.

    Same with the drugs situation. If there’s a belief about being judged, or a feeling of being inappropriate within the legal structure of the country where you live, or a concern about family being upset – then you have a choice. Genuinely change the belief; or honour it. It’s the disconnect between belief and action which feels bad, because we’re not honouring our authentic self.

    What does inner guidance say? Are those beliefs coming from others? Or is there a genuine, deep down core value which sets the direction of your moral compass? Only you can know. It’s not for anyone else to tell you.

  14. Berta says:

    As other have stated, if it feels like stealing, then it’s an upstream vibe. If the client and sub-trainer really click, maybe the sub-trainer could put out the intention for the best possible outcome for all three.

    Assuming nothing and impeccable communication between all three might lead to the sub-trainer and client working together because they really click, and the trainer might be relieved or at least totally OK with client leaving–leaving an opening for a new client the original trainer totally clicks with. The Universe works in mysterious and marvelous ways!

  15. That’s the heart of alignment, isn’t it, Ashley? (Doing the “right thing” – whatever that is to us.)

    And Berta, I like that solution! Set an intention for best possible outcome! Way to release the “hows.”
    🙂

  16. Monica says:

    Surely it is the client’s right to choose who they give their money to. It sounds to me like neither the original trainer nor the sub is really the right match. If it’s not a “hell, yes!”, then it’s a no. For everyone.

  17. That’s how I see it, too, Monica. How screwed up would it be if we couldn’t go to someone we liked better because “so and so knew us first”? Seems easy to remedy by simply having a conversation with a colleague to it all feels on the up and up.

    Wow, could it work this same way in love, do you think??! lol

  18. You and are on the same page for that client/trainer situation, Donna.

    And here’s what I did when faced with a similar money situation:

    Years ago after I started intending easy money, money that wasn’t mine started showing up in my account.

    The first time it happened I called the credit union to tell them there was a mistake with my balance they needed to know about (extra money in there that wasn’t mine); they offered to charge me $12/hr to sit with a financial planner who could help me balance my checkbook. I said I AM a financial planner! I don’t need help balancing my checkbook!

    The second time it happened, I called again. Got the same response. I stopped calling after that. They never contacted me to fix the “mistakes” and I eventually stopped trying to balance my checkbook. Although, for all I know, it was MY mistake, not theirs! But I really don’t think so.

    That was easy to feel good about because I did what felt right.

    Anyway, thanks for posting, Donna! Feelin’ the love and sending some right back atcha!
    🙂

  19. Donna Rae says:

    It is a clients choice/free will to choose whom they work with. That would not be stealing to me. However, if the trainer/teacher tries to “talk them into” their practice, that is unethical.

    As to the woman the bank teller gave more money to, she should return to extra to the bank, absolutely. I wouldn’t want that karma!

    Thanks, Jeanette, I love you.

  20. Shari says:

    First let me just say what a GREAT TOPIC this is!

    That said, I have experienced the money situation myself in a variety of combinations and have found that if I realized there was a mistake, I return the money/fortune to keep my flow of abundance clear of obstructions (doubts). It was not always easy, so sometimes I’ve done so begrudgingly, however, what I’ve found to happen is that I have ended up with higher amounts of fortune that are CLEARLY meant for ME right around the corner!!! It has really left me AMAZED and quickly solidified my belief that keeping my vibration clear of doubts/fear is the top priority and everything else comes around… 😉

  21. Anna says:

    In my world, this kind of conundrum is always solved by one simple thought – the best for all involved.

    That takes a lot of responsibility off my shoulders, because I do not have to come up with an answer to what is the *right* thing to do. Working that angle is GUS’s thing (God Universe Source). My primary job is to feel “best for all involved” and once I hand that over to GUS, I can let go and do whatever I want – like having a fire, listening to music, putzing in the yard, playing cards with my kid… Anything I desire that has nothing to do with the conundrum – because that ship sailed when I reassigned it. (to GUS of course)

    As *always*, what results is best for all involved. Whether I saw it ahead of time, at the time, or not at all, it’s *always* the best for all involved. (and yes, that includes you and me!)

  22. helen says:

    If the trainer didn’t go into the group with the intention of getting new clients for their business then it is hardly stealing if one of the participants decides they like you and want more!! however if the trainer feels like there is a judgement there about stealing regardless of who might think that way obviously there is some issue for that person to address. As for the drug thing I think it would be harder to feel okay about that mostly because of the huge amount of negativity within society about drugs and the people who take them. but nothing is impossible ……..as others have said if you dont feel positively inclined toward some action then dont do it until you either feel better about it or find another better feeling action for yourself.

  23. law of attraction says:

    Really a nice meter of this post.I read your post.Thanks for share your post with us.

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