I welcomed them into my home when I was feeling a bit out of sorts.  Life was zigging while I was zagging, and I felt a bit drained of joy.

I knew the puppies would put me squarely in the vortex again.

Except they didn’t.

(Yes, delicious moments here and there – but not solidly dwelling in it like I anticipated.)

Me.  Puppies.  No vortex?!

That’s unheard of!

But it makes sense.  Because puppies can’t make me feel fabulous.  That’s on me.

Not puppies.

Same thing with this upstairs bathroom remodel.  I thought for sure I’d feel better once that was done.

Except, I don’t.

Instead it’s offering great reasons to feel more of what I already did: not quite right, damage is done, woe is me.

Like, it’s not quite right how the mirror didn’t fit squarely on the wall.  Just like it wasn’t right how someone abandoned a pregnant dog at the shelter.

“Damage is done” showed up with a shower rod drilled too high into the new tile wall.  Just like the damage was done after momma dog spent a few nights in the guest bath with her new pups.

And “woe is me” that I’m stuck with all this demolition and reconstruction in the house, while I try to get work done, not to mention help mom clean up after nine puppies.  Same “woe is me” feeling that my boyfriend wouldn’t help me with these foster pups.

Those vibes didn’t change because the bathroom was redone.

Law of attraction prevents it.

Law of attraction can only bring more of what I’ve been flowing. So until I change my vibrational instruction, it’s going to be more of the same.

That’s why sometimes people remain unhappy despite achieving incredible “success.”  The fame and fortune can’t change how we feel.  In fact, sometimes that just makes it worse because now we have this fabulous achievement and we still feel like crap.  It could lead to hopelessness, if we didn’t understand how the system works.

I can change the a lot of the details of life – but until I change my vibe, I’m gonna feel the same way no matter what else I manage to create.

It doesn’t take incredible success to feel incredible.  It just takes you.  And your thoughts in this moment.

Expecting puppies to make me feel better, or a remodeled bathroom to lift my mood – that was a rookie move on my part.

Just like folks who think being debt free or quitting their job or divorcing their spouse will make them happy.

None of that stuff can change how we feel.  It might seem like it does sometimes … for a while.

But sooner or later your dominant vibration will prevail. And it can spoil even the most perfectly planned parties when that dominant vibe isn’t a good feeling one.

Which is why I’m writing this reminder to myself and others who sometimes fall for this routine.

We aren’t using our manifesting powers to create things to make us feel better. We’re using our ability to manage how we feel to get what we really want – feeling better. (Which also happens to lead to great stuff that makes it even easier to feel better.)

It all begins with how we feel (i.e. what we vibrate).

Let’s make quick work of it and start where it really matters, by cultivating habits of peace, appreciation, enjoyment.  By setting intentions to feel now how we want to feel, regardless of what is or isn’t happening in our lives.

Yes, there’s a time for feeling out of sorts – that’s part of the gig and it is not a problem.  But when I’ve had enough of that, the answer isn’t puppies or new bathrooms or new boyfriends or bigger bank accounts or new jobs.

The answer is to practice some vibration management. To purposely find ways to feel better right here right now.  A new happiness journal, a decision to practice better feeling thoughts (Pollyanna is a great re-inspiration for that), a recommitment to self-care, as well as a reminder to be compassionate with myself in the process – those are my standbys for vibration management.

How about you?  Do you have a particular mantra or question that helps reconnect you to joy?  A process to make peace with what is?

I’d love to hear your practices for managing how you feel without looking to the manifestation of something to do it for you.

If you want professional success, be the person who is successful.  Don’t wait for success to come before you “be” that person now.

If you want relationship harmony, become a person who is already experiencing it.

If you want more money, adopt the mindset of a wealthy person.

I told the story of how years ago when I was manifesting size six, instead of walking around in the world like a size eight, I became a size six.  In my mind.  In my heart.  In my vibration.

I did it by asking questions like:

• “What would a size six girl order for lunch today?”
• “How does a size six girl drive through this intersection?”
• “How would a size six girl answer this phone?”

