Bridging the Manifesting Gap

bridgeHere’s a place I suspect we’ve all visited at some point or another; the place between where we are and where we want to be, aka The Manifesting Gap.

It’s the place between recognizing a new desire, doing the manifesting work to bring it about, and yet not experiencing it in our physical reality.

Nothing’s changed; nothing’s happening.  For some, this is where it starts to feel bleak.

Although I’ve written on this subject before, it’s worth repeating how to handle this gap.

These are the two questions I usually get from those who are frustrated while hanging out in the gap:

  1. At what point do I throw in the towel?  I mean, it’s been 6 weeks (or months or years) already – how long am I supposed to keep doing this?
  2. What am I doing wrong?  I must be doing something wrong, since nothing’s happening!

This post addresses the first question; a follow up post will spotlight the second.

Here’s what I know about the law of attraction: it doesn’t take long for things to start happening.  Patience is not a required virtue in deliberate creation.

So if you’ve been at it for six weeks and still nothing’s happening, I’m guessing one of two things is afoot.

Either you’re not seeing what is happening (blind to the evidence – which is easy to do when we’re focused on the “problem”), or you’re simply not dialed in vibrationally like you think you are.

This is time for an evidence check as well as a vibrational assessment.

Vibrational Assessment:

Someone who thought she was doing all the right vibrational things to call in her sweetheart realized (after I asked) that in between her pray rain journal entries and sleeping on her side of the bed next to a closet that was kept half empty for her incoming guy, she was feeling unhappy about her solitary life .  (For the record, being unhappy is not aligned to the happiness she knew she’d feel once in her sweetie’s arms.)

No, you don’t have to get it 100% dialed in on the right vibe before you can expect results, but know that if you’re still largely sitting on misaligned feelings (outside of short manifesting techniques), Universe is answering your dominant instruction.

And I know how easy that is to do.  Esther does it, my first LOA mentor coach does it, I do it … you’ve got good company.  No need to feel bad about it!  But you can clean it up.

For clients who tell me they really ARE in vibrational alignment with what they want, and yet nothing’s happening, my response is, “Okay, so what’s the problem?”  (Because if we’re really feeling it now, we no longer need that thing to happen.  It becomes a moot point.)

Inevitably they explain the problem (there always is one, or they wouldn’t have hired help for it).

And guess what?  In explaining the problem, they reveal their lack of vibrational alignment.  Because if were feeling now how we would feel then (which is what vibrational alignment is), we wouldn’t be feeling the “problem,” right?

Rather, we’d be happy or feeling good or free or secure or whatever else our desired result would elicit.

So this is a reminder to get real with ourselves about what we’re truly flowing vibrationally.  (Boy, how often do you hear me say “get real”?!  Not often!)

Second, as mentioned, the issue could be more of just not seeing what really IS happening.

Evidence Check:

If you’ve seen TED speaker Michael Shermer show the perception video based on David Simon’s research, you know how easy it is to not see something that’s right under our noses if we’re not specifically looking for it.  (Email me for the video clip – it’s classic!)

I once heard a friend complain about lack of support in her life, after she had just finished recapping how her neighbor let her borrow his car, her bishop offered financial help with her son’s medical expenses, and her employer agreed to flex hours.  Uh … lack of support?!  You’re drowning in it, girlfriend!

I’ve done the same thing myself: particularly attuned to evidence that Russ does NOT respect me, when someone else can easily see all the ways that he does.  It’s a pretty fascinating phenomenon.

Which you can put to work on your behalf, by simply intending to see the proof that things ARE going your way; that things ARE happening.

We get what we look for, so if you can help from dismissing the signs you think are too small to count, you’ll be well on your way to letting in the “bigger” signs as well.

Stay tuned for the second half of this post later this week, and in the meantime, you know

I’d love to hear your thoughts on this popular topic!

  • May 18, 2009
  • jennifer says:

    bang on!!! and thanks for posting this, as the feeling of waiting is really the hardest part. and i would like a link for that video clip mentioned, if you don’t mind 🙂
    great post, jeannette… as usual 🙂

  • Barb says:

    Please email me the link to the TED video. 😀

  • Susan says:

    This was a great post for me at this time.
    What’s my problem ? It’s taking too long. So what am I getting ? It’s taking too long.
    So simple isn’t it !!!!

