Stuck in the Scaries?

April 21, 2008 | 48 Comments »

gremlin.jpgWhat do we do with the moments where it feels like life is crumbling down around us?  When we can’t pay the bills, our partner walks out, our job is in jeopardy or some other scary story we dive into? 

These are the questions I get virtually every day, and since I’ve been writing about reality tv so much I thought it was time for something from my own real life.  

I shared this example with my group class today, and thought it might come in handy for others who struggle with the scary parts of life, tired of their miracle not manifesting and wondering how to get some relief once and for all. 

Here’s what I did when I recently found myself stuck in a scary story:

My sweetie – and recent joint mortgagee (is that what you call someone who helps you make a big house payment?) – came home from bowling the other night announcing he had a dealbreaker on his hands. 

(We hadn’t talked in several days because of our schedules and it was starting to feel like we were more roommates than lovers.)

He’s got a dealbreaker? 

We used to joke about those – you don’t cook?  Oh, that’s a dealbreaker.  You don’t scoop litters?  Oh my, this will never work.  You don’t like guacamole?  What kind of alien are you?? 

But this night he wasn’t joking. 

I’d been sleeping in Anne’s bedroom (guest bedroom, named after my best friend and first guest) since I wasn’t getting any sleep with him due to snoring.  Lots of loud, impossible-to-sleep-through snoring.  Which, I was dealing with.  But not the case for him, apparently. 

He came home – to our expensive house we just bought together, remember (that was key fuel for gremlins) – and said, “This not sleeping together thing is a deal breaker for me.”

We’d been talking about the sleeping arrangements and experimenting with solutions, so this wasn’t the first time we’d had had this conversation.  But this wasn’t a conversation; it was an announcement. 

Well, that’s great. We both know where we stand now, and that’s not together, apparently.

Let the Gremlin Storm begin:

Here we are in our new house, that wouldn’t be easy for me to finance on my own (totally limiting belief). I just sunk all my cash into a significant down payment on this place. So I have no money. (Exaggeration.) I bought furniture that I wouldn’t have bought if it weren’t for him. (Not true either, half of it is exactly what I wanted.) I can’t move my cats again! (Lie.  Of course I could.) Everyone who ever said to me, “You’re no good in long term relationships” was right.   What will everyone think? I failed again. How come only the jerks want to hang out with me? This house is too big for me alone. I don’t want a roommate. I sure in the hell don’t want a new guy.

Gremlin City.  Anyone been here before?

Yeah, I know.  We all visit every once in a while. 

Here’s what I did: 

I hung out with the gremlins for a while. (Because what we resist, persists.)  I let them entertain me. “Really???! Oooooohh.” I let them scare me. Or give it their best shot anyway. “I might be homeless?? I might be penniless?? I might never be loved again?? I might be HOPELESS???” Ooooohhh.

I let them have their way with me: “Lanaiya told me to get some sort of pre-nup so this wouldn’t happen. I thought she was ridiculous. She was right?!  Sheesh.  People told me I should just live in his house before we bought a new one together. And everyone else told me not to even think I would be successful living with someone. I’m not wired that way.  They told me so.”

Really hard thoughts.

I didn’t resist them. I didn’t wish them away. I felt them. I heard them out.

And then I thought about it.

I checked in with my higher self: What do YOU think?

Ahh, she thinks all is well. She thinks this is perfect. She actually thinks this is kind of funny. ha ha We just move in together, and then he comes up with the dealbreaker?! What a HOOT!!! Come on, this is great material!! How can you not laugh about this?!

And I did. I laughed. She was right.

It was funny. Ridiculous and … well, just plain ridiculous.

And it WAS all well. If I move, I move. If I stay, I stay. If it ends, it ends. 

Either way, I’m going to enjoy it the best I can. Because that’s what life does. It throws us (more accurately: WE throw us) curve balls and things we didn’t see coming, and it’s all good. That’s how it works.

It keeps it interesting.

