LOA Regrets?

May 13, 2008 | 27 Comments »

All week long I’ve thought about what we collectively created with our powerful imaginations at last week’s virtual party.  You all know how potent our thoughts are, and that just by imagining a huge celebration we created it on some level. 

That’ll be a fun one to see manifest in the physical world.  I was certain that would be the topic of this next post, including some questions I was recently asked about Second Life and how LOA plays out in that virtual reality …

.. but today I’m thinking about those of us who get what we said we wanted, then realize it isn’t at all what we wanted.

Have you ever found yourself repeatedly wishing that you didn’t have to go this job?  Or to bed with this man?  Or raise these children?  Or clean this house?  Or attend this family get-together?

And then did you ever find the job pulled out from under you, the man making his exit, custody of the kids challenged, or the family ignoring you?

I sure have.

Some of my clients complain that Universe only delivers on the stuff they didn’t really want.  We know that’s not true.  It just seems true because of where our focus is and what our vibe is lined up with.

Which is good incentive to switch up the focus and upgrade the vibe, huh?

When I was engulfed in my miserable corporate job, I fantasized about not having to return to it EVER.  “Take This Job and Shove It” was my favorite tune.  I hummed it every day on the way to the bus stop while I left my happy dogs at my comfy home to pound my way through another life-draining day in the working world.  All I wanted was out.

And then my manager wrote me up for something ridiculous, and it became clear he intended to fire me at his first legal opportunity.

That created up a whole new vibe for me – dread and misery was replaced with fear and anger, sprinkled with resentment.  Topped off with even more fear.  (Thank you gremlins for that tasty treat.)

All of a sudden I not only wanted this job, I NEEDED it! 

I wasn’t LOA savvy enough to realize I’d ordered this up; that Universe had heard my “take this job and shove it” instruction and could only deliver it in a way that matched my “miserable” vibe – by getting fired.

Fire me?!  I was the most employable person on the planet!  Who in their right mind would try to unload me?! 

Nope, there was nothing good about my energy; thus Universe had no room to deliver a nice easy exit – which it clearly heard me wanting.

I could have avoided that disgraceful exit by changing my focus, which would have shifted the vibe. 

  • I could have been grateful for the continuing stream of paychecks that allowed me to get finances in order, preparing for more financial leeway in life. 
  • I could have looked forward to the co-workers I spent each day with, and the clients I’d grown to love over the years (still do). 
  • I could have appreciated the garden of flowers right outside my workplace, where I spent lunch hours reading. 

But I didn’t. 

I know better now, which is why I’m sharing this with those of you who are unhappy with something in life.  Universe will bring change, but it won’t be pleasant if you don’t improve the vibe.

Just ask my client who fantasized about getting a year off her high pressure career to focus on herself, and days later was in a motorcycle accident that left her bedridden for exactly one year – plenty of time to focus on herself. 

Or my client who dreamed of escaping the hassles of single parenthood, whose ex-husband sued for full custody. 

Or how I used to dread family dinners because they were so upsetting, and very soon I was upset because I stopped getting invited to them.

Until we learn to manage the vibe, our roads will continue to include unnecessary bumps and bruises. 

This post is long enough, so I’m tossing it to you now … would love to hear your thoughts and experiences!

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27 Responses to “ LOA Regrets? ”

  1. Paulette says:

    Another great post — Thanks

  2. Thanks for reading, Paulette! Always good to know you’re part of the energy here!

  3. Ms. Tee says:

    Yes.

    I often fantasized about what it would be like to have been able to follow my dream of being a journalist when I couldnt because I have small children and am a single parent.

    One day, I got fired from my job, my kids went to live with their father and I’ve become that journalist that I’ve always wanted to become, on the red carpet, writing for magazines, getting paid for my thoughts…

    And now..I just want my kids back and to be a full-time Mom again.

    It’s about appreciating where you are. I’ve learned that. God help me to appreciate my NOW.

  4. Tee!! I’m so excited to see you here! And to hear your experience .. wow.

    This is maybe a good opportunity to practice the belief where we can have our cake and eat it too, huh?

    I know lots of times we don’t see how things fit together, things that seem to be in obvious conflict.

    But it is as we believe/expect. So if we could find our way to believe we can have it all, Universe has to accommodate us, right?

    I turned it over to Universe when I was in a three way love triangle that seemed impossible to resolve. Have my cake and eat it too? Seemed impossible. These guys wouldn’t go for it.

    Within days of giving my instruction to Universe, it sure enough resolved perfectly – even better than I could have imagined.

