Targeting Your True Desire

September 1, 2015 | 17 Comments »

Manifest Your True DesireOver the years I’ve met conscious creators who unleashed their manifesting skills on a false desire …

  • Like trying to manifest weight loss when what they really wanted was love.
  • Or working on attracting clients, when their true aspiration is to quit.
  • Or creating blog traffic when what they really wanted was to feel their work matters.

(That last one was my own misdirected manifesting project.)

I’ve written before about how we sometimes get focused on the “how” of what we want, rather than the true desire itself. But it’s worth repeating since this is an easy trick to fall for.

Here’s how to know if your current goal represents your true heart’s desire:

Pretend you got what you thought you wanted.

Now look for loopholes that could spoil it. So that even though Universe could technically say, “Hey, we delivered according to spec,” it isn’t actually your idea of a good time.

If you can think of a way that your intention could manifest but you don’t like it, then you haven’t found your true heart’s desire yet.

My suspicion is that if we’re shooting for anything other than happiness (or something in that neighborhood), our sights are a little off.

For example, when a client tells me she wants to get pregnant, I know very well that’s not what she’s really after. It’s not even that she wants to have a healthy baby, although that’s probably closer to the mark.

I know this is because I’ve helped clients manifest pregnancies, only to have a first row seat for their dissatisfaction or disappointment with the results.

They didn’t just want to have a baby.

They wanted to raise a healthy, happy child in a joyful experience of parenting. They wanted to feel complete and full. They wanted the experience of nurturing and shepherding another soul through the world. They wanted to feel a sense of “family,” or to feel like something important in the world would last beyond them – a sense of legacy, perhaps. Or something more than just “have a healthy baby.”

I’ve seen clients manifest windfalls of magnificent money only to realize that what they really wanted was freedom and joy, pure and simple. Because when they fall ill or discover a betrayal in a key relationship, that’s when they realize money wasn’t what they really wanted.

I’ve helped people lose weight only to be disappointed when it didn’t alter their relationships like they thought it would. They wanted respect, to be appreciated, and to feel desired. That’s a different thing than “losing weight.”

This is why Abe tells us the only reason we want anything is because we think we’ll feel better when we have it.

So if our true desire is to just feel better, why don’t we just focus on that?

Many conscious creators do.

And when “getting happy” is our top priority, lots of other delightful pieces fall into place to support and amplify that happiness.

What I’m saying is …

You think you want a thriving business? Or a committed lover? Or a bank account full of money?

That’s not it.

  • I thought having a thriving business would make me feel successful and at ease; finally able to relax and enjoy life. Didn’t happen – all I felt was pressure.
  • I thought having an attentive lover would be the best thing ever. But it felt smothering! (Stalkers aren’t cool.)
  • I thought becoming debt free would allow me to live how I wanted. (Money can’t give me what I haven’t learned myself.)
  • I thought losing weight would make me feel better about myself. It didn’t. All I wanted was to drop just five more pounds, because surely that would make the difference. (That’s when I had a glimpse of where anorexia comes from.)

So when someone tells me what they want to manifest, I ask how they’re enjoying life right here and now. Because that’s not only what we ultimately are shooting for, but it’s also what helps all that other cool stuff come to fruition.

If you’re wondering how to get happy, that’s what we’re focusing on this month at Good Vibe University. You’re invited to join the party and get full access to the entire Year of the Manifestor course as well as much more at this online gathering for conscious creators.

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17 Responses to “ Targeting Your True Desire ”

  1. susanmarshallva says:

    We have been experiencing technical issues for the past couple of days but we think we have them resolved. If you notice anything strange, please let us know. Thank you for your patience and understanding.

  2. Jen says:

    Oooo I like this! Work backward. Figure out what state you want to experience, then generate that state as often as possible and see what shows up. Danielle LaPorte’s Desire Map stuff is in that vein.

    • Jeannette says:

      Working backward is one way to think of it, for sure! I imagine it as getting straight to the heart of it. Bypassing all the middle “men.” And then the all the icing on the cake manifests itself. 🙂

      This is the heart of conscious creation work, isn’t it? Find a way to feel now how you would feel then – and you’re home free.

      Thanks for chiming in on this one, Jen! 🙂

  3. Elle says:

    You nailed the pregnancy thing on the head, Jeannette. That is what is really wanted.

    This post hits home. I now understand how this is actually pre-paving. Feel it and then, as Abe say. I have noticed this myself, especially lately. I noticed that those who are happiest, most content in the now get pretty much everything their heart desires. I’d like to join this category, and one way to do so is appreciating the heck out of things, which will lead to feeling good and then manifestation.

  4. Jacqui says:

    Yes! This resonates. I realise that if I focus on how I want to feel, I will have to let go of the how, and that feels scary – like I am procrastinating or should be making something happen.

    When I did my coach training I looked around at what everyone else was creating and somehow it doesn’t seem like that’s what I want – I don’t have the inspiring vision around what I want. Actually, finding a job with a vibrant workplace and exciting work feels better to me. But the comparison thing…. Everyone is after a six figure online biz so surely I should go for that too? Well, not necessarily, and definitely not if my inner guidance isn’t quivering with excitement. Actually, not really freedom. I value it, but think the others are more valued for me, so I made the mistake of thinking I should want complete freedom (which I made mean I must be a coach) when actually I feel good if I think about the structure of a job or workplace where I get to be as a coach, using myself in that way, so that is what to trust – not what others are saying they value.

