Targeting Your True Desire
- Like trying to manifest weight loss when what they really wanted was love.
- Or working on attracting clients, when their true aspiration is to quit.
- Or creating blog traffic when what they really wanted was to feel their work matters.
(That last one was my own misdirected manifesting project.)
I’ve written before about how we sometimes get focused on the “how” of what we want, rather than the true desire itself. But it’s worth repeating since this is an easy trick to fall for.
Here’s how to know if your current goal represents your true heart’s desire:
Pretend you got what you thought you wanted.
Now look for loopholes that could spoil it. So that even though Universe could technically say, “Hey, we delivered according to spec,” it isn’t actually your idea of a good time.
If you can think of a way that your intention could manifest but you don’t like it, then you haven’t found your true heart’s desire yet.
My suspicion is that if we’re shooting for anything other than happiness (or something in that neighborhood), our sights are a little off.
For example, when a client tells me she wants to get pregnant, I know very well that’s not what she’s really after. It’s not even that she wants to have a healthy baby, although that’s probably closer to the mark.
I know this is because I’ve helped clients manifest pregnancies, only to have a first row seat for their dissatisfaction or disappointment with the results.
They didn’t just want to have a baby.
They wanted to raise a healthy, happy child in a joyful experience of parenting. They wanted to feel complete and full. They wanted the experience of nurturing and shepherding another soul through the world. They wanted to feel a sense of “family,” or to feel like something important in the world would last beyond them – a sense of legacy, perhaps. Or something more than just “have a healthy baby.”
I’ve seen clients manifest windfalls of magnificent money only to realize that what they really wanted was freedom and joy, pure and simple. Because when they fall ill or discover a betrayal in a key relationship, that’s when they realize money wasn’t what they really wanted.
I’ve helped people lose weight only to be disappointed when it didn’t alter their relationships like they thought it would. They wanted respect, to be appreciated, and to feel desired. That’s a different thing than “losing weight.”
This is why Abe tells us the only reason we want anything is because we think we’ll feel better when we have it.
So if our true desire is to just feel better, why don’t we just focus on that?
Many conscious creators do.
And when “getting happy” is our top priority, lots of other delightful pieces fall into place to support and amplify that happiness.
What I’m saying is …
You think you want a thriving business? Or a committed lover? Or a bank account full of money?
That’s not it.
- I thought having a thriving business would make me feel successful and at ease; finally able to relax and enjoy life. Didn’t happen – all I felt was pressure.
- I thought having an attentive lover would be the best thing ever. But it felt smothering! (Stalkers aren’t cool.)
- I thought becoming debt free would allow me to live how I wanted. (Money can’t give me what I haven’t learned myself.)
- I thought losing weight would make me feel better about myself. It didn’t. All I wanted was to drop just five more pounds, because surely that would make the difference. (That’s when I had a glimpse of where anorexia comes from.)
So when someone tells me what they want to manifest, I ask how they’re enjoying life right here and now. Because that’s not only what we ultimately are shooting for, but it’s also what helps all that other cool stuff come to fruition.
If you’re wondering how to get happy, that’s what we’re focusing on this month at Good Vibe University. You’re invited to join the party and get full access to the entire Year of the Manifestor course as well as much more at this online gathering for conscious creators.