    Universe is pretty resourceful that way. lol

    You’re absolutely right, Tee – the key is connecting with appreciation for what is NOW. As you do that, only good things can unfold.

    Thanks for pitching in here! A true pleasure to hear from you.

    And might I add, what an amazingly gifted journalist you are! Your work is incredible!

  5. Missy B says:

    Great post – thanks … but I’m confused !

    “Just ask my client who fantasized about getting a year off her high pressure career to focus on herself, and days later was in a motorcycle accident that left her bedridden for exactly one year – plenty of time to focus on herself.”

    This is where I always say be careful for what you wish for. Is it purely because you client wasn’t vibrating on a high that her year off came at an unexpected cost ? Let go of the hows I hear everyone say. But how can we ask the Universe to deliver in a neat positive package. For example … I want a cash injection to clear my overdraft … but not at the expense of a loved one’s death. Do you see what I mean ?

    I do hope I’ve made sense !

    Missy B

  6. Yes, Missy B, I totally understand your question!

    I remember first reading this in Calibrese’s book, I believe, where a friend of hers wanted a new car stereo, and subsequently had her current car stereo stolen, which made her friend go out and get her new car stereo.

    Not what she had in mind, to say the least.

    I believe the way events unfold is dictated by what our vibration is. So if I’m staying in the positive places (on the emotional scale), then something bad isn’t going to happen. Or at least it won’t feel “bad” to me.

    I don’t feel the need to “cya” my instruction to Universe by saying “and I want that in a pleasant, easy enjoyable manner.” Which is what some practitioners will tell you to do in order to avoid accidents, robberies, deaths, etc.

    I know that when I feel good, good things happen. When I feel stressed, stressful things happen. Managing my vibe (energy) is the best thing I could do to ensure things happen in easy, happy, pleasant ways.

    Which is also why I had to quit my corporate job before I could make any good headway in building a coaching practice. While I was working that job, the people who came to me for coaching were more often than not sick, broke and miserable. A perfect reflection of what I was feeling.

    Since I wasn’t able to find my way to a better feeling place while still going to that job every day, quitting it is what freed my vibe up and allowed me to attract very positive-feeling success.

    So I agree we should ensure that we really want what we say we want (because we’ll get it if we stick with that desire). And when we combine that desire with a positive vibration, good things happen.

    Does that make sense?

    I love the question you offered here, Missy B! Thanks for chiming in!

  7. Flavia says:

    Thank you Jeannete. Another great one just in time for more synchronicity.

  8. Thanks for reading, Flavia, and for dropping a note! I love knowing you’re here. 🙂

  9. Zoe Routh says:

    Hi there Jeannette

    Oh my god – this is the perfect post for a client I spoke with today – so thanks for saving me all that time by posting perfectly on this exact topic! You are such a marvel 🙂

    Zoe

  10. Glad it was of use, Zoe. I can’t think of too many folks who don’t have a story like this to tell … so I thought it was high time to write about it.

    Good motivation to keep the focus on feeling good, huh? 😉

  11. Grant says:

    Greetings guys, I always find those stories where people get things they desire in ways they don’t necessarily desire ie a motorcycle accident 🙂

    The universe has a sense of humour anyway 🙂 or just takes the quickest route it can find based on your current vibration perhaps.

    Keep choosing guys,
    Grant:)

  12. Grant, we’ll tell a different story just for you! One of ease, effortless, pleasant surprise, and smiles all around! lol

    Coming up … !

    Thanks for dropping a note, Grant. I like your sense of humor and your sign-off (“keep choosing”).

    Come back soon! 🙂

  13. Kat says:

    Thanks, Jeannette, for a great post! I have been talking about how exhausted I’ve been lately….guess what I have…a big, nasty cold that I am trying hard to shake. I can see that that is the problem. I drew the cold to me thinking about how worn out I’ve been, now I still have it because I keep thinking about how much I don’t want it!!! My new mantra will be ” I am healthy and I breathe easily!”

    Kat

  14. Nice turnaround, Kat! Add in there lots of rest and tlc and you’re golden! Sounds like your body is a perfect partner for clueing you in to when it’s time to be easier on yourself. 🙂

    I LOVE that about our bodies! They don’t let us get too out of line, do they? lol

    Good partners, there.

    Thanks for joining the conversation, Kat. Here’s to your perfect health and easy breathing! (And maybe lazy, restful weekends?) 😉

  15. Kim Falconer says:

    Wonderful post, Jeannette!