Each time I asked the question, the answer that came reinforced the vibration of size six.

It turns out that – for me – a size six girl sometimes ordered dessert.  And sometimes she ordered salad.  She smiled more when she was out and about and she answered the phone in a happier voice.  She sat in chairs differently and she walked with more bounce in her step.  She held her head just a little higher.  There was more ease and relaxation in her movements and positions.

Everything I did was as a six, not an eight.

This is helpful to do very consciously because it’s really hard not to “be” what you already are.

When you’re creating something different, you have to be that difference now.

In hindsight I will say that manifesting a size six was a target MISS.  What I really wanted was to feel good about and in my body.  I imagined that would happen as a six, but that was a mistaken assumption.

The person I shared this with asked a critical question: how do you “become” something you “aren’t” yet while still maintaining your authenticity?

As a deliberate creator, it didn’t challenge my authenticity to practice the vibration of what I was manifesting, but I can see how for some people it might not feel good to adopt what feels like a “false identity.”  Like they’re trying to fake it till they make it.

So how do you purposely adopt a new vibration that isn’t evidenced in your physical reality yet?

I’ve got three suggestions:

1) soften it a bit. Changing the wording or the way you think about what you’re creating may help it feel more embraceable.  Instead of “being a millionaire” maybe you could be a person who is increasing their financial abundance?

2) challenge what you “know.” Who says I’m not already happily married to the love of my life?!  I bet I am in another dimension – and certainly I am in my vortex.  So I’m just allowing that other reality into this one.  It’s not that it isn’t true yet – it is.  I’m just allowing that truth to manifest in this reality.

3) read the comments posted here.  I know you guys will have a variety of excellent tips on this question, so thanks in advance for sharing your experiences and thoughts with us!

PS – in case you’re wondering if it worked for me – it did, until I stopped working it.  Once I had good progress under my belt (ha – no pun intended) I stopped the very habits that led to it and eventually found my way back to size eight.  Sure sign of a counter-intention or some sort of payoff in place!  But I’ve also used this technique to help create a thriving coaching practice, a robust membership site for deliberate creators, a sweetheart, homes for foster animals, a profitable and impactful coach training program, a second home that I love, and many more lovely manifestations.

It works when you work it.

Sound quality, comfort, good buttons for mute and volume adjustment – if you spend your day on the phone like I do, you know how important it is to love your headset.

Which is why when my very first and incredibly trusty Plantonics headset fell victim to feisty foster kittens after three years of reliable service, I was super bummed to not find the exact same replacement.

Everything else was crap compared to that beautiful first model.  Not even more expensive models worked nearly as well.

And none of them lasted as long, either.

Which is why when my most recent headset (also a Plantronics) shorted out on Friday after barely five months of use, I was especially miffed about my obviously missing alignment.

Because, as any deliberate creator knows, if I had half a decent vibration going, I wouldn’t be having these issues. I’d be in headset heaven, like those early years.

Or so I thought.

So Sunday I grudgingly shopped for headsets.  Again.

And was pleasantly surprised to see my old model back in stock at Staples!  At least, it looked like my old one.  I was so suspicious that it could really be my favorite that I brought home two other models just to make sure I ended the day with something that would work.

But it was my favorite one from years gone by!  How lucky am I?!  I spent the first hour wearing it on my head just waiting for someone to call.  I love that headset!

Yet, my first thought when my prior one shorted out was that something had gone wrong. Clearly my vibe was off.  ”Bad” things don’t happen when you’re lined up, everyone knows.

How wrong I was to call it “bad” or “wrong,” though!

My fab headset manifestation is exactly what I thought of when a client shared her concern about a kinky vibe that caused her to lose her wonderful job.  And another one whose dream home fell through.  And another one whose online date turned out to be a dud.

Their first responses (just like mine) was to assume that their vibe was off and needed work since things clearly weren’t working out.

But sometimes – it might just be that the crappy headset has to take an early dive in order to make room for the fabulous one that’s manifesting out of your vortex!

