Granting Freedom from Tolerations
Even savvy creators sometimes don’t see the vibrational obstacles that keep us from manifesting what we want …
… things like jobs we detest, relationships that are dysfunctional, or responsibilities that weigh on us.
The reason we don’t recognize these situations, people or things as problematic to our manifesting is because we’ve gotten so used to them we don’t even realize what an energetic drain they are.
(Like the frog who doesn’t jump out of the pot as the heat gradually increases … we’re just used to it.)
This post is intended to offer potential solutions.
Not because I know what’s best for you when it comes to changing your work, or breaking up with partners, or considering bankruptcy.
But because I believe there is one thing that can help no matter the situation we’re dealing with.
That is to recognize we have a choice.
We always have a choice.
Here’s a personal example …
Once upon a time I hated my job, but I went because of the story I believed about how I should be grateful for it, that bills needed paying, and that the investment in this career shouldn’t be wasted, etc. etc.
And it was misery.
But once I realized (with the help of a coach) that I actually had a choice as to whether I got out of bed and went to work, it wasn’t quite as awful to go. I could stay home. That was an option!
That choice would have consequences, surely … but it was an option!
Believe it or not, that was a new perspective to me. I could stay home! I could get a different job. I could spend my savings. I could go bankrupt. I could move back home with folks. (Okay, maybe not that.) But I had options!
All of a sudden the routine of going to work felt different. Because now it was a conscious choice.
And when I didn’t enjoy my marriage …
I’d been raised to believe divorce was not an option; that this was a promise for life. Grin and bear it. It’s what we do.
Then one day (with the help of my husband who was starting to opt out), I realized I could stay married – or I could be divorced.
Realizing that I had the freedom to choose differently, to choose again, was like hearing the song of angels! I could go! Things could be different!
Just having the breathing room of knowing there were alternate possibilities available made it easier to be there. (We eventually divorced at his initiation, but it was the right thing to do.)
And there was a client who did not enjoy being a parent. At all. That was her big toleration in life. (And that’s not an easy thing to admit, my friends: that you’d rather not have kids.)
This mom was flabbergasted to hear me suggest she seriously consider her long time fantasy of relinquishing custody to her ex-husband (who was a great father, she admitted) to pursue her dream of travel.
As she considered the possibility, guess what happened? She began to recognize the joys of raising her children. To the point she realized she would not be happy giving it up. That’s the magic of feeling choice in life.
When you give yourself permission to choose differently, you grant yourself freedom.
So when you’re doing the work of following what feels best, be sure to include some options you might not have considered before. Give yourself freedom to make a true choice, and don’t be surprised if that in itself transforms your experience of old “tolerations.”
(Easy to say for the girl who quit and got divorced, I know, but take it from my client who is now happily raising her children – it helps tremendously to recognize we truly have a choice.)
If any of you have experiences to share about eliminating big tolerations in life, I’d love to hear them!