    I recently got a letter from a friend who went on and on about how she wanted this and that, and also how bad she felt about what was in her life. It was like one of those scathing critiques of a film, only the movie was her own life! And sure enough, like dominoes the experiences she’s having keep getting worse and worse and worse. It would make a funny story if it was all over and in the past!

    She blames various things, and asked me when her horrid Saturn transit would be over. I said, “As soon as you want it to be!”

    What’s making her life dive into gloom is not Saturn (who ruled over the golden age of plenty and is associated with the cornucopia) or any kind of bad luck transit etc. She’s just getting what she’s vibe’in.

    The latest thing she said was, “i need a break from all this mess,” and sure enough, she got a vile flu and is held up in bed. I suggested she relax and enjoy the down time, catch up on her sleep, meditation, reading or favorite films (preferably comedy!) and things would turn around.

    Why isn’t this taught to us in schools! LOA 101 would be perfect, starting in pre-school, don’t you think?

    Thank you for teaching us now! You make my life brighter, being part of my world!

    xxx

  16. Kim, I am SO in love with your answer (about when horrid Saturn return will be over): “As soon as you want it to be!”

    Incredibly empowering, and TRUE!! (of course I would think so)

    I love that someone who knows as much as you do about astrology has been able to marry that helpful info with powerful deliberate creation!

    Kim, you’re my hero!

    Do you get tired of my adulation? lol

    Thanks for sharing your words, as well as your friend’s experience. It’s exactly the situation that we ALL can learn from! (Cause let’s face it, we’ve all been there, done that – at some point!)

  17. Anon says:

    I am inclined to agree that I am a little confused as well from this blog.

    I understand how everything has unfolded due to the circumstances we vibrated and asked for.

    However, if we are wanting change, do we ask for the change in a positive vibration while still enjoying the pleasures of our less than perfect situation?

  18. leslie Richter says:

    I have to admit that I recently got a touch of enlightment regarding “the vibe”. First of all there is the catching of the vibe…mine was summer is approaching and this will be my second summer working at the store and last summer was horrendous. I felt cheated watching people in skimpy clothes march past me all day
    in “having fun” summer mode, not to mention the young staff that was working with that same mode and barely there.yada yada

    So I noticed that vibe and then I decided what vibe did I want this time around. The song Summertime and the living is easy came to mind. I realized my guidance was giving me a gentle nudge.

    At work I spent my half hour break sitting out in the quiet sun away from everyone, watching an eagle in the sky and feeling love and gratitude for Jeannette. It was the easy vibe and I soaked it up.

    The next day I started to whine about only getting 1/2 an hour of easy summer living. And that’s when I thought, here is where the bridge is – how much more of that feeling and vibe can I incorporate in this day?…and the next day and the next day.

    Until guess what I will be that vibe.

    Love Leslie

  19. Kim Falconer says:

    The thought that popped into my head when reading Anon and Leslie was, instead of asking for change, be the change. Cliche I know yet asking for something implies ‘not having it’ and puts the good vibe feeling on hole. For example, it’s harder for me to ‘act as if’ I already have what I want when I’m asking, or begging, for it.

    It’s easier to skip the asking part and go straight to the feeling of ‘I all ready have it!’

    As Jeannette has taught, it’s not the thing, the time off or the million bucks or the book deal or the fab relationship that we want anyway. It’s the feeling we think having it will give. I thought about this a lot yesterday on my last shift at the cafe. I kept thinking, this is the last time I’m going to serve this person, or this is the last time I’m going to scrub these trays or this is the last time I’ll work with these chefs… and I was absolutely filled with joy every moment.

    Not joy because I wouldn’t do those things again, but joy because I ever got to do them in the first place.

    Why wait to get to that feeling of ecstasy when you can have it right here, right now, at ground zero–no matter what is going on ‘out there’?

    It’s all in our heads, the notion of what can bring us pleasure or pain. We choose, every time, every day!

    Thank you Jeannette for your wonderful clarity on this!

    xxx Kim

  20. Thanks for posing your question, Anon.

    You asked: “if we are wanting change, do we ask for the change in a positive vibration while still enjoying the pleasures of our less than perfect situation?”

    I think that question sums it up nicely!

    And Kim’s words are valuable – instead of “asking for” the change (since asking vibrationally indicates “lack”), you’d want to embrace that changed vibe NOW.

    Staying (or getting to) a better-feeling vibe is extremely beneficial if you can manage it. Although I know that does take some practice.

    But you can do that if you are able to truly enjoy the pleasures of the current situation – which could be challenging when we see it as “less than perfect.” It’s so much easier to enjoy “perfect,” isn’t it?