Sometimes the jobs get pulled out from under you when your alignment requires something even better to come through.  Sometimes Universe doesn’t let your second best home appear when something even better is coming up.  And it’s not that big a stretch to believe that occasionally when the date doesn’t go “well,” it’s actually good news.

These things we’re quick to label as “bad” or “wrong” could very well be the exact opposite. They could be a sign of things working OUT!  Of things going your WAY!

It’s to be celebrated!

My fab new headset manifestation is what I intend to remember the next time I’m judging my seemingly kinky vibe for something gone “wrong.”

In fact, I like the plan where we assume everything is always working out for us.  It’s a given.

That seems like a good approach no matter the situation.

So the next time you find yourself wondering where you went “wrong” with your vibration, consider that maybe it’s actually the next step to things getting even better.

Parul’s friend asked her to make a phone call on his behalf.

He was having trouble getting their money back from a business they had placed – and then cancelled – a reservation with.  The business owner not only wasn’t cooperating, now he was even refusing to take his calls!

It was a significant amount of money, and Parul’s friend was determined to get it back.  The longer it was taking, the more upset he got.

He had the idea to bypass the unscrupulous business owner’s screening of calls by getting Parul to ring him.

Parul’s a nice girl and a good friend, so she agrees to make the call.  No big deal; she’s happy to help.

And she doesn’t get caught up in the big ugly story of it all, it’s important to note. (Despite the fact that a third of this money was hers.)

Indeed, Parul calls to find a perfectly nice and cooperative business owner on the other end of the line.

Not at all the guy her friend had been complaining about.

In fact, the owner states he’s already refunded the money to her friend, and doesn’t know what she’s talking about refusing to accept his calls.

Long story short: the owner had already returned the money, although it had gone to a different account than the one her friend was checking.  But her friend still maintained his story (even in the face of Parul’s suggestion that the guy was on the up and up), insisting he was in the wrong.

More evidence that we each create our own reality with the stories we tell!

From a vibrational standpoint, it’s easy to see that Parul had no negative charge and thus was able to get much more positive results than her friend who had a high negative charge and thus could only see deceipt and fraud.

Which reminded me how I sometimes ask my ex to take a sick animal to the vet for me.  Because I know he’s got a lighter vibe and more positive expectations than I do – and that’s probably who should handle things rather than the girl who is uptight and fearful.

While Parul’s friend wasn’t consciously aware of the advantage of having someone who wasn’t caught up in the negative story get involved for the resolution, it did make me wonder if any deliberate creators have practiced this “stand in” process?

Have you ever stepped in on behalf of someone who was too vibrationally kinked to get what they wanted?  Or have you ever solicited that assistance from someone else?

I was also wondering what the title might be for such a position: Professional Vortexer?  Fairy Godmother?  Maybe it’s a side job for one of our infamous OutSourcers?

Would love to hear your thoughts …

• have you ever had someone else read a letter that you were nervous about?
• or called in a co-worker who is particularly technologically lucky to reboot the computer?
• or let someone else drive who is gifted at good parking?

I suspect we may be practicing this already in ways we didn’t realize!

(Yes, I can say “nuthouse” after that lunch.  I earned it.)

Literally - they were running around! 

From the restrooms to the fountain back to their table, then to the empty section (where they didn’t stay nearly long enough) before they burst through the doors to make the rounds again. 

In moments like that, I totally get parents who beat their children.

And .. okay, it was probably more like four kids than 14, but still.  It was nerve-wracking.

With their frazzled mom whisper-shouting their names every time they passed, and their dad retreated to the parking lot to spend his lunch hour in peace, no doubt.   It wasn’t fun.

But my lunch date wasn’t phased.  Dad just commented the kids must be full of energy and happy to be here.  And that’s as negative as he got.

(Seriously, dad?  Are you kidding?  What kind of drugs are you on?)

His biggest challenge was sharing a meal with someone ranting about how they should have child-free restaurants, the same way the Disney Cruise has an “adults only” island, and how some movie theaters don’t let you bring in babies.  

(Good ideas for those of us who haven’t developed immunity from screaming kids!)