  • Jonathan Lockwood says:

    I find this to be quite true: “Either you’re not seeing what is happening (blind to the evidence – which is easy to do when we’re focused on the “problem”), or you’re simply not dialed in vibrationally like you think you are.”
    I have to keep reminding myself to “stay awake!”

  • You and me both, Jonathan! ha
    Thanks for chiming in. 🙂

  • Thanks for that, Gillian!

  • Gillian says:

    Good post! I think the trouble with the manifesting gap is that most of us are so tuned in to notice, see and feel what isn’t working in our lives. This is a subconscious habit that has to be addressed and dissolved first, because even if we think we are vibrationally aligned to our desire, our subconscious thought patterns are so much more powerful, because it has years of momentum. We need first to find a way to break that momentum of thinking, seeing and noticing what is wrong in our lives, because as jeannette says, the universe responds to the most dominant vibes and we are mostly not aware/conscious of these dominant subconscious vibes. To me the most important lesson is to learn to be content with what already is. Just be at peace/happy with your current circumstances, because without peace and acceptance with your current reality, no body can hope to create a better, fulfilling life. In my opinion that is the thoughest lesson in the manifesting game: breaking that momentum of lack-generating consciousness, rewiring your brain to think new thoughts and just LEARN to be happy with your life as it is. I am just getting the hang of it and learning how to be at peace with what is. As I have mentioned before, I do it with mantras. Mantras are a way to shift your subconscious and raise your consciousness. They are vibrational sounds, as we recite them with time, all other “lesser” vibes get absorbed by the principle contained in the mantra. So if you for example recite the peace mantra “OM SHANTI OM”, after a certain time the mantra will overrride and absorb any vibration lesser
    than peace and the vibration of the mantra becomes your dominant vibe, which is peace. This is how I am breaking the momentum of years of negative thought pattern and lack-generating consciousness.

  • Judiesjuice says:

    Jeannette was kind enough to send me the clip but I cannot open it on my MAC. Does anyone have any suggestions?
    Many thanks!

  • JM says:

    thanks anonymous!
    I actually had checked under both of them, but Jeannette sent me the link….and turns out that I have already seen that footage! It blew me away, so I hope everyone can find it!
    Is Daniel Simon someone else that is connected? Or did you mean David?

  • Anonymous says:

    Check under Daniel Simon

  • Judiesjuice says:

    One last thing. If I find myself getting frustrated, I will ask the Universe to give me a sign that I am moving in the right direction. I have asked for some odd things, like a piece of chocolate or a duck and then I always laugh when it shows up. I sometimes have to remind myself that this is a process and to try to have fun and enjoy the process.

  • JM says:

    Well…the video I got to see was about why people believe strange things. It still deals with perception, but it doesn’t sound like the one you referred to. Please send it to me!!!

  • Susan says:

    Clients showed up in the expected format by referral and in new ways – via the web; through a reformulation of people I was coaching and their sessions were being paid for by a third party and by expanding my definition of my practice to include a distance venue that I was acknowledging – finally!- that I was an expert at doing. So by letting go of a narrow definition, I was allowing clients to flow into my practice at exactly the best time. So cool!

  • Judiesjuice says:

    Susan, thank you for posting that. I have tried doing that as well. For example, I mentioned that I intend to get published in a certain magazine. Traditionally, as a freelance writer, you are expected to pitch the editor with your idea. I did that and the editor was interested. This went on for a while (she wanted more info, etc) and then she ultimately decided she could not use it.
    I felt that this was my fault, that I must be holding onto a belief that was preventing me from manifesting this desire. In the meantime, I took inspired action, sent the editor other ideas and other editors ideas as well. No go.
    I later realized ‘Duh, they can also assign ME a story’ and I let all the editors know that I was willing to take on any assignment. They all thanked me but nothing has come up (yet).
    So, I do feel I am allowing the Universe to manifest the goal in whatever way possible. I acknowledge that I AM moving towards my goal. What’s my desired outcome? I just love that magazine so much (I have been a subscriber for years) and think it would be amazing to get published there. I know it will happen 🙂 I just want it NOW. Hee hee!

  • Good point, MissyB.
    While there are times that waiting for something can be a big improvement in the vibration (like if we were coming from a place of not believing it was even possible), that waiting energy can produce it always just out of reach.
    Thanks for joining the conversation!

  • MissyB says:

    One book I recall reading referred to patience during the waiting period. He said what are you waiting for ?! For if you are waiting, you will only produce more waiting.
    Whenever you are hungy, dinner in the restaurant is always delayed. Watched kettles never boil and all that.