    So really what I want is to belong to something bigger than me, with amazing heart centred people and deep connection. To have integrity, to live from that place. Love, integrity, contribution, purpose, excitement. That’s what I want. I have to trust and surrender and let the U handle the details (control freak alert!)

    Thanks for helping me get clear. I already feel those things, just by focussing there! So cool 🙂

  5. Mia says:

    (I wrote a comment yesterday – it was online but seemed to have gotten deleted again …?)

    I like this reminder of focusing on the essence of your desire, Jeannette.

    From your example with the women wanting to manifest pregnancies / healthy babies: Would you recommend to focus on something else instead, e.g. “feeling a sense of ‘family'” or “feeling full and complete” or “nurturing and shepherding another soul through the world” – and how would you go about manifesting something “abstract” as this? Any practical tips?

    Or would simply being happy take care of all of that anway?

    Thanks for the inspiration, just what I needed!

    • Jeannette says:

      Sorry about that, Mia. We had a couple of tech changes in the works this week, so there was some unusual weirdness happening.

      If I were someone who wanted to manifest a healthy baby, I would ask myself these two questions:

      Why do I want that?
      How will I feel when I get that?

      Answers to those questions will help reveal the true essence of the desire, and that’s what I would focus on.

      And YES, I believe you’re 100% right in saying that being happy will cover it all!! That in itself would be a very powerful focus/project. 🙂

      • Mia says:

        Thanks, Jeannette! 🙂

        Those examples you gave really resonated with me, especially: “Feeling a sense of ‘family'” or “nurturing and shepherding another soul through the world”.

        If I wanted to manifest this as the essence of my desire, couldn’t I just be open to “how” that might show up for me – which might be a baby/kid or or not?

        Or do I have to dig even deeper and find out what’s behind those desires, too …?

        You know, one of my biggest wishes since I was a child was feeling part of a loving (big) family. Finding support, sharing love, taking care of each other, etc. However, my family is only very, very small. Having kids doesn’t seem to be possible for me any longer, so how would I go about manifesting “a sense of ‘family'”? Is that even possible?

        What I don’t seem to get is how to focus on those desires in a practical way.

        Oh, I hope this comment is not quite as confusing as this feels for me. 🙂

        Hope to learn more!

        • Jeannette says:

          Yes, EXACTLY, Mia!! “Be open to the ‘how'”!

          Because here’s the thing … Universe knows the best way to deliver it. There are some folks who might have kids or be part of a big family but have NO sense of connection or family at all. They might experience it much better in some other way. Like, wow, what I saw at my cousin’s funeral who was a pilot for Southwest … those guys have a sense of connection like I’ve rarely seen before. (Southwest even paid for the whole family to fly in for his funeral!) Military guys experience it a lot, too, from what I hear. And I felt it when I lived in Rose Park for 16 years – there was a strong sense of unity in that neighborhood like I’ve never experienced before. But I also feel it in my animal rescue community, and also at Good Vibe University. I just read about it this morning in this race review:

          Wherever there’s a mutual passion that brings people together – that could deliver that desire for a sense of “family,” perhaps.

          But again – we don’t have to know HOW. All we have to do is feel it first and Universe has to figure out how to match it. 🙂

  6. Ramuz Temam says:

    First of all I would like to appreciate your great effort to inspite us and unlock the power within us.I am an Ethiopian working in an insurance company.for the last three years I have been reading a lot of books related to LOA I can say I am addicted in reading about it but I can not change my life situation as my expectationwould you please help me in this regard ? Thank you so much!!j

    • Jeannette says:

      This is exactly why I created a personal rule for myself, Ramuz – and that was to practice at least ONE THING from whatever book I learned. That helped me close the “knowing – doing” gap and made sure that I was implementing at least some of the wisdom I was picking up in my studies.

      I’d suggest that to you as well, since it sounds like you’re well-read, so you probably have plenty of things to pick from in choosing what to put into practice. 🙂

  7. Mia says:

    Thank you, Jeannette – I’m glad I understood this correctly.

    If only “All we have to do is feel it first …” wouldn’t be so difficult for me … 😉

    I wish you had an activation vibration text about feeling a sense of family or connection or friendship, etc. (Do you??)

    Anyway, I truly appreciate your insights, as usual! 🙂

    • Jeannette says:

      This is one reason why muggles don’t do it! lol It is an art – or at least a skill worth practicing. But the good news is it gets easier with practice. 🙂

  8. Tim says:

    This struck a chord: “I’ve seen clients manifest windfalls of magnificent money only to realize that what they really wanted was freedom and joy” – The lure of money is a great distractor, when it’s freedom most people are looking for and this can be a large spanner in the works.

    • Jeannette says:

      Yes, so many of us think money would solve our problems, but the truth is we get what we vibrate no matter how much money we have at our disposal. This one’s worth getting a handle on sooner than later.

      Thanks for reading and for commenting, Tim. 🙂

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