I didn’t wonder too long how it was he and I could have such dramatically different experiences in the same place at the same time under the same circumstances – until my boyfriend broke up with me earlier this week. 

!!

(If you just gasped and said “what the …?!” – that’s what I said, too!)

But my beau of almost four years was fed up, tired of not getting what he wanted, done with compromise and through with the dissatisfaction he felt in this relationship.

Which was news to me, because I thought we had a pretty good thing going.

Sure, it wasn’t perfect, but it mostly was. 

The parts that weren’t perfect were just my chance – and my responsibility – to clean up my focus (i.e. change my dial).  Not change my partner.

But that was just my version.  Turns out he was telling a different story.

Where he saw indifference, I saw acceptance.  When he felt isolated, I felt independent.  What he thought was “wrong,” I thought was very, very right.

How could two smart and observant people be in the same relationship and yet experience it so dramatically differently?

I think Dani Webb helped reveal the answer on her facebook page the other day.  She asked:

Why is the mindset of lack and/or “it won’t happen” sooooo much easier to be in than the place of abundance and possibility?

It’s a good question.

• Dana Boyle answered that, “We create what we believe, and we believe what we’ve previously created. Until we suspend belief in reality and envision something different we will continue to fall back on old habits and recreate the same over and over.” 
• Laura Gevanter talked about how most of our thoughts are unconscious and habitual.   
• Randy Shreve said, “Negativity, lack, and complaining have become the baseline of our society.”
• I particularly resonated with Karen Fagen’s comment that,  ”It’s not easier it’s just old and familiar.”

How dad can be in the same restaurant with the same screaming kids and still have a pleasant lunch while I thought the manager should blacklist the whole family, is the same reason Russ can be in a dismal relationship while I’m thinking we’re on our way to happily ever after.

The difference is our point of focus and how we choose to perceive things.

And that is a choice.

A choice I made again when the breakup was revealed to me. 

I chose to enjoy the process (although it did take a minute to get there), to be glad for forward movement, and told members of Good Vibe U that I got to practice breaking up in the vortex.

That’s a separate post in itself, but things got so vortexy (with GVU members’ reminders that it’s a breakthrough, not breakup, and that these are sacred days to be embraced, not resisted) that Russ soon saw things how I’d been seeing them.  As perfect.  Not to be changed a bit.  The sort of thing that makes you realize you’d been living a dream come true life.

Yeah, I know that – how could he not have seen it? 

Well, the same way I didn’t see those kids as full of energy and happy to be here.  I dialed in differently.

And thank goodness we each get to choose how we dial in! 

Our point of focus is not dependent on our upbringing, our astrology, or our past experiences.  Although those things can certainly affect us, they’re not more powerful than our ability to choose.  We get the chance to pick a dream come true life or a “This sucks, you suck, I’m outta here” life.

Today, just like yesterday and the day before, I get to choose whether to dial in on “He’s an idiot and an ass” or … something else.

So, what are you dialed in on? 

If it’s what you want, kudos to you!  If it’s a conscious choice you’ve made every day until it became habit, you’re my hero!

And if it’s not, remember each and every day you have the choice to change your dial.

You choose what you want long enough, and pretty soon you’ll happily forget that other settings were even possible.

There are some fabulous folks that give rave reviews to my work – whether it’s the ezine, the Catalyst articles, the blog posts, or the ebooks.  

Which I greatly appreciate!  (Not just because it helps spread the word, but because it’s nice to hear my material is worthy of raving about!)

When I see that happening, I often invite the raving fan to sign up for my affiliate program. 

Since they’re already sending me business, I figure they may as well get compensated for it!  Which sounds good to them, too, since they’re already doing the “work” of promoting Good Vibe stuff – it’s easy for them to keep doing what they were already doing.

So I send them the affiliate link (which I don’t advertise anywhere – it’s by invite only) and they sign up. 

And then something very interesting sometimes happens.

It seems like overnight their authentic, genuine rave reviews turn into something that sounds more like a traditional marketing pitch. 