But this isn’t the big scary drama we make it out to be.

It might seem that way, and while it does, we may as well make the most of it (maybe even enjoy it). Because it’s just an illusion. What’s TRUE is that we are eternal perfect beings, who are incapable of “screwing up” – yes, even when your name is Hitler – and all of this is serving our highest good. We can’t fail, so we may as well stop thinking we can.

What would feel better in this moment?

Those were some of the thoughts that worked for me in that moment. I had to feel around a big bag of them before I found the ones that felt better. And the ones that felt better in that moment weren’t necessarily the same ones that felt better the next day, so it was a work in progress. But I kept heading in that direction.  “What would feel better?”

Whatever scary story you’re telling yourself, it’s the same process. Don’t resist it, or you’ll just stay stuck in it. Acknowledge it, know you’re not a “victim,” feel the feelings, and it will already start to feel better.

Once you’ve acknowledged and felt the scary thoughts, that gives you some room to work with. What’s so scary after you’ve looked at homelessness and unlovability and even death?

Once you look at the worst case scenario as played out by your gremlins, you’re not in resistance any more.

“This could be bad.”

Really? Let’s look at it. You see all the ugly scenes … and then ask: “Would I be okay through all of that?” Of course you would. Worst case scenario, you’re still okay.

Because it’s always okay. In each red hot moment we’re living in, we’re okay. There’s no such thing as a bad ending here. It’s impossible.

And when you feel the truth of that, those scary thoughts aren’t so scary any more. “Huh. I can do this.”

That “allowing” is the key to things starting to go your way.

Because we’re not fighting it any more. We’re not wishing it away. We’re not thinking of it as “wrong.”

“It’s fine. All is well. I can do this. This is perfect.”

Can you feel the freedom there?

Perfect isn’t a strong enough word for who we are and what we’re doing here.

A few nights later at our first dinner together after the dealbreaker announcement, I asked Russ what he believed about himself.

He listed a bunch of positive things I didn’t realize he felt about himself, which was nice to hear.  And then he added he also “has a habit of creating problems where there are none.”

And I asked, “Really? How so?”

He responded: “Like the not sleeping in the same bed with you thing. That’s no big deal.”

ha!

No big deal.  (Can you feel my smile?)

Of course it isn’t. And look at him seeing it. How perfect is that? I didn’t have to convince him. He saw it.

More perfection: something has mysteriously changed that allows me to sleep through the night with him now.  He still snores, but I’m sleeping.  Not every night, but more often than not. 

Maybe my adrenals healed to the point where I’m not as sleep-challenged as I used to be; maybe the supplements are zonking me out better; maybe I found the right level of exercise; maybe … maybe we each let go of the resistance.  I don’t know. 

All I know is it’s all good.

And it would have been just as perfect for me to live here alone, or with a roommate, or to move – again, or even to live here with a guy who had a dealbreaker on his hands.  And you know me well enough to know I’d have enjoyed every single one of those alternatives, too.

Can you see how impossible it is to screw up? We couldn’t if we tried.

* * * * * * * *
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48 Responses to “ Stuck in the Scaries? ”

  1. Peregrine John says:

    ‘Course, snoring is also no big deal, probably: it’s very curable, and will take care of 1 of your problems and 2 of his. If that don’t motivate him to get a fix, well, you might have a different deal breaker on your hands.

    Just saying.

  2. I would LOVE to hear about the cure, John. (It turns out I snore, too, although it doesn’t bother Russ since he sleeps with Ambien every night.)

  3. Peregrine John says:

    Well, my Dad’s chronic snoring turned out to be sleep apnea, which is a disruption of breathing while asleep and potentially dangerous. High blood pressure, stroke, strong daytime sleepiness, diabetes, that kind of dangerous. (Which is why I know anything at all on the subject, actually.)

