Feeling Better When They Don't
We’ve all done it – made someone upset by something we said or did.
Or didn’t say or do.
Like when we didn’t say yes to the favor a friend wanted. (“No, I’m not watching your cat who attacks on sight. Get a sitter!”)
Or when we answered our sister truthfully when she asked about her husband’s behavior. (“Really, sis, it didn’t seem like a big deal to me.”)
Or when we refused to go along with the boss’s answer when the client asked for a realistic delivery timeframe.
Yikesy, some people can get mad at us!
But that’s the thing … we didn’t really upset them. They upset themselves and are just blaming it on us.
That’s rather normal, unfortunately.
It’s not accurate. And it’s not helpful.
But it is rather normal.
(I probably did it three times today myself already!)
Conscious creators in their right mind, though, know that we alone are responsible for how we feel.
Even though that can be tricky to practice. (In fact, I consider it a master manifesting skill to not give a rip what others think.)
It’s worth remembering when we’re feeling bad because of how someone else feels about us.
They might think you let them down. Or betrayed them.
They might think you’re a colossal idiot. Or the devil incarnate.
They might think you owe them. And that you’ve ruined their life.
They might accuse you of having no heart and being incapable of feeling love or compassion or empathy.
Here’s the thing …
… that’s okay.
They get to think whatever they think and feel whatever they feel.
That’s for them. Not you.
But if your well-being depends on their favorable opinion, you’ve got a big vibrational handicap in place.
Because it’s virtually impossible to ensure everyone loves you all the time.
(You likely know this if you’ve tried to manage their opinions of you before!)
What’s a conscious creator to do at a time like this?
Let them have it.
I mean – let them have it their way. What they think and feel is not your concern. And it’s not your fault.
It’s not for you to manage.
And it’s really cool if you can learn to not give a rip what they think!
It’s way more important – and powerful – when you focus on how YOU feel.
With that in mind, here’s a little script for feeling better when someone else thinks you’re the reason they feel bad.
Edit and repeat as required to get back to your own feel good when the rest of the world isn’t.
Okay, so he’s/she’s mad at me.
I got that.
And I can be cool with that.
It’s not my fault that he feels what he feels. That’s his business.
We’re all grownups here. He’s in charge of him; I’m in charge of me.
And I know how to be in good charge of myself.
I know how to feel better even when someone else doesn’t.
Even when they think it’s my fault. Even when they paint me as the bad guy.
I know how to let them have that, and still choose something else for myself.
Because I feel good about who I am and how I conduct myself.
I approve of the decisions I’ve made.
(And if I don’t, this is my chance to get better at it.)
I’m just doing the best I can with what I’ve got where I stand right now.
Can’t expect any more than that.
I know better than to try bending over backwards to make someone else happy. That’s a losing proposition. For all of us.
All I can be is me.
If they’re not down with that, they deserve someone else to get tangled up with anyway.
Because I deserve to feel better.
I deserve to know that I’m a good person who is being true to herself as best she can.
And all in all, I’m doing a good freakin’ job of that! Look at me go – not caring what others think! This is pretty cool to free myself of needing others to think well of me!
In fact, if there were awards for this, I’d probably get one!
And isn’t that what matters most? That I be true to myself? I’ve done the other routine long enough to know it doesn’t work.
What does work is for me to tend to my own feelings. And I know how to do that.
I know how to think a thought that feels better. (I’m doing it right now!)
I know how to take the action that feels best. I know how to focus my attention in a way that serves my vibration.
I know that I’m in charge of how I feel. And I know it’s okay to have a bad day now and again – they keep the system running! Bad days are great! They’re a must-have!
But if today isn’t that day for me, I know how to let go and relax. I know how to love myself no matter what.
I know how to feel better right here and now.
There are a lot of great qualities about me that not everyone sees, and that’s fine. I see it, and that’s what counts.
In fact, the better I see those great things about myself, the more I attract others who feel the same. And that’s a cool party!
After all, I’m a pretty amazing person! And anyone who doesn’t get that – they are not for me. Not right now, anyway. If they come to their senses about how fabulous I am, cool. If not, that’s cool, too.
Because I know. And that’s enough. When I love who I am, I don’t need anyone else’s approval. That is freedom!
So here’s to letting them sort it out themselves.
I’m not joining their drama. Because I choose to feel good. I choose to love myself.
I got this.
I choose to enjoy this delightful day in this exceptional life I’ve been given.
And so it is.