    So if we could see how this current situation IS perfect, than enjoyment of it isn’t so “forced” or unnatural.

    I hope that makes sense.

    Let’s talk specifics, Anon!! Whatcha got goin’ on?

    (I thought I’d ask you rather than dive into a personal example that may or may not have been relevant to what you’re asking about.)

  21. Leslie, kudos to you for your ability to first of all NOTICE that you were going to a vibe that wouldn’t serve you, and then for building the muscle to reach a new, better-feeling one!

    Yay!

    I intend to catch YOUR “summertime and the living is easy” vibe! lol

    Delicious!!

  22. Kim Falconer says:

    Jeannette, I never get tired of your adulations, and I hope you never get tired of mine!

    And while you and Leslie are doing ‘summertime and the live’in is easy, I’m doing winter fires, slipper socks, hot soup and home baked bread! Cozy, lovely winter is here!

    I’m in love with the contrast!

    xxxKim

  23. Anon says:

    Currently, I am wanting to bring about a more positive outcome from a relationship.

    It has been a roller coaster ride for nearly three years now. I practiced delebrate creation to find this person and then once arrived, I started doubting and turned it into this relationship that has its moments. I want this relationship to turn into nothing more than a positive energy and have found a hard time getting there.

    I found your blog to be very beneficial and something inside steared me to focus on it a bit longer–maybe a que from my guidance (ha, ha)!

    You rock!

  24. Now there’s a thought I love: “In love with the contrast”! What a beautiful slace to live! Thanks for that one, Kim – I’ll enjoy that one today. 🙂

  25. Anon! Yay! Thanks for jumping in! I was hoping we could get to the heart of the matter together …

    … so let’s talk about what you want.

    What you REALLY want. The CORE of the desire that you’re holding. I’m talking about the true ESSENCE of it.

    Do you have an idea about it?

    Michael Neill says write down what you want, and then write down how that will make you feel.

    He says it’s the SECOND thing that you want, not the first.

    I’ve found that to be true in every experience with myself and clients I can think of.

    It isn’t so much the way it looks – as it is how it makes us FEEL that we’re truly after.

    I found this one out the hard way when I manifested someone specific into my life, and then discovered it wasn’t what I expected. Yes, he was there, by my side, doing it day in and day out, but what I REALLY wanted was to feel loved, connected, intimate, excited, GOOD. And that didn’t happen when I was focused on getting THIS guy in my life.

    I sure enough drew that guy in, but it wasn’t what I expected.

    Had I taken a different perspective and focused on how I wanted to feel in and about a relationship, then things would have turned out differently, I’m positive. (Either with him or someone else.)

    Getting back to the topic of this original post, the best thing you could do to allow your highest good in is to relax, enjoy what you can enjoy in present day life, get easier about all this, and trust that good things are unfolding for you and your relationships.

    As your vibe gets more in alignment with enjoyment and appreciation, then good things make a beeline for you. You don’t have to dictate all the minute details – just find ways to feel better and know that you absolutely can’t miss when it comes to your happiness.

    It is coming to you – even when – or perhaps ESPECIALLY when – it doesn’t look to be the case.

    Drop me a note at my email address jmaw at goodvibecoach.com and we can go into more detail if you like …

    I’d also invite those of you who have experience in this area – and I know there are many of you! – to pitch in!

    Thanks, all. 🙂

  26. Crys says:

    Jeanette,
    I’ve decided that in my reality, things come in the right season. I’m a very patient person. I heard someplace early on that if you ask for a companion/lover in your life but you still have a “yearning” for a former lover, the universe will see you as still attached and not bring a new one. I love Abrahams teachings. I can imagine that downstream is someone new and the old guy is upstream. Can’t really get there anyway !!
    The new one will come when the season is right. It’s okay to pine once in a while for the old one because that man will never be in season again. So I can relax and not get tangled up in how I feel. I let myself off the hook, which is my responsibilty since I hung myself there in the first place. So sometimes a timeframe is in order, but I think most times we can trust that things will come to us according to the rhymes and rythms of the universe. It’s all good !!
    Crys

  27. Yeah, that “yearning” is kind of a kick in the pants, huh? Yearning and good things don’t seem to match up too often.

    I love, Crys, how you see the old guy as upstream and the new guy as down. That’s so cool!!

    I think your “when the season is right” words would make a great song lyric. What a powerful reminder that all is well right now; no reason to get panties twisted – even when we realize we hooked ourselves.

    Because you’re right, of course, Crys – it IS ALL good!

    What a treasure to have you here reminding us with such sweet words. Thank you!!

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