Is Your Brain Giving Good Advice?
The LOA Science Guy, Greg Kuhn, explains how he deals with his brain’s bad advice when it comes to managing emotional pain.
When in emotional pain, I am no different, perhaps, than anyone else. My brain usually screams, “Who did this to us?”
Does that reaction sound familiar to you?
Then my brain lays out a plan for me – old and familiar. A compelling blueprint that I used my entire life until I created the game, “Grow a Greater You”:
- Pinpoint who or what is responsible for this pain
- Detail the injustice perpetrated upon me
- Get angry at the responsible party
- Decide what the responsible party must do to rectify the injustice
- Hold the responsible party accountable for resolving my pain
My brain’s old, familiar plan also includes two typical techniques for communicating with the party “responsible” for my emotional pain:
1. Withdraw and give the silent treatment. Make the responsible party figure out what’s wrong. My mantra for this technique is: “If she really cared about me, she would know what she did to me.”
2. Go on the offensive and angrily confront the responsible party. Demand she face the music and make amends to me. My mantra for this technique is: “How dare you do something that hurts me?”
My brain can’t help itself. It is completely fooled by the Newtonian illusion my eyes and ears provide it. It thinks that life happens “to” me and, thus, things outside myself are responsible for my displeasing material experiences.
Those explanations are logical, after all. They make perfect sense, especially when it comes to emotional pain.
Yet our new quantum paradigms teach us that there is no “out there”; we are involved observers who create our material experiences. Because material experiences are merely our beliefs being reflected back to us.
We, alone, create the meaning and value of every material experience we have. There is no such thing as “the way it is”.
Eleanor Roosevelt may not have thought of herself as a guru of new quantum paradigms when she said, “No one can make you feel inferior without your consent.” But she was – we are just as responsible for our emotional pain as anyone else.
So I have come to expect my brain to give me bad advice when I’m in emotional pain. My brain has no idea its advice is bad in the first place.
Thus I am gentle with my brain as I remind it that we now apply our life to quantum paradigms. Which means that when we are in pain, we ignore the illusion that something outside of us is responsible. I don’t pretend there is no pain, yet I also pay attention to the helpful feedback pain is giving me so I can more intentionally align my beliefs with my desired outcomes.
This doesn’t mean I don’t sometimes distance myself from a thoughtless person. Nor does it mean that I don’t sometimes let someone know that her behavior is out of line or unwelcome.
I simply make sure I don’t pin the resolution of any pain or displeasure I’m experiencing upon that person or entity altering the offending act.
Instead I pay attention to my feelings.
I am honest with myself about the displeasure, while reminding myself that the undesirable feelings are useful feedback regarding my beliefs being out of alignment with my desired outcomes. This doesn’t “excuse” anyone for rude or hurtful behavior, but it does put me in touch with the only reliable (and real) solution to emotional pain.
It also allows me to apply my life to new, quantum paradigms. Paradigms much more accurately reflective of how our universe really works. And, today, I can intentionally grow my beliefs about any desire into an alignment which produces pleasing material experiences.
Greg Kuhn is the best selling author of the Why Quantum Physicists book series. Known as the “Law of Attraction Science Guy,” Greg’s newest book shares how our universe works and how you can live the most fulfilling life possible.
You can find Greg online here.