July 7, 2008

How Simple Can Law of Attraction Be?

This piece from Michael Neill’s newsletter is such a simple method of enacting the Law of Attraction