    If someone is overweight or a smoker, they can probably cure snoring by fixing that/those. Asthma and allergies are also fixable causes, as sometimes are late-night alcohol consumption and some medicines. Some people simply inherited narrow breathing passages (men more than women) and there’s no permanent fix. However, not sleeping on one’s back can get around most of the above immediately. Those little nose-opening band-aid-looking things have helped people I’ve known, too.

    If all else fails, there are pretty safe surgical procedures that can adjust the soft tissues to where they don’t interfere with breathing.

    For what it’s worth, the moment I get any extra weight on me, I start snoring, which is both irritating to K and uncomfortable to me. It’s a good motivator for me! Now if I could only get a handle on that weight-control manifestation you’ve mentioned before, being rid of snoring for good could be mine!

  4. Kirsten says:

    Jeannette, thank you for this article! Lately I’ve encountered some “speed bumps” on my path and I needed to read advice like this.

    It’s appropriate that you referred to gremlins as a symbols of those annoyances that appear in the workings of our lives. Unlike other folklore characters like fairies and goblins, gremlins are a modern invention, appearing during World War II when they were blamed for messing with planes and annoying pilots. Seems like when we moved into the era of high technology, a new critter was born to throw us those curveballs.

    Here’s something cute–gremlins even messed around with the normally cool and unflappable Bugs Bunny: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3xXu_9JN3YA

  5. Thanks, John. His brother has sleep apnea – I wonder if that’s genetic?

    (Look at me, believing in genetics. ha ha)

    I think a surgical procedure is a fine idea – since it’s not me who’d be getting the surgery. !!

    In real life, we all know the easiest solution here is getting off the “your snoring keeps me awake” story. I think I’m making progress.

    And if a surgery helps me with that progress, more power to us all. lol

  6. Modern invention, huh, Kirsten? I didn’t realize that, but it makes sense.

    I have to admit, I loved your excuse to watch a cartoon this afternoon! Just even the familiar opening tune made me smile.

    Here’s to mastering the curves and enjoying the ride – speed bumps and all. 🙂

    Thanks for posting, Kirsten!

  7. You guys are so sweet to offer all the solutions! Thanks, Laura!

    I had tried ear plugs, and one of my clients said if ear plugs didn’t work than I wasn’t using the right ones. She recommended these silicone plugs that did make a big difference. They even worked for about a week.

    But forget all that – tell us about the cure for chocolate cravings! I’ve been using magnesium, and although it makes a noticeable and significant difference, it’s still a big part of my life.

  8. Laura says:

    You may have already tried this but since I didn’t see it mentioned, ear plugs work for me. My husband isn’t overweight but does snore, even lying on his side. After 18 years of being together and still going strong, we have separate adjoining bedrooms. He’s a night owl who likes to sleep until noon, I wake up early and read in bed so separate rooms work for us and its always fun to have a spontaneous sleep over! In go the ear plugs when the snoring starts.

    PS: John, I’ve lost 37 pounds and I can tell you how I finally got control of my appetite and cured my daily craving for chocolate, if you are interested.

  9. Paul. says:

    If he should happen to be diagnosed with sleep apnea, there’s also a machine that’s an alternative to the surgery. I foget the name but it’s a mask connected to a fan that keeps the soft tissues of the throat/mouth/lungs from blocking up. Hopefully, it; nothing that requires such solutions as machines or surgery.

    I appreciated your post on gremlins. My gremlins have seemed to have invited in their extended families to move in and not a one of them has offered to help with the rent. It’s time to try the steps, serve some “eviction notices” and get back to working my vibe. Thanks for the timely thoughts (and congratulations on a happy resolution to the faux problem!).

  10. Laura says:

    Ok, but it’s going to sound like a sales pitch but it’s the God’s honest truth, I swear. I started drinking this juice called Mona Vie back in July. My neighbor gave me it to try. It looks like a wine bottle but there’s no alcohol in it, just a blend of 19 wild and organic fruits, including the acai berry from the amazon, highest in antioxidants. One bottle lasts one person one week. You only drink 2 oz. in the morning before breakfast and 2 oz. in the late afternoon or before dinner – so only 4 oz. a day.