It’s as if now they’re trying to convince someone, rather than just sharing the love.  Or they’re efforting towards results (trying to make something happen) instead of just enjoying the opportunity to share a resource they found valuable.

It’s like once they’re promoting me for compensation – things change!

(Not every time, but sometimes.)

Maybe it’s something else in play, but part of me wonders if this change came about because money entered the picture. 

• Like, now that they’re getting paid for raving it takes the joy out of it. 
• Or makes it feel tainted or less pure. 
• Or they really really want to see some money come in as a result, so they try extra hard to be convincing – whereas before they didn’t care if you believed them. 
• Or maybe they don’t want to let me down, or really want to contribute to my financial rewards for what they think of as great material.

Which makes me wonder what charge I might still have on money, because if I suspect I’m seeing it in someone else, it’s gotta be part of me, too.

So this is our opportunity to get curious about how or whether money affects us in our own lives.  Would you approach something differently if money weren’t involved?  Or if it were? 

I wonder if I got paid for fostering these animals .. (which some people do!  A friend of a friend makes half her mortgage payment by fostering a couple of dogs from California!) .. I wonder if I got paid for fostering if that would change the way I did it or how I felt about it.

Or blog posts – I’ve seen others writing affected when they started making money from their blog (for better and for worse). 

Or that job I used to hate – the only reason I went was because of the money.  (I think that’s a pretty good indicator of something worth changing in life.  There are simply too many ways to make money than to keep doing something we don’t love!)

Maybe the way you run your business would be different if you weren’t worried about how to make money.  If you were already rolling in it, what would you do or feel different about it?

That’s not only worth thinking about, that’s worth changing now – if you’re interested in aligning to more money, that is.  (Because if you’ve got a negative “charge” on it, you’re repelling it.)

But maybe you don’t care about making money.  And my suspicion (as well as personal experience) is that when that’s the case, you can’t help but make more of it.

Another example I’m entertaining: what if I paid for comments on this blog?  How would that change things?  I’m imagining a couple of things might happen:

• Some people wouldn’t post because they wouldn’t want me or others to think they’re posting just to get paid.
• Others might post who normally wouldn’t have, just to get extra money in their pocket.
• Some might be more thoughtful in what they post, since they might feel like they needed to be worthy of the payment.
• I wonder if the generous love and joy that you guys naturally bring would change?

What a curious thing money does sometimes, huh?

This is an opportunity to get more open (or at least more neutral) about money if we find it’s kinking the vibe at all. 

As usual, I’m curious about your thoughts! 

In fact, should we do an experiment?  It would be easy to Paypal $1 to every poster (if you include a real email address where you type in your name) and we’ll see if it does change anything.  It could also be a good opportunity for you to see if money affects how you do things!  (I know a dollar isn’t much, but pretend it is.)

Let the experiment begin!  lol  I’m officially paying for comments on this post!!  oh my gosh.  (And not spam comments.  Those guys still get filtered and deleted as usual.)

This isn’t to bribe you, though – just to see if anything changes once money is involved!  May be interesting, huh?!

Cher’s not usually allowed free rein of the house, since she has been known to do bad kitty deeds.  (She’s actually notorious for it, thanks to me.) 

But I couldn’t catch her to return her to the office.

So I opted for taking the leap of faith that she was trustworthy and would behave herself properly while unsupervised.  (Last time I did that it didn’t turn out fabulously well.)

As I walked away from the chair she was crouched behind, I found myself starting a mental tally of the damage she could do.  “Maybe I should put a blanket on that couch; it might be smart to close the bedroom door.”

And I realized these are not the thoughts nor actions of a person who is feeling trust.

Nice catch on not vibing what I thought was.  (Note to self: clean it up!)

Which made me wonder how many other times and on what other occasions I’ve done the same: saying I felt one way but really not coming anywhere close to it.

Sound familiar?

I’ve seen it a handful of times this last week in others, as well.

Like when my sweetheart said he trusted his son to follow through on filing paperwork for the insurance claim, but when it was revealed the forms weren’t sent, Russ wasn’t surprised. 

