Sunday night I found myself inventing new swear words as I planted grass seed alone while my sweetheart lingered on the golf course instead of upholding his promise to help with the job.
(Responsibility for grass growing and being AWOL with golfing are long standing issues at our house. I know it’s ridiculous but there it is.)
Lord knows how any of that seed is going to thrive with all the resentment it was planted with!
Anyway, in prepping for his return, deciding whether to let him have it now or wait till tomorrow when I’d (hopefully) cooled off a little, I knew what arguments he would use to defend himself. I knew what to say to prove him wrong. I knew how hot he would be that I was getting hot. And I knew that no one was more mad than me. And I knew the downward spiral we were about to take together.
Until he got home. And apologized.
Even seeing how mad I was (too mad to talk) didn’t trigger his defensiveness.
“I know. I blew it. I’m sorry.” He was genuine; not placative.
Even though I wouldn’t talk to him all night, he didn’t return my cold shoulder or shut doors harder than he should. Even when I did.
He simply wasn’t going there with me, while at the same time he didn’t blame me for being there myself.
We’ve never done that before.
You know, you just can’t have a proper fight with your sweetheart when they behave like this.
But it makes sense. Since like attracts like, when my sweetie is peaceful he can’t have an angry lover. Either I have to calm down, or I have to find someone who’ll match my anger. That’s how it works.
The reason I’m telling this story is because I think my sweetie’s response holds a clue to peace.
The only way to end the fight is to stop fighting. To embrace the feelings we want to feel – peace, unity, love – right now, before anything else changes.
Even when someone is slamming doors in our face.
If my sweetheart can do it, I can too. That’s two more joining the peaceful front.
Despite reports of celebration across the nation for Osama bin Laden’s death, I was encouraged by the number of U.S. facebook friends and colleagues sharing their opinion that death is not a cause for celebration.
I can find compassion, and empathy, and peace within me.
In fact, I’m also finding my way to the place where I don’t judge others for doing it different. For celebrating the death of an “enemy.” Whatever floats your boat, I guess.
We don’t have to agree and we don’t have to worry when others have a different opinion.
All there is is for each of us to choose what we want.
Thanks to my sweetheart for reminding me that I can choose love.
This guest post about the power of community was written by Harmony Harrison upon request:
A ring of women stand barefoot and quiet in the center of a large room. All eyes are toward one woman taking her place in the circle.
She’s crying, but also shining, as she swiftly talks through her tears and fears about a crossroads in her life. Should she do this, or that? Should she leave, or stay, or what?
Soft voices pass through the circle, merging together into questions that help her know her own heart.
But these woman haven’t come together just to talk.
They’ve come together to receive guidance on behalf of the one who is seeking answers. They’ve come together to put their spiritual connection to work for the benefit of one of their own.
This is a common scene from one of my spiritual paths, a path I was raised in and that’s dear to my heart.
But it’s not exclusive to any one path. In fact, I found it again just recently on a group phone call at Good Vibe U.
Our own Sarah Seidelmann was leading a group through a divination exercise when Jeannette received some intuitive guidance that completely perplexed her.
More than that, it had the potential to be a pretty frightening piece of personal revelation. One that might induce a bit of closet-hiding in the more timid among us (like me, in the past).
Enter the power of healthy community.
One by one, in a respectful way, the call members spoke up, sharing their insight on the revelation. And word by word, its uncertainty was transformed into pure power.
When I teach intuitive development, one of my main intentions is to see my clients become as self-trusting as possible.
Often this means reducing excessive trust in others, halting our habits of surveying everyone we know for their opinions, and trusting instead what we feel within. It means embracing the “be your own guru” philosophy.
But eventually this comes spiraling back, as all things do when we evolve. And when it does, we not only get to relish the self-trust we’ve developed, we also get to relish the trust in our communities in new, healthier ways.
Healthy community cannot exist without self-trust and a degree of self-reliance. Boundaries are essential. But so is the ability to soften those boundaries and let each other into our hearts.
Here, when we join together, miracles are made.
Intuitive insights come blindingly fast when we seek them for each other. Manifestations and synchronicities happen quickly and easily when we supercharge them for each other. And fun – that all important element in a magical life – bubbles up organically, joyously, when we come together.
The path of personal power is an inner one, true, and it’s very personal, unique to each heart on the planet.
But the true purpose of this power – its ultimate reason for being in our world today – is not just to transform individuals, but to join together in a wave that is healing the world, one community at a time.
I invite you to open your eyes to the healthy community that surrounds you, both in your local life and right here online, at your fingertips.
Join in – not just for the insight. Not just for the faster attraction. Not even just for the fun. But for something deeper, for the nourishment and acceptance and love that are part of this path.
Everything else is just gravy.
Harmony Harrison coaches and teaches with strong intuition, laughter, and shamanic consciousness.
Called the “Wow Coach” by her clients, she midwifes fast transformation into personal power and bubbling joy. For a healthy dose of intuition, visit her blog at www.Intuitopia.com.
From our Good News about Sucky Paydays post, Dana asked this most excellent question:
I would love to hear your perspective on when you share finances with someone and they are constantly focusing on the contrast. I recently saw a clip from Abe that addressed this by saying, you know what? I love you so much, I don’t care what you think.
That’s perfect advise and a great way to think about it, however, what if your money mate does more than think? What if they want to bring up their perceived lack, struggle and worry every couple of days and figuratively stomp their feet about it until you are not happy anymore?
What if they perceive your happiness as deluding yourself and being irresponsible? What if they literally throw a fit until you are knocked off kilter and forced to “worry” with them, even though you know it’s all fine and plenty more is coming?
What’s the perfect LOA way to prevent that kind of constant barrage from affecting your perception of payday? Are shared finances a recipe for LOA disaster? LOL!
You can tell she’s already ahead of the game with her ability to laugh as she asks the question, but what other words of wisdom would you share with someone who feels challenged in how to manage their partner’s habitual focus on problems?
I predict your responses to this post will be a valuable resource for many a creator!
Today’s question for the Good Vibe Community comes from a fellow creator who is wondering if we have to believe in something before it happens. Here’s the question in her words:
Can you manifest something that you don’t believe can happen? Everytime I try to imagine having a safe and secure relationship with a man who loves me, tears well up in my eyes and I become angry.
I do not believe any man could ever love me and treat me with care. I have been trying and trying, and I can NOT IMAGINE what it could be like. I can’t get to that joyful feeling of having it.
I manifest so many wonderful things, why can’t I imagine manifesting love from a man …on any level?
Actually, that’s two questions, isn’t it? And I suspect you’ll all have excellent input on both.
Shall we help our friend out?
This question comes from a reader wondering whether law of attraction can help get the guy.
Here’s her question:
If there is a specific man I want to date/have in my life, can I use LOA to have him?
I met this really great guy, and I think we’d be a good match. But how can I get my energies to flow to attract him to me?
The only connection I have to him is his sister (who adores him and thinks we’d be a good match, too).
This question comes up so often in my coaching practice that this topic alone could keep me in business. Let’s cover the ins and outs here as to whether it’s possible to attract a particular person into our love life.
Thanks in advance for your input, everyone!
Update: one of our fabulous commenters (M.) posted this video that many are finding helpful on this topic:
Just wanted to make sure everyone who was interested in this topic had a chance to see it.
This one is super juicy, too. (Thanks, Kellie!)