    By the start of my third bottle my appetite was almost gone and so were my cravings for chocolate. The thought of eating chocolate never even crossed my mind! This is a big deal for me because before this juice, I HAD to have chocolate every day and no amount of will power could control my NEED for chocolate. So since the beginning of August ’07 I no longer desire, crave or even think of eating chocolate! My sister was also addicted to chocolate and she had the same results on this juice.

    Mona Vie leveled out my blood sugar. I used to go from not hungry to ravenous and now that is gone. I’ve lost 37 pounds without really trying. I don’t crave snack foods any more. It has cut my grocery bill in half! I was already eating fruits and veggies and had what I thought was a healthy diet. I used to eat a meal and then be hungry 1-1/2 hours later. Not any more. This juice really works for me.

    Its not sold in stores. Its sold person to person. Its MLM. However you feel about mult level marketing is up to you. I became a member to buy it wholesale. I’m sticking with it ’cause I am finally free of the chocolate addiction and I’d like to lose a few more pounds. My husband drinks it and it has improved his eyesight so much that he no longer needs to wear glasses for the first time in his life (at age 44). Yeah, he still snores but he is sleeping much better and his knee pain is gone.

    Yeah, I know, sounds like a big sales pitch but I swear its the truth. My Mona Vie friends have all had great results with their health issues and every one of them has noticed a big change in their appetite and have lost weight.

    If you want to check it out and get a bottle to try, my website is TheUltimateJuice.net. All the scientific info is there. The acai berry grows on the very palm trees that were being cut down to clear land in the rain forest. Mona Vie pays the locals three times what they would normally make to pick the berries and to bring them out of poverty. It is now illegal to cut down the acai palm tree, which is helping to save the rain forest. Mona Vie also provides housing, education, health care, job training and food to the orphans of Brazil through the MORE project. I know this is more than what you wanted to know but when a company is doing the right thing, it should be recognized for it.

    I had asked the universe for a way to lose weight and keep it off and to get rid of my chocolate addiction. Mona Vie showed up and has given me so much more than what I asked for. The universe is so good at doing that!

  11. Thanks Jeannette, this was just what I needed to read!
    Bridgette

  12. Ha! I like that Paul: “faux problem.”

    What if we could see ALL our “problems” as such?! It’s easy in hindsight, but maybe we can take our ability with looking backwards and seeing them as faux problems and apply to that real-seeming ones we supposedly have now.

    What a difference that would make, huh?

    Thanks for that tip, Paul! (And for the apnea alternative. I was wondering if I should feel badly for Russ that his personal life gets broadcasted over the net, but this helpful info is a big plus to that!)

  13. Thank you, Bridgette and Shama, for making me feel more comfortable posting such a freakin’ long story! I wasn’t sure anyone would read it! lol

    And Laura, I’ve had a couple people (including my ex husband) talk to me about Mona Vie, but this was not a benefit I had heard! Thanks for telling your powerful story. 🙂

  14. Shama Hyder says:

    Cleaning on this…; )

    Love how you are such a master of perception–>reality.

  15. Zoe Routh says:

    Hi J

    Hmmm..gremlins – did some gremlin stuff myself today! Love that Psych – K for purging. Then I got my first $700 affiliate referral. Ha! Love this stuff – it is spooky.

    By the way, thanks for the invitation to plug my latest product -but how about you let people know with your affiliate link? You are such a huge supporter, I’d love for you to share in the benefits too 🙂

    If you missed the email I sent about it, let me know, I’ll resend it.

    Zoe
    p.s. I love your relationship with this guy. He must be some kind of pillar to know he is being blogged about so often! LOL My Rob checks to make sure the content on him is white washed enough 😉 Can we get a photo?

  16. Zoe Routh says:

    J – I forgot to mention – Buteyko physical training that teaches people how to breathe properly cures snoring (and asthma and a whole bunch of other things) – check it out! It works!