  • Judiesjuice says:

    Hmm, perhaps I need to add “to somehow work with Jeannette” on my new moon wish list!!

  • If it’s an eye-opener to YOU, Self Help Goddess, then that’s a homerun for me!! 🙂
    Yes … it IS a bit of a “reality check” to ask ourselves if we think we’re in such great alignment, then why would we be caring whether it’s manifested or not?
    Cause if we were there, we wouldn’t still need this thing.
    And seriously, that last Q&A post has put things in a new perspective for me lately. (And for many others as well based on the emails I’ve been receiving.)
    Someone close to me lost his job in what he believed was an unfair firing, and all I could think was, “Trivial. Try burying your 9 year old today and THEN maybe I’ll get upset with you.” A client today was doing a worst case scenario where she ended up losing her beautiful home, and still I was like, you know what, that’s still pretty freakin’ good. At least your kids can visit you at the poorhouse.
    Our ability (including mine) to skip the things to be grateful for astounds me. As does the opposite – the ability to be appreciative when times are rough.
    Okay, I got off track …
    Thanks for posting, MaryK!

  • Purepotentialcoach says:

    A ‘who/what has helped me today list is a good alignment exercise.

  • susan says:

    It is amazing to note (or not) that as soon as I realized that I was expecting clients to show up in a particular format and released the expectation, clients showed up in abundance.

  • MaryK says:

    I totally agree with Janette above… when I read this I was thinking, “d’oh!” It seems like no matter how long I study the LOA (and I’ve been studying it for years now), I still get tripped up and catch myself focusing on what I don’t want! Ouch. I guess we all do it, though, and it’s definitely a lifelong process, not a one-time thing.
    I can totally relate to the significant other example you gave in the post, Jeannette. I have definitely been guilty of thinking I have lined up my vibration, only to realize that I spend the majority of my time thinking, “Where is he??” I guess that doesn’t exactly feel like what it would feel like if he were already in my life, huh? 😉
    I liked what you said about asking “what’s the problem?” even if the thing hasn’t arrived yet. If we’ve released ALL attachment to the outcome, we truly shouldn’t care either way whether it has arrived or not! Easier said than done, but I’m going to start working on this. Definitely an eye-opener for me.
    As always, thanks for a brilliant post! 🙂

  • Indeed, PurePotential – thanks for sharing that here!

  • Through the (old) expected format, Susan, or a totally different one? Curious minds want to hear! 🙂

  • The coach in me is just itching to get my hands on you, Judiesjuice!! I want to know what you REALLY want in that publishing and that freebie spa trip … and I also want to suggest not speaking with others about how it “almost” or “hasn’t quite” happened.
    But I realize you don’t need that input since you’ve already asked Universe to assist with alignment. Relaxing is the way there. 🙂
    Enjoy the trip, girlfriend!

  • Judiesjuice says:

    I have been focused on two goals for a long time. I intend to get published in a certain magazine and I also intend to go on an all expense paid for spa trip. I have gotten close to both goals and then bam- something comes up. I know this means I am not in vibrational alignment or else these would have manifested already. When I speak with others about this, I usually hear “The timing wasn’t right” or “This isn’t your fault.” I 100% believe it IS my doing or not doing that is preventing these goals from manifesting. I have been asking the Universe to show me/help me get into alignment. I know all we have to do is feel good. I know, I know 🙂

  • Janette, you’ve got to DM me your email address so I can send that clip! You’ll laugh out loud!
    And I can totally relate .. even as I was writing in the post about how I could see lack of respect while others were seeing total respect, I had a hard time remembering what it was they saw. Even after these insights have come (and apparently gone) I still find it a challenge to remember the evidence of respect!
    Why don’t I just do myself a favor (and everyone else reading this) and consciously take us there now: how I know Russ respects me … he finally understands and accepts that I’m not willing to compromise on sleep. That counts. He lets me do a lot of things my way when it clearly is not his way. He is really good about staying out of my way when I do evening sessions with clients.
    And just like that he feels like a good guy again. ha
    Wow – the power of deliberately choosing a better feeling perspective!!
    You guys gotta try this!! 🙂
    Thanks for posting, Janette – and I SO want to send you this video clip!

