I wondered about it, and the only reason I can figure it was so good was that I ate refried beans without judgment.  Normally I order black beans, but today’s dish came with refried.

I used to think refried beans were worth skipping.  I mean, “everyone knows” black beans are better for you, so that’s what I always went with.

But the refried beans were soooo good!

Which is easy to experience when I’m choosing what I want and enjoying it in the absence of thinking I shouldn’t be or it’s not good for me or whatever other thoughts spoil the party.

It made me think of a recent client looking for reassurance on a big decision about a breakup.  Her head was spinning about whether she was taking the right road.  The problem is when you’re flowing that much doubt, no action will serve you.

Whether you’re ordering lunch, engaging a coach, saying “I do,” signing a mortgage, taking a job or whatever action you’re taking, it’s best to do it without mixed vibrations.

Do it with alignment.

Now that’s a good bumper sticker: “Deliberate Creators do it with Alignment.”  :)

That’s how we want to do it – whatever it is.  All the way on board with it.  Whichever path we travel doesn’t matter as much as the feeling behind it. We handicap our success when we entertain second thoughts or question whether we made the right choice.

No one wants to start something with one foot in and one foot out.  Not you, not your boss, not your boyfriend.  Doubts and second thoughts keep us from a really good time.  Whether it’s a job, a marriage, a move, a medical treatment, an exercise plan, or even just a meal – if you’re gonna do it, get lined up with it.

How to do that?

I think the reason it happened at lunch today was because I’ve been practicing judgment free living with food.

I realized a couple months ago I had truly arrived at this judgment free place when I opened the cupboard for a snack and chose almonds over Oreos without any congrats to self for picking the “healthier” option.  It used to be when I reached for almonds I would think “Oh look, I’m making the healthy choice!” but this day I reached for almonds and felt absolutely no pride or satisfaction whatsoever!  Almonds were no different to me than Oreos. They were equal in my mind and in that moment I knew I had achieved a milestone in judgment free eating!

When you’re getting conscious about lining up with a big decision, here are a few tips for alignment:

1. Free to Choose

Start off by giving yourself complete permission to choose.  It’s harder to get genuinely excited about something that you’re not really free to pick or to leave behind.  You can embrace the freedom to choose by remembering that it isn’t even your action that matters – it’s your vibration.  That should give you more wiggle room in feeling free to choose.

2. Identify Easier Path

As you consider options, feel out which one will be easiest to align to.  When I was deciding whether to quit my corporate job or build a coaching practice on the side while keeping the paycheck, I knew quitting would activate financial fear.  But I also knew finding the good vibe while spending the majority of every day doing something I hated was a bigger challenge.  Quitting was an easier path to manage then staying.

3. Spotlight Why

Before you take the leap, remind yourself why you’re choosing this.  Get a good spotlight on reasons why you believe this is the way to go.  ”My heart tells me this is right.”  ”This is the best investment I could make in myself.”  ”I believe these doctors know what they’re doing.”  ”They probably don’t even use lard in refried beans any more anyway.”

4. Attention Forward

My grade school teacher used to say “eyes forward.”  Meaning, don’t pay attention to anyone else – eyes up front.  That works here, too, in terms of get your attention on what you want, on what you’re creating.  We don’t let our mind linger on negative what ifs or heavy doubts or allow it to second guess or make up ugly stories.  We commit.  We CHOOSE it to be the right thing.  And if we need to remind ourselves on occasion why we chose it, then we do so.

If your better feeling thought is to remember that it all works out, and it’s not such a big deal anyway, and there’s no such thing as failure, and everyone has to have a starter marriage, after all, … whatever thoughts feel better, use them to strengthen your alignment.

Remember: your action doesn’t matter nearly as much as your vibration does.

I’m all for taking the actions that make it easier for us to flow a good vibration and to expect good results.  I set myself up for easier beliefs about success by taking strong actions regularly.  Once you choose an action, though, as my favorite new reality host would say, “Make it work.”  (I just discovered Project Runway this fall!  Love you, Tim!)

