Deliberate Creators Do It With Alignment
Today I had an exceptionally delicious lunch at my favorite Mexican restaurant.
I wondered about it, and the only reason I can figure it was so good was that I ate refried beans without judgment. Normally I order black beans, but today’s dish came with refried.
I used to think refried beans were worth skipping. I mean, “everyone knows” black beans are better for you, so that’s what I always went with.
But the refried beans were soooo good!
Which is easy to experience when I’m choosing what I want and enjoying it in the absence of thinking I shouldn’t be or it’s not good for me or whatever other thoughts spoil the party.
It made me think of a recent client looking for reassurance on a big decision about a breakup. Her head was spinning about whether she was taking the right road. The problem is when you’re flowing that much doubt, no action will serve you.
Whether you’re ordering lunch, engaging a coach, saying “I do,” signing a mortgage, taking a job or whatever action you’re taking, it’s best to do it without mixed vibrations.
Do it with alignment.
Now that’s a good bumper sticker: “Deliberate Creators do it with Alignment.” 🙂
That’s how we want to do it – whatever it is. All the way on board with it. Whichever path we travel doesn’t matter as much as the feeling behind it. We handicap our success when we entertain second thoughts or question whether we made the right choice.
No one wants to start something with one foot in and one foot out. Not you, not your boss, not your boyfriend. Doubts and second thoughts keep us from a really good time. Whether it’s a job, a marriage, a move, a medical treatment, an exercise plan, or even just a meal – if you’re gonna do it, get lined up with it.
How to do that?
I think the reason it happened at lunch today was because I’ve been practicing judgment free living with food.
I realized a couple months ago I had truly arrived at this judgment free place when I opened the cupboard for a snack and chose almonds over Oreos without any congrats to self for picking the “healthier” option. It used to be when I reached for almonds I would think “Oh look, I’m making the healthy choice!” but this day I reached for almonds and felt absolutely no pride or satisfaction whatsoever! Almonds were no different to me than Oreos. They were equal in my mind and in that moment I knew I had achieved a milestone in judgment free eating!
When you’re getting conscious about lining up with a big decision, here are a few tips for alignment:
1. Free to Choose
Start off by giving yourself complete permission to choose. It’s harder to get genuinely excited about something that you’re not really free to pick or to leave behind. You can embrace the freedom to choose by remembering that it isn’t even your action that matters – it’s your vibration. That should give you more wiggle room in feeling free to choose.
2. Identify Easier Path
As you consider options, feel out which one will be easiest to align to. When I was deciding whether to quit my corporate job or build a coaching practice on the side while keeping the paycheck, I knew quitting would activate financial fear. But I also knew finding the good vibe while spending the majority of every day doing something I hated was a bigger challenge. Quitting was an easier path to manage then staying.
3. Spotlight Why
Before you take the leap, remind yourself why you’re choosing this. Get a good spotlight on reasons why you believe this is the way to go. “My heart tells me this is right.” “This is the best investment I could make in myself.” “I believe these doctors know what they’re doing.” “They probably don’t even use lard in refried beans any more anyway.”
4. Attention Forward
My grade school teacher used to say “eyes forward.” Meaning, don’t pay attention to anyone else – eyes up front. That works here, too, in terms of get your attention on what you want, on what you’re creating. We don’t let our mind linger on negative what ifs or heavy doubts or allow it to second guess or make up ugly stories. We commit. We CHOOSE it to be the right thing. And if we need to remind ourselves on occasion why we chose it, then we do so.
If your better feeling thought is to remember that it all works out, and it’s not such a big deal anyway, and there’s no such thing as failure, and everyone has to have a starter marriage, after all, … whatever thoughts feel better, use them to strengthen your alignment.
Remember: your action doesn’t matter nearly as much as your vibration does.
I’m all for taking the actions that make it easier for us to flow a good vibration and to expect good results. I set myself up for easier beliefs about success by taking strong actions regularly. Once you choose an action, though, as my favorite new reality host would say, “Make it work.” (I just discovered Project Runway this fall! Love you, Tim!)
I’d love to hear from you guys your tips for getting lined up. Please share your thoughts and suggestions in the comments.
PS – even if you’ve already made your decision it’s not too late to line up with it retroactively.