(If you really trusted someone to do something, you wouldn’t expect the opposite, right?  That was nothing but nice lip service, sweetie.)

Or when one of my clients said he was confident he would get the job offer, and he then spent the week worrying he might not. 

(Confidence doesn’t rendezvous with worry.)

Or when my computer said a really bad thing the other day (so bad I won’t repeat it), and I shut her down to let her get her head together, then hit the restart button and left the room so she could do her happy & good thing in peace (without interference from my nervous vibe). 

But when I approached the office door ten minutes later, I could feel anxiety growing as I wondered whether I would see anything on the screen or not.  (Luckily, I caught the contrary vibe flowing then, too, and detoured myself before coming back an hour later after playtime with foster kitties, completely forgetting I even had a trouble to start with.)

The point being: we can say the words, but if we’re not feeling the feeling, Universe is getting a completely different instruction from us!

And we know how this stuff works – we get what we’re vibrating (i.e. what we’re feeling.)

So, Cher, I’m gonna do a little cleaning up of the vibe right now before I make the rounds. 

Actually, a person who truly trusted her cat was on her best behavior wouldn’t be making any rounds, so scratch that!

And now I invite you to check in on where you might be saying one thing but doing another, cause I kinda got a feeling I’m not alone in this one.  ;)

Would love to hear your experiences of how you catch the contradiction and how you clean it up, as well!

Last year in a private coaching session with arguably the world’s most loved and well known life coach, Martha Beck asked me this question:

“Are you RETARDED???!”

And with that inquiry from one of my biggest heros, the stigma of the word “retarded” fell away forever for me.

(That might not be a good thing, it turns out.  My neighbors don’t seem to find the word as liberating as I do.  But nonetheless, it is where I am.)

So when I saw a rerun where Kathy Griffin calls Ann Colter a nutbag the other night, I became an instant fan of Kathy and I laugh every time I think about her outlandish use of language in communication.

And am I paying the price for it!  lol

(Hang tight – there is a legitimate question coming up!)

For those of you who aren’t subscribed to comments, you probably didn’t see a couple dozen comments posted from a woman calling herself “victim” on this blog yesterday.  (And THANK YOU to everyone who DID see them and phoned, emailed and tweeted to make sure I was aware!  I’m feelin’ the love!)

For those who didn’t see her comment, here’s an email Kymm Brogan-Senseman in Cordova, Tennessee  would very much appreciate the entire world would read since (she says) she’s contacted the FBI, Better Business Bureau, her local DA, my local police department, Jack Canfield, my alma mater, etc. to warn them about my deceptive practices.

(It’s a direct email received just this morning, which I did ask her permission to share, even though it seemed obvious that would be the case.  It’s edited for brevity, believe it or not):

You are pyscho, I have records of no phone calls and only three emails that keep asking when can we talk. I saved every email I sent telling you when we could meet and then asking for a refund, you never got back to me. And no phone calls after payment. I have already forwarded these records to your PD DEPT along with all email records of our conversations. Knowing now you are a fraud after that whooping lie I am contacting the local DA and then the school you went to, and maybe every paper in every town. Do not underestimate WILL power to turn a WRONG into a RIGHT. YOU NEVER CALLED ME FOR OUR MEETINGS. YOU ARE A FRAUD AND YOU KNOW IT. I am also contacting Jack Canfield to let him know you said you co-authored a book with him. Now I am leary of using him because of his involvement with you. Let see how he feels losing people because of your fraudulent activity. Lets see who else I can dig up. I may have forgotten to mention I was an investigator for a bank and attorneys before I was in medicine. So the normal person you SCAM may not know how or where to find other victims but I DO. I will make sure everyone knows what you did. Hummmm the fraud next door what a concept for your local paper. Make it easy REFUND me. You can tell any story you want to live but that only works when it is for good not for bad.

The obvious question here (since I have phone records verifying an 83 minute session with her on May 14, 2009, emails back from her about how she enjoyed it immensely, and multiple follow up emails with additional coaching & such - kudos to me for being slow to clean out sent mail! and the fact that I let her pay after our session, which isn’t unusual since I operate from a basis of trust instead of contracts) – the obvious question becomes “how did I attract this?”