    Zoe

  17. Wendy says:

    Jeannette, love this post because I’m fascinated by how so many of us automatically leap to the worst-case scenario in our minds! Yes, I do it too, all the time. A minor conflict or “something” will pop up, and suddenly my mind is traveling down the “dark and scary” road like you so perfectly described. A bump on my skin MUST mean it’s cancer and I’m dying. A headache MUST mean a brain tumor. An argument with my husband MUST mean it’s over and we’re getting divorced! LOL I’m not laughing at you but our tendency toward dramatics!

    Of course, your boyfriend did use the word, “deal-breaker” so I can see why your thoughts moved in that direction. Mine probably would have too. Who am I kidding, they definitely would have. I know myself too well.

    Something I’ve been doing for the past few months may work for you too: Whenever I notice my thoughts moving in that “dark and dramatic” direction, I immediately shift to an equally dramatic – but hugely positive- direction. For example, if you’re getting locked into the “it’s over” ideas, stop yourself and create a little mind movie where your boyfriend realizes the error of his ways, surprises you with 10 dozen roses and whisks you off to Paris for the weekend, vowing never to upset you again. I guarantee you’ll be laughing before you’re done. 🙂 Sometimes an active imagination can be a great thing!

    P.S. My husband and I haven’t slept in the same bed for years now. No, I don’t mean we haven’t “slept together” *wink* – but as far as spending the whole night in the same bed, it rarely happens. He’s a TV addict and MUST have that stupid box blaring all night long. I need silence in order to sleep. So he sleeps in the living room with the TV (his other wife), and I get a king sized bed all to myself! It was strange to get used to at first, but now I love it. Just wanted to put that out to you and let you know that “non-traditional” can work too, as long as both of you are okay with it! 🙂

    Wendy

  18. Angie says:

    Jeanette,

    He may just have an obstruction of his breathing passage. It’s a common occurrence where the tongue muscle relaxes at night, falling back and obstructing the air passage.

    You may want to suggest he see his dentist. I work for a dental lab and we fabricate an anti-snoring device that may do the trick. It must be prescribed by a dentist.

    If he finds that’s the case, let me know and I’ll get you the lab name to pass along to his dentist. Most people don’t consider snoring a dental issue, but many people are cured (of that and migraines) through dental appliances.

    I shall now step down off of my soapbox…

    Btw… This post was EXACTLY what I needed to hear today since my hubby has court for our custody battle and it’s not looking good…

    But thanks to your reminder, I’m ok no matter what!

    Isn’t LOA grand????

  19. Paul. says:

    Wendy,

    Not only have you reminded me of saying but have come up with the (simple and fun) solution the saying lacked.

    I remember being told once that “Worry is the gross misuse of imagination.” And those “scaries” Jeanette’s posted about, as you point out, is worrying gone out of control.

    Your simple game of imagining but in a positive direction sounds like fun and perfect for a practised worrier like myself. Thanks!

  20. Peregrine John says:

    How intriguing! About the juice, I mean. As I am trying to cut my triglycerides in half right now, I will definitely explore that and likely give it a go!

  21. Zoe – ??!?! Overbreathing?! I never even imagined that was possible! All we ever hear is that we’re chronically shallow breathers, and we should learn to take deeper breaths. Which I’ve been practicing!!

    I did the test (at http://www.buteykointernational.com) and got 30. (Barely satisfactory.) Have you done it?

    That’s the craziest thing I ever heard.

    I just sent it over to Russ to see what he tests at.

    Huh. Wow!

    Thanks, Zoe! Can’t wait to see where this goes …

    And yes, I’ll go through my file and let you know if I can’t find the affiliate link. 🙂 Muchas gracias!

  22. Angie, yes!! Lab name, please!! Sheesh, I may have to encourage Russ to read this post just because of all the great solutions you guys are offering him!

    Thank you!

