We often hear advice to choose a powerful manifesting technique and then make it a regular habit.  Even if just for 30 days, something like daily meditation, affirmations, visualization, or gratitude can transform a life when practiced regularly.

• Tony Robbins says, “Results come from rituals.”
• Abraham says, “It doesn’t take more than 30 days to talk yourself into being a perfect match to your dream.”
• Mike Dooley says, “Visualizing once or twice a day for five or ten minutes is ideal.”

Shoot, even I say one page a day, as if your desire has already happened, is all it takes.

And the evidence shows success comes when we make strong commitments and engage regular habits to create that success.  (Like Olympic athletes who train mentally and physically for years, and happily married couples who honor vows to love each other for life.)

But what about when engaging in the ritual or habit begins to feel like a “should” and we find we have to make ourselves do it in order to honor the original commitment?

I experienced this recently, when I was inspired to commit to 29gifts.org to give one thing every day for 29 days straight.  Just seven days in I was already feeling the enthusiasm wane and the resistance grow - of having to think up something new, something that I wasn’t already going to do – to honor my pledge.  As soon as it felt like “pushing” I gave myself permission to unplug (because I know resistance won’t take me anywhere good).

Which has also happened to me with yoga, meditation – even Jack Canfield’s self-love practice of saying something nice in the mirror every night – I have yet to make it to the full 40 days.  (Which is when he said all his negative self-talk disappeared.  I’d love to experience that!)

So while it’s easy to see the benefit of committing to engage empowering habits, how do we balance that when the “feel good” of it dissipates?

I know some of us are really good at powering through that dip in enthusiasm in order to get the benefits that come from regular repetition of empowering habits.

And on the other hand, I know others are so committed to feeling good that they drop commitments in a heartbeat as soon as they feel like “shoulds.”

This is why Wayne Dyer quotes Abraham with: “Nothing is more important than that I feel good” and why Abraham suggests the best marriage vow we could make is something like, “I like you pretty much, let’s see how it goes.”

So my question is, how do you experience the benefits of an empowering habit or ritual while still honoring what feels best (when you don’t feel like doing it any more)?

Is it that rituals are overrated?  Or that you’re able to tap into a stronger “feel good” by honoring the commitment?  Are we experiencing a self-sabotage by disengaging from what we know would work?  Or is there a secret to making a commitment in a way that it doesn’t devolve into a “should”?

Let’s hear it from you experts who are living this stuff day in and day out!

Without good vibes we’ve got misaligned energy to the things we desire (since we only want anything because we think it’ll feel good to get it).  When the energy isn’t aligned with what we want, what we want doesn’t happen.

So feeling good is KEY.

The question sometimes arises as to what to do when we have contradictory “feel goods.” 

For example, it feels good to have a quiet weekend at home, but our sister is expecting us to visit for her birthday party.  Or it feels good to sleep in today, but it also feels good to keep the job that requires a 7 a.m. arrival.  Or it feels good to buy a one-person sauna, but it also feels good to keep the money set aside in savings.

How to manage contradictory feel goods? 

It’s an important skill to hone since feeling good is crucial to successful deliberate creation.

Here are the three “R”s for maintaining the “feel good” when contradictions appear:

• Recognize when a limiting belief may be in play (and get over it) 
• Release yourself from the need of someone else’s approval and acceptance 
• Reveal the deeper the desire (explore what you really want)

1. Recognize limiting beliefs: We handicap ourselves with limiting beliefs all the time.  (Oops, there it is again!) 

Question the obstacles that seem to contribute to a compromised feel good.  Do you really have to be at work at 7 am in order to keep the job?  When I realized my body really preferred to wake up with the sun, I asked my boss if I could shift my schedule to come in an hour later.  He appreciated the catalyst to implement flex hours for the entire department!

2. Release the need for approval from others: It’s the challenge of trying to make others happy that often compromises our own “feel good.” 

Once you give up the need for others love and acceptance (which you do by giving it to yourSELF) then it becomes much easier to follow your path of joy without influence or interruption from others.

3. Reveal the true desire: if you dig a little deeper on seemingly contradictory desires, you’ll likely find a commonality, and with that recognition it becomes easier to choose what’s best for you. 