I’d love to hear from you guys your tips for getting lined up.  Please share your thoughts and suggestions in the comments.

PS – even if you’ve already made your decision it’s not too late to line up with it retroactively.

I’ll offer my two cents below, but I know from experience that some folks hear it better with someone else’s words.

So what does alignment mean to you? How would you explain it to someone who didn’t know what it is to deliberate creators, and why is it important?

Looking forward to your brilliant descriptions!

In the meantime, here’s mine:

I learned the term from Abraham, so when I say “line up with it” or “check your alignment,” I mean pay attention to whether your thoughts and feelings are taking you where you want to go.  Or simply: feel it now.  Feel what you want now.  That’s alignment.

Your thoughts and feelings (i.e. your vibration) are an instruction/signal to Universe (or whatever you call higher power) that says “more of this.”

It has to send back whatever you’re offering vibrationally.

So if you want financial abundance, but you’re dwelling on financial lack (by entertaining worries about how to pay the bills, or frustrated that you don’t make more money, etc.) then you are not aligned to abundance.  Rather, you’re lined up with lack.  And that’s what you get back.

So lining up with what you want can be as simple as feeling now how you would feel then.

I’ve heard Abraham describe aligning as the same as “getting in the vortex.”  Although more industry jargon may not be helpful in understanding the concept.  ;)

Let’s hear your thoughts on what alignment is!

(I rarely post these pieces online, but when my inbox is filled with folks requesting links, asking for permission to repost, and wanting to share comments, I make an exception.  Thanks for the love!)              

                                * * * * * * * *

It’s true that strong desire and strong belief are essential components to swift manifesting, but is it possible for our desire to become so strong it actually holds up the process?
 
It’s easy to conclude that’s the case, when seeing that things we want the most also seem to be the things that take the longest to arrive.  And things we care about the least get here the quickest.
 
It’s enough to make any good creator ask, “What the hell?!” 
 
That may have been my client’s question this weekend when I asked her to get her attention OFF of her desire and focus on something – anything – that felt good instead.  Because her long-held desire was no longer a friendly topic.
 
Sometimes we get to the point where our desire is infused with a yearning, frustrated or impatient type energy that clouds the picture.
 
Anyone else not felt that at some point in time?  Where you want something SO BAD you’re ready to shoot daggers at the next person who has it?  Or you want to wring the neck of the next LOA guru who says all you have to do is allow it in?
 
I’ve been there.  And that’s how I know that feeling that way does not help.  It does not help to want something that bad.  Because by the time you get to that state of mind, you’re flowing contrary energy that slows Universe’s delivery of it to a crawl. 
 
This is where it’s helpful to recognize it is possible to hold strong desire for something while still being happy without it.  To want something while not needing it to unfold in order to be satisfied.  To have a big fat dream way out in front, but at the same time finding complete delight and fulfillment with life as it is now.
 
That’s what it’s like to want it good.  Pure, clean desire; free of doubt, fear, frustration and attachment.  It’s the space of enjoying what is, while still having a conscious recognition that what’s coming next will be even more fabulous!
 
There’s no “pushing against” what is, and very little (if any) time spent noticing it’s not here yet. 
 
Because it doesn’t matter if it comes or not – life is good anyway.  There’s no need for it to happen, because we’re not making the realization of the desire conditional upon feeling good.  We feel good now!
 
As shared by Abraham, pure desire feels confident and positive, as in: “I want it, I got it, it’s coming, I know it.” 
 
While yearning sounds like: “I haven’t had it, but I’ve really wanted it, and I’ve done the work, and it hasn’t come yet, but I know it will, I know it will, I know it will, … it hasn’t come yet, I’ve written it down, I’m really getting sick and tired of this, I’ve wanted this my whole life, it’s not fair that he has it …”  (One of my all time favorite Abe tracks!)
 
Wanting something with pure desire feels fresh and light and free and frisky.  When you talk about you get a rush that feels good.  When you want something you’ve begun to doubt, it feels like work. 
 
When you feel that “work” feeling creeping in, it’s time to remember to want it good, not want it bad.
 