    (He used to read religiously, but his work computer was blocked from accessing it a while ago, and ever since he hasn’t been as good about keeping up with the posts. ha)

    Okay, Angie, I’m sending good thoughts your way for the outcome of the custody hearing. Not that you need them, because, as you reiterated, we’re always okay no matter what. And remembering that is exactly what leads to preferred outcomes.

    Thanks for posting, Angie!! 🙂

  23. Wendy, you are making me laugh out loud!! I love it!! The best case scenario imagination leading to laughter, and the solution you found with your hubby and his “other wife.” ha ha!

    One of my clients said to me, “Now you know why our grandparents always had those separate beds.” lol (She does, too.)

    Your solution may be more “traditional” than we realize!

    And honestly, being able to laugh at our tendency to do “worst case scenarios” – what a vibe shifter! That in itself offers relief!

    Thanks for sharing your perspective, Wendy. It’s nice to know I’m not the only one willing to admit to a big gremlin party now and again. hee hee

    Love you!!

  24. Peregrine John says:

    Just got the latest newsletter, which deals directly with the scaries, the ones it’s so hard (for me) to calmly explore and then get over. Bloomin’ brilliant.

  25. Tarielle_au says:

    He, he, he, he……Jeannette this is a great story. I’m laughing because I’ve been sucked into situations like these way more often than I’ve liked. Nowadays when someone is in my face ranting and raving about something or other, the first thing I try to do is take a step back, listen to what’s being said and then form a response. It’s not worth the heartache down the track when you finally realise that the sky isn’t falling and it’s all going to be okay. Isn’t it nice to sit back and realise that we are only human, we can’t be perfect all the time and then have a good laugh at ourselves for being so darn silly in the first place. I also try to remember that the person with the problem should own the problem, and not pass it on to others.

  26. Amy says:

    I’m another person who enjoys her own bed and bedroom. I can’t imagine ever going back to sharing a bed and bedroom (for all night) again! It has to work for both parties, though.
    Also, my mom has sleep apnea, and has had the surgery and still snores. She said the surgery was ridiculously painful to recover from.
    Talk about vibrational cause of everything physical, I heard a couple of fascinating examples of this. These come from one person removed information- one woman had breast reduction surgery and they grew back! She went through this three times! Gastric Bypass surgery, lost the weight and gained it back! My aunt- surgery for acid reflux that was destroying her esophagus- it reversed itself in less than a year. She’s about to have the surgery again by a different surgeon. I don’t think that unless the vibrational cause is addressed, any sort of surgery can do the job.
    So, hopefully, tubal ligation I had last February… 😉

  27. Annette says:

    Two, no, 3, no . . couple o’ things:
    I lived with my boyfriend (who SNORES) for over 4 yrs. When we moved apart, I couldn’t sleep! It was too Quiet! Very odd – I like it ever so quiet when I want to go to sleep. Shows you what you can get used to, huh?
    Mona Vie is as great as was mentioned previously – I had the pleasure to try a few bottles and the results were fast and Very Noticeable! Try some – but make it at least two bottles to get a good idea of what it can do for you. It’s extremely high-quality and there are some knockoffs in the stores, but they’re just not the same!
    Also – as far as the imagination and gremlins are concerned – when I get in those moods, all the good daydreams turn into daymares ’cause I get stuck. I found that if I go with them and make them as ridiculous as possible (i.e. a house fire turns into a roaring, fire -breathing dragon that gets indigestion from eating all that insulation), the gremlins get their say and I get to show myself how silly they really are.
    Thank you, Jeannette, for showing us you do what you teach!

  28. Amber says:

    what if when I allow myself to feel the fears of my worst case coming about, when dealing with a particularly large and ongoing problem, I do not come to the conclusion that I would survive? then what? I get stuck thinking that I’m going to c create something bad just by having fearful thoughts for a few minutes.

  29. Angie says:

    Thanks for the positive vibes, Jeanette! The hearing was postponed for another month (which is a good thing) so I guess we did our job, eh?

    I even turned hubby from being angry about the last minute cancellation to being ok with it. (you know how I looooove my gratitude!)

