Dealing with Reality
When readers email questions, I do my best to respond with helpful answers – but this one inspired me to answer here. Partly because I think we all deal with it, and also because it’s an important one to get a handle on. Here’s the question:
“How do you attend to “reality” while focusing whole-heartedly on your desires?”
The reader goes on to ask: “How do you believe in the big wonderful Plan A dream while still having to live with what is currently manifested, sort of dealing with Plan B? Isn’t that squandering some of your energy if you have to make a Plan B, because that is all current resources allow?”
Her situation is one we’ve each faced in one form another … where we have the dream, as represented on the vision board, reminder bracelet, audio tapes -or whatever we’re using to activate the vibe of what we want. And then we all have the “reality” – the home we don’t love, the job that doesn’t cover the bills, the weight we’re still carrying, yada yada yada.
We know we get what we focus on, so as we attend to reality, we create more of the same. We know that concentrating on our dreams is how they come true. Yet focusing on dreams while living out “dreary” real life is easier said than done. Figuring out how to make it to next payday can be somewhat of an impediment to feeling like you’re rolling in dough, if you know what I mean. (Which I know many of you do, based on the emails you send.)
Two things important to remember here:
1) you don’t have to completely eliminate the old vibe in order to begin attracting what you want, and
2) you really can find a new, better-feeling perspective on your current reality.
Case in point: I successfully built my coaching practice amidst many and strong fears of failure. I didn’t have to totally rid myself of the fear vibe before perfect clients started showing up. I just needed to start spending some time with the “perfect clients hiring me” vibe. If I had to get the energy 100% perfect before anyone retained me, it wouldn’t have happened!
Second, no matter what’s happening (or not happening) in your life, there’s a better feeling way to see it than you’re looking at now. I’ve been practicing this deliberately the last couple days, and am amazed at the room for improvement I had in my perspective!
For example, when you’re scraping together rent payment for another month in the run down house in the city you don’t even want to be, there’s a way to see it differently. Maybe: “It’s nice to have a roof over my head,” “I’m going to miss these neighbors when I leave here,” “This place is close to work,” or even “This is one month closer to my last month here!”
Remember you don’t have to swim in your new vibe 24/7 in order to manifest it; and that there’s a way for you to inject (more) appreciation in your current reality.
As far as how to feel like you haven’t given up on Plan A while you’re living out Plan B, you can find your way to a thought that feels better.
- I’m on my way.
- This is my stepping stone.
- This is the platform I launch from.
- This is what allows me to get my vibe together.
- This probably isn’t as awful as I’ve been making out.
- There’s lots here to enjoy I don’t even see. But now that I look, I can see it.
- Even as I feel what I don’t enjoy, that’s just adding good stuff to my escrow, which I’m lining up with, every day.
- Things happen fast, and I might not see the big turnaround coming, but I know it is and when it gets here I’ll love it.
- In fact, I love just even thinking about it, and I know that “loving it” vibe serves me well.
- And I’ve got a great sweetie in on this gig with me, isn’t it nice we’re doing this together, on the same page about what we want, and doing lots of things to get there …
Bottom line is that if you think Plan B is squandering your energy, it is. If you think Plan B is helping you get where you want to be, it is. Find the thought that serves you better.
Also, another technique that I use in a pinch is remembering how my movie ends. I remind myself that I’m making all of this up, I’m the script-writer, and what I say goes. So I don’t have to worry or wonder how this thing plays out – I CHOOSE how it ends. And I choose Plan A.
Yes, I may be in one of those dark, scary scenes right now, but that’s just for dramatic effect. That’s just to keep my attention – and it makes the ending that much more delicious. So I ride out this scene knowing I’m on my way to what I choose. I know too much about LOA to not get this right. And once I get there, I’m just going to want something else anyway, so I may as well get used to the process and find a way to enjoy it.
In fact, what IS there to enjoy right now? Oh yeah, I’m wearing my favorite pants. My cat is sleeping in the sun. There’s chocolate in the cupboard. That’s my dad ringing me on the phone now … LOTS to enjoy now.
Releasing the worries, doubts, fears and picking up the appreciation and enjoyment puts you on a direct course to your Plan A, my friend. Find the thoughts that allow you to manage those vibes and repeat repeat repeat! Here’s to your happy ending. 🙂