My favorite way to redirect when I’m wanting it bad? 

Remember that there’s plenty going right already.  There’s more to enjoy in this present day reality than I could even count.  But I’ll start counting anyway just to prove it to myself: strawberries, cats, Bella Foster artwork, chocolate, Christmas lights, Michele Woodward wisdom, warm purple sweatshirts fresh from the dryer, pink sparkly pens, modern plumbing, nice neighbors … get the idea? 
 
When we combine this genuine and strong appreciation for life as it is right now with the pure desire of what’s caught our fancy next, we’re home free.

Which is why I was so excited when Michele Woodward accepted the invitation to guest post.  Enjoy!

We talk about being “in alignment” quite frequently, don’t we?  And sometimes the explanation of being in alignment sounds more like the Official Rules for playing Twister, than something simple and easily understood.

When I think of being in alignment, the first thing I think of is knowing my priorities.  Yep, knowing what’s important to me — and just how important it really is — gives me the ability to focus, set my intention and, maybe most important, give appropriate energy in respect of that priority.

Example?  Okie doke.  I met with my coaching client Julia this week.  She’s a medical doctor who stepped out of her residency and professional life when she and her resident husband had their first child.  She is now 45, has four children ranging from 7 to 14, and is getting a divorce.  She asked for my help in managing her time better — needless to say, her life is a bit chaotic.

As we talked, I jotted down some notes.  Finally, I said to her, “Here’s what I heard are your priorities,” and I listed them for her like this:

1.  Be an involved, steady, centered parent

2.  Be spiritually fed, and curious

3.  Tend to your health

4.  Explore your professional options

5.  Manage your divorce proceedings

Eyes wide open, as if I were saying sooth, she said, “Yes! That’s it exactly!”

(Which was good for me, because I could have been completely wrong.)

One of the things I Know For Sure is that each and every day I have 100 units of energy.  I can’t take from yesterday, because those are all spent.  And I can’t borrow from tomorrow, because tomorrow gets 100 of its own.  All I’ve got is 100… today.  And it’s how I use them that makes all the difference.

So, I explained this 100 Units idea to Julia and asked her to look at her priorities and figure out how she’s allocating her energy.  Eye opener.  No wonder she feels pressed for time — because she’s putting energy units on things that aren’t even remotely her priorities.

With nothing more than heightened awareness of what’s truly important to her, Julia was able to re-align her energy in the best way to serve her priorities.  She was able to understand where she needs to say no, and where she owes it to herself to say an exuberant yes.  

Plus, now she can be non-apologetic about being in alignment with her priorities.  Rather than beating herself up when she’s helping in her child’s classroom rather than — oh… not folding laundry, or dust bunny abatement, or returning to her medical profession — she can take satisfaction that she’s serving that which is most important in her life, her parenting.

And she knows that her parenting is more important right now than having a job.  Despite the well-meaning folks that urge her to get a job, any job, and quick, she knows that her fourth priority at this moment is to explore her job options.  Which she’s happy to do with an appropriate allocation of energy, thank you very much.

Finally, she knows she has to invest some energy units in managing difficult divorce proceedings. Which is hard. Boy, has that taken a lot out of her.  But now she’s able to put the divorce in context of her priorities and not allow any delays or roadblocks or idiocy to take more energy than she’s allocated.  How great! She can step away from the pointless, time-consuming drama and just focus on what she needs to do.

Time management problem?  Cured.  In alignment with what’s most important?  Done.  Happy?  Know what? Despite the upheaval in her life, she is.  And she’s growing happier and more confident and stronger every single day. 

All because she sat down and pulled herself into alignment with her heart.  Which has made all the difference.

Michele Woodward — Master Certified Coach, author, speaker and teacher — has the ability to help people get clear about who they are and what they want to do, and to develop a workable action plan to get where they want to go. 

A former White House official and corporate citizen, Michele works with people who want to be more effective in their work, find new work, or re-enter the workforce.  She lives outside Washington, DC with her two teenagers, two puppies and an optimistic outlook.