  • Janette says:

    *smacks self on forehead… again!* LOL – but just kidding, of course, because the wonderful GoodVibeGuru tells us we mustn’t beat up on ourselves… and she’s right 😉
    I’ve been (pretty) successfully realigning and lifting my vibe, and feeling WA-A-A-A-AY better as a result; but the results? I would have said “patchy” – to say the least. Because I haven’t really been looking properly…
    Have you ever watched an adolescent dog whose feet are still too big for his body, frantically looking for the frisbee – while all the time it’s right at his feet because you just threw it badly?
    That’s how I felt reading this – like Source is standing there saying “look, it’s RIGHT THERE in front of you, see??” … and I’m going *pant, pant, where? where? where? where? where? where?* and galumphing all over the place.
    Thank you Jeannette for the gentle reminder to stop looking so hard, take a deep breath and just pick up the frisbees that are sitting at my paws. Magic!

  • Thanks for posting, JM! You know, that TED link you found didn’t include the perception video clip, right? (If it did, please post it!) It’s based on David Simon’s research about how easily we don’t see things right before our eyes (when we’re not expecting to see them).
    You know, your comments are making me think of the value of making peace with what is, so we don’t feel such a “jolt” when reality makes itself obvious. If we could find something to appreciate about our current circumstances then it’s also not such hard work to flow the “right” vibration. Right?
    And then making ourselves “wrong” on top of it all (for not feeling good) – as you pointed out – it’s not only frustrating but also defeats the purpose.
    There is ALWAYS something going right; something working in our favor. Always. Even when we can’t see it, just knowing that’s the case can be helpful.
    I’m sure many will relate to the words you shared here, JM, so thanks for posting and giving us an opportunity to explore it deeper!

  • JM says:

    Thanks for this!! Obviously this means a lot to me at this moment. I think I found the link you speak of, as he only has one link on TED, and it is incredible…but then I spent the rest of my night watching other fantastic TED talks!
    For me…the Vibrational Assessment thing is really rough. I understand that I have recently had some negative vibes around what isn’t going right for me these days. What usually happens is I can maintain the right vibrational alignment for a while, until reality sort of gives me a jolt and I can see all that ISN’T happening for me. This isn’t a place I want to remain, but somehow I end up finding myself in it all too often. The rough part about vibrational alignment for me, is the horrible frustration I feel when I find myself there, because I KNOW better…and yet here I am, once again!
    I like knowing my own power, but when it doesn’t feel like I am getting it “right”, it is horribly anti-productive.
    I am definitely leaning towards this intending to see what is working and noticing this more every day. It is my new hobby!

  • Ooh, Melody, I love that “celebrating any movement in the right direction”! That’s so much more powerful than waiting to celebrate some “evidence” or clear “success” – but rather treating a step in the right direction as cause for celebration – beautiful vibe you’re activating and wonderful fuel you’re giving to your happy ending!
    Thanks for sharing that with us here. Much appreciated!

  • This was simple and right on target. I’ve recently begun to reinforce a habit of celebrating every movement in the right direction. Sometimes I am looking for the answer or whatever I am hoping to manifest in a certain way so when it arrives I don’t recognize it or I am totally surprised. I have learned that it doesn’t work well to give the Universe the “how” just the “what”. When I celebrate any movement in the right direction it attracts more in abundance.
    Really looking forward to part two! 🙂

  • Thanks for reading, Dan! Check your inbox for the perception video clip and let me know if you don’t see it.
    Carol, I love your sensitivity to be able to spot a potential “out of the vortex” question – ha!
    In answer to your question why we do it … maybe it’s because most everyone around us does or perhaps because it’s just old habit.
    Either way, we can make conscious choices to do what serves us and create NEW habits so it isn’t so “easy” to fall into that old way. 🙂
    Thanks for reading and especially for posting, Carol!

  • This post is just what I needed to read right now: “Either you’re not seeing what IS happening, or you’re simply not dialed in vibrationally like you think you are”.
    As I was reading I was nodding my head in agreement and acknowledging that I was doing both things mentioned above–even though I am familiar with these ideas. Why is it so easy to fall into these thinking traps when we know better? (Hmm, actually that sounds like an out of the vortex question…hehe) But I would love to hear your thoughts on that if you have a chance….
    Loved this and looking forward to the next part 🙂

  • Hi Jeannette. This is good information. Thank you. I wonder if you might be able to email me the video clip you speak of in this post. I am sure it will be most informative. I have a few areas I need to sharpen my pencil as well! Thanks again

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