Not an unfamiliar question – you’ve heard me ask it before (when I got on – and off – the Oprah Show).

And the answer this time is similar: a long term client has a loved one who has been dealing with a “psycho ex” intent on damaging their reputation and lives in every way possible – which means it comes up a lot in our sessions together.  So it’s clear to me where my nutbag (vibe) came from.

But that’s not the question I’m asking the Good Vibe community today.

What I’m wondering about is how we can be of support to someone we love (this is every coach with their client, and also applies to our support of friends and family as well) without activating vibrations we don’t want in our own lives?

Yesterday I shared with a client Martha Beck’s technique (oh my gosh, just realized that’s another client who is dealing with a disreputable person in his life!  Sheesh, I’ve got it activated!) for cloaking or shielding your energy – so only good stuff gets in.

But if I have to cloak from clients, I’m in the wrong business.  I do have a perfect client list that I might do well to revisit since the “healthy and grounded” aspect seems missing in this particular case, but I think the key factor at work in this one was that I activated “unhealthy people attacking us” in the conversations I had with the other client.

When a fellow coach emailed me after seeing her blog comments here yesterday and asked “How do you get this woman out of your life?” I knew the answer instantly: stop focusing on her.  But this morning when I asked myself what I wanted out of today, and the words “It’s DONE” popped up in regards to this situation, my first reaction was “What?!  The fun’s OVER?”  So it’s officially revealed that I’m getting a kick out of this back and forth with crazy Kymm, but … truly, the question stands:

How can we support someone with a challenge we don’t prefer to experience? How do we duck a loved one’s vibe?

Because I don’t want to experience every challenge my clients do.  Nor their wins!  (Hey, I don’t want to be married or pregnant or traveling the world or even apparently a guest on Oprah!)  So …

What’s a good girl who loves coaching folks on all sorts of challenges to do? lol

I always quote Abraham’s wisdom on dealing with negative parents: “Get in, say hi, get out.”  I’m not sure that’s the best answer in this case (although maybe I do let clients entertain less of their story about what they don’t want), and I am starting to feel some other answers coming, but I’m turning this over to you all for the enlightened advice you consistently provide.

PS – can I just say how much I appreciate the love and support I get from all of you?  You show it so many ways: the comments you place here, the emails you send me privately, the votes you cast for Best Coaching Blog, the referrals you send, the reiki you sent!, the trust you place in me to help you with your manifesting, the calls you make late at night to make sure I delete nutbags from the blog (ha!) … I’m in love with you all.   Thank you.

Even you, Kymm, for doing your part to make me more famous than I already was, for giving me fabulous opportunity to explore the ins and outs of real life manifesting with this amazing community, and to discover even more about myself and my energy.  This is what I love most!

I’m laughing out loud at us, Missy B!!  And loving that yes, we can (say that).

This is right in alignment with what I logged in for today …

I’m supposed to be sending out client recaps, and instead found myself listening to the Matrix soundtrack on blip.fm, the (slightly x-rated) Nine Inch Nails/Beatles Mashup on YouTube, thrilled to find @DarthVader on Twitter, reflecting how much I enjoyed Inigo Montoya’s revenge scene in Princess Bride (that I stayed up till midnight to watch), and looking forward to the delicious Ghirardelli treats I discovered at Costco yesterday.

Really?

Is this high vibing stuff??  Nine Inch Nails, Darth Vader, revenge, staying up late, and chocolate from Costco??

Shouldn’t the Good Vibe Coach, or anyone who was properly tending their vibe, wouldn’t it look more like eating organic salads, listening to Mark Romero as she finishes her meditation & yoga routine after a great night’s sleep before heading out to the local farmer’s market on her bike?

Hmm.  It’s making me wonder if I’m handicapping my vibration …

And I have to admit, this judgment around what an evolved and spiritually awake person looks like has the serious potential to reduce my enjoyment level!