For example, if I want a quiet weekend because I want to relax and rejuvenate, but I also want to help sister celebrate her birthday, maybe I could combine both by inviting her to the spa with me for a relaxing couples massage. 

Regardless of what option we choose, knowing that compromising the “feel good” is NOT an option is what serves our successful manifestations!

For more ideas about how to get past our most common manifesting obstacles, you’re invited to join me Tuesday, the 24th at 12 pm est on a rare Teleseminar Event where I’ll be discussing this very topic.  Dial 724-444-7444 with call ID 39932 and pin 1# to participate in this free event.  (Or listen online at the appropriate time using this link.)

In the meantime, I’d love to hear your tips for resolving conflicting feel goods.  Thanks in advance! 

To appreciate the unfolding of the manifestation, and enjoy the desire we’re feeling for something that hasn’t unfolded yet.

That sounds great, and from an LOA perspective it makes good sense – but practicing it can be a whole ‘nuther story.

I mean, how do we enjoy being single while we’d rather be in love? How do we appreciate our bodies when we desperately want to drop 20 pounds? How do we feel good about our jobs that we’re dying (sometimes literally) to leave behind?

Although enjoying the unmanifested desire is easier said than done, it is a skill worth cultivating.

Because when we learn to enjoy NOW .. when we don’t lose hold of our “feel good” just because a big new desire reveals itself, we stay in vibrational alignment with that new desire which allows it to manifest more swiftly. Plus it just plain feels good!

So how do we do it? How do we stop hinging our joy and happiness on something happening (or not happening) and learn to be joyful and happy no matter what, right now?

The answer may be right under your nose.

… if you’re a dog lover, that is.

Dogs have this skill mastered, as any dog lover knows. They know all about joy in THIS present immediate moment. For them, there is no “feel good when … ” Rather, it’s ALL good, all the time. 24/7, they are good to go.

It’s time for a walk? Yay!! Time for a nap? Lovely!! We’re eating next? Woo hoo!! The mail is here? Ruff ruff! It’s time to play? OMG!! Going for a ride? wag wag wag

These guys are ridiculously easy to please. Sadie thumped her tail on the floor last night just because I looked at her.

What if we could adopt their attitude? Ed Mills’ said in a recent post that he uses the phrase “it’s all good” to remind himself that everying is right. I like that, and I like even more that a dog never has to remind himself that it’s all good. He gets it. That’s all he knows. What a blessing!

“Think like your dog.”

In fact, those were Martha Beck’s parting instructions to me on my call with her this week.

She meant it in terms of don’t hold it against your boyfriend that he is a callous meat eater who refuses to acknowledge his role in the misery and suffering of millions of animals. Well, she didn’t say it exactly like that, but you can probably tell the part that was her and the part that was me. (My part didn’t sound very much like my dog.)

This came up because I told Martha my current point of suffering was that Russ refused to watch Earthlings when I asked him to. I was frustrated not only because he denied my request without consideration, but also because he’s choosing willful ignorance. I know it doesn’t sound very good vibe of me, but there I was. Frustrated. Resentful. Going from sunny to cloudy and gray in an instant.

She asked, “What good are you doing anyone by suffering?” Is it helping the animals? Nope. Is it helping your relationship? Definitely not. Is it helping you? Uh, big no.

“Then let go of the suffering,” she said. Stop torturing yourself. You’ll make a better contribution when you’re not miserable.

Shoot, I know all this. It’s a little embarrassing to have to be told.

But it is what it is. I’m letting myself off the hook and getting back on track.

And frontloading my schedule with dog time. Knowing that not only will it be good for me, but more time with them teaches me even better how to enjoy the journey.

Enjoying the journey. It’s all good now. Everything is perfect. We are not here to fix a broken world. The world is not broken. We are not broken. We are perfect, whole and complete eternal beings of love, light and joy. Completely worthy and deserving of all happiness, right now, just as is.

(Repeat if necessary.)

Let’s have a good time, huh? Ed’s right. It IS all good. Let’s enjoy the journey, and if you need help, look to your dog. As Doug Autenrieth told me at the international coach conference last month, dogs are the original coaches.

And hats off to whoever had the idea of dogs. That has to be one of the most brilliant manifestations ever!