    Just tell your honey to ask his dentist to send the request to Keller Lab. Like I said before, they can’t be purchased by individuals – it must go through a dentist. I hear great feedback on how they work, so it may be something that can help him.

    Good luck with it and as always, you inspire me!

  30. YES!! Not only is it impossible to screw up (because I’ll have a good time no matter what with my divine higher self, because that is who I Am), but Life is a grand experiment whereby every drama that presents itself (aka the deal broker experiences) brings me closer to The Source.

    Why? because the alternative (fighting what is, depression, negativity, drama, finger-pointing) is really no alternative at all!!

    WooHoo!!

    Loving What Is,
    Kate Loving Shenk

  31. Thanks for your kind words, John. Glad you’re finding it helpful. I’m sending good thoughts your way for finding your power on this topic.

    Yeah, Tarielle, it is nice how a little distance and time gives us such a better-feeling perspective, huh? Being able to laugh about it incredibly helpful, too!

    Thanks for posting your thoughts!!

  32. Amy, you crack me up!! With your string of stories of nonhelpful surgeries, and finishing your post off with high hopes for your tubal ligation! ha ha!!

    Too funny! And a great point you make. It’s one the reasons I haven’t bothered with health insurance, because I am a firm believer that my answer doesn’t lie in a doctor’s hands.

    Annette, thanks for the great tips! I’m sitting here now after reading your post imagining the day that I would actually MISS Russ’ snoring. It’s not inconceivable. Thanks for clueing me into that possibility. 🙂

  33. Good question, Amber.

    (What if when I allow myself to feel the fears of my worst case coming about I do not come to the conclusion that I would survive? then what?)

    This might be a good opportunity to use Byron Katie’s process of inquiry to question those thoughts that are causing you distress. (www.thework.com)

    But I’m also thinking that even death – from my perspective – there is no such thing. That who we are isn’t these bodies, and even after we “die” the essence of what makes us us continues.

    It’s taken a lot of spiritual introspection to come to that conclusion and to be firmly grounded in it, but it’s what I rely on when those thoughts get so scary that it seems like death could result.

    So what? Game over. Let’s go again. 🙂

    Don’t know if that works for you or not, but it’s been key for me.

  34. Angie, you’re a sweetheart! Thanks for the resource and congrats on finding gratitude for a postponement (more time to line up the vibe)!

    Kate – is it any wonder I love you? Nice style!!

    Thanks for posting, both of you. What great company we have here!!

  35. Amy says:

    Just checked out thework.com. This is a website I’m definitely going to spend some time at, thanks for the resource!!

  36. Wendy says:

    Paul, wow I LOVE that quote about worry! How true that is. I’ve got to keep that one. Glad my suggestion helped you, I’ve found that the sillier you can make your positive imaginings, the better. It’s hard to worry when you’re laughing your head off! 🙂

    And Amy, LOL about the tubal surgery undoing itself… yikes! hahaha

    Jeannette – I remember watching those old television shows where couples had separate beds and I always wondered why on earth they’d want to do that? I couldn’t imagine anything more delicious than cuddling up with someone you love all night long. After 9 years of marriage, I totally “get” the separate sleep arrangements….haha!

    Wendy

  37. Anna says:

    Laura:
    Wow! That Mona Vie sounds like the cure all for everything! My friends at work are selling the stuff as well as drinking it. I’ve been looking for a good diet supplement to shed those 5 persistent pounds. Looks like I’ve vibrated it right into my life…I’ll be giving it a whirl. Thanks.

    Jeannette:
    Glad things have worked out with Russ. I like the techniques you used in getting through that little hiccup. I’ve been getting a lot of messages about being friends with the bad feelings first before moving out of and away from them. I like it. I definitely have seen how all things come to pass in my life as well. : ) Everything is a matter staying present and choosing your reality.
    Oh, and my best friend at night is a sound machine (acutally it’s an air purifier that makes white noise, two-fold benefit). I sleep like a baby!
    As always, you are a blessing in my life. Thank you.

  38. Ha – yeah, Wendy, it looks great in the movies. lol Real life – man, give me some ROOM. In fact, there’s a song by Cowboy Junkies – something about although she misses her guy she really likes this extra few feet in her bed. I always liked that song. hee hee

    And Amy, that Inquiry Process of Katie’s is life-changing stuff. I think you’ll like it!

  39. I like that languaging, Anna: “friends with the bad feelings.” Way to release the resistance and step into allowing. !

    I’ll look into the sound machine solution – sounds like a pleasant and easy fix. Thanks for the tip and for posting!

  40. Joann says:

    Jeanette,

    So-o- helpful to see how you worked the process.

    Another suggestion for snoring- even if it’s genetic. EFT(Emotional Freedom Techniques) has had success. EFT, developed by Gary Craig, is one of the new energy medicine modalities.Go to emofree.com and on the right side of page above the word “Testimonials” there’s a search bar. Type in “snoring”. There are lots of articles by practitioners who have successfully used EFT with their clients.

    I’ve been using EFT for a couple of years. It’s really amazing. Lots of other info on the site. There’s an introductory video above the search bar.

    If you or anyone else want more info, let me know. I want to make this available especially to parents and children.

  41. Holy hannah, Joann, I never thought of EFT for snoring! WOW!! What a great idea!!

    Thanks for expanding the possibilities for me! I always thought of EFT for emotional shifts. Huh. Brilliant!

    I’ll check it out now …

    Thanks, Joann!!

  42. Michael says:

    This is great! If we can view ‘scaries’ as just a thought and know there are a TON of empowering thoughts we can substitute in after looking at the scaries and not really resisting them, we can have all sorts of openings for power in our lives.

    m|p

  43. Joann says:

    Jeanette,

    As EFT has evolved, people are having more and more success with lots of physical issues. Most issues have an emotional component. I couldn’t believe there are 10 pages of articles on snoring! What’s great is usually you can find a situation to somewhat match yours and the have the scripts that were used – which of course can be adapted.

    EFT is a natural fit with Law of Attraction. More and more practitioners are combining the two. And it’s such a great self-help tool – for reinforcing what we do want to create and getting rid of those “yeah buts” as they arise in the moment. If you’re interested in doing something on this, I’d be happy to share what I know. (Just got my EFT Level 2 Certification.) Maybe a weekly blog with tips. Or a “yeah but” of the week .

  44. Flavia says:

    Thank you so much for this beautiful blog post.
    Yes when I moved in with my hubby I had been through a rather stressful situation and couldn’t sleep easily. Because he was snoring it was even harder for me to fall asleep. In time as I came into alignment with myself again and made peace with his snoring….magically (not really) his snoring stopped. His still snores but very rarely and I sleep so well I don’t even hear other, much loader noises.

    As always it’s all about alignment, part of which is making peace with what is.

    Love,
    Flavia

  45. Toni says:

    Jeannette – you are wonderful. Sending lots of warm and happy thoughts your way 🙂 All is well.

  46. Indeed, Michael: all SORTS of “openings for power”!!

    Thanks for the additional info, Joann. My clients have always raved about EFT, and I recently outsourced my own tapping to John Priest, but I think it might be time for me to dive in deeper personally.

    I appreciate the posts from both of you!!

  47. Flavia, I couldn’t agree more! It is all about the vibe. Interesting experience of yours, thanks for sharing it to highlight that the work isn’t so much finding a solution as it is changing the feeling. (Unless the solution itself changes the feeling, of course.) Your story gives me encouragement that there may very well be a day when I don’t even realize Russ snores.

    (Okay, I just laughed out loud thinking how natural an outcome that would be if we were in separate bedrooms. ha)

    And Toni, thanks for the warm happy thoughts! It’s nice to be getting zapped with some good stuff from your end of town. MUCH MUCH appreciated, my friend!

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