This topic is somewhat aligned with last week’s ezine on 12 Non-Spiritual Vibe Shifters, which hit a big chord with readers.  (Thanks for all the great feedback!)  While one person wrote to say “you call that good vibes?”, every other email expressed mixtures of relief, agreement and  amusement. 

(How about that – just got an email while typing this very paragraph from that one non-appreciative reader who giggled in response to the email I sent back.  I had written, “okay, maybe it’s more like ‘better vibes.’”)  If you didn’t get a copy of the ezine, sign up for it now and I’ll shoot it over.

My point being that I think my goal in this space/time adventure is more along the lines of having a good time than it is looking good. 

So I’m going to continue releasing thoughts about what it’s “supposed to” look like and just get better at letting the pure enjoyment lead my way.  Because when we let our thoughts about what it should be like hamper the inherent feel good that’s available in it, we missed the point, didn’t we?

At least I did.  (Guess we gotta know our “point” of it all in order to answer that question.)

Maybe there will come a time when I look back on my music & movie & food tastes and laugh at what used to delight me (I can already tell the mood has passed in the hours I’ve been editing this post), but in the meantime, I’m committed to being open to whatever feels good and remaining true to my promise to make enjoying this go-round my number one priority.

Having said all that, I wonder if there is a case to be made for doing the “higher-vibing” stuff to allow for quicker ascension – or is the “higher-vibing” stuff completely subjective?  And is ascension something we should be shooting for? 

I’m wide open to and inviting alternative perspectives here (especially since engaging dialogue here is one of my favorite “feel goods”)!  So tell me, what do you think?

What I especially appreciated, though, was Esther’s insistence to Abe that she’d cleaned up her vibration on the bus repair people. 

And YET, here she is, despite having done the vibrational work, having exactly the same unhappy experience at the repair shop.

As the story continues, Abraham brings Esther to the realization that she wasn’t vibrating what she THOUGHT she was vibrating.

Whereas Esther (at first) said she was excited to drop off the bus and expected things to go smoothly, when pressed by Abe she realizes she HOPED things would go better than before.  She hadn’t really gotten to the core of the vibe that was driving her negative experience at the bus repair place.

Which is easy to do, isn’t it?

I hear it from my clients all the time: “I’m really expecting this date will go well.”  or “I see my boss giving me the credit (and the raise) I deserve.”

As our conversation progresses I hear things like, “I mean, I didn’t want a repeat experience like LAST week’s date!” or “I KNEW he was going to have another lame excuse for not coming up with the money.”

The contrary vibrational instruction isn’t always that obvious, but that’s what makes it even more worthwhile to check in on the instructions we’re sending Universe.

Because when I say “gorgeous body, perfect health” and yet think things like “big hips, sore throat” … what do I expect Universe to do with that?

If we want to see more progress, we’ve got to be more consistent in sending our aligned vibrational instructions.

Which just means becoming more aware, getting more honest with ourselves, and learning to drop our addiction to past experiences and current realities.  (Unless of course those past experiences and current realities are what we want more of.)

So Esther’s bus repair story has me curious … what are the vibrational instructions you’re sending? 

I realize my instructions might sometimes seem a little bi-polar.  When I’m specifically and consciously talking to Universe, they get pretty good directions from me.  But when I think I’m talking to myself or the walls or the tv, … well, things can get a little spotty.  Like …

• “Could we have one day without cat throwup?”  Which Universe hears as “more feline vomit for Jeannette!” 
• Or “You better not space that call in two hours” which Universe hears as “she’s spacing the call in two hours!” 
• And of course “I hope last year’s shorts still fit” is just asking for trouble.

How about you?  Do  you see a hodgepodge of material you’re offering vibrationally?  Or is it lined up pretty consistently?  

What’s your first thought of the day?  That’s a vibrational instruction.

What do you think about while eating breakfast?  There’s another instruction.

How about when you answer the phone?  Park the car?  Shop for groceries?  All are instructions that the Universe hears and responds to.

I’d love to hear from you, as usual!  And thanks in advance for sharing your thoughts, since we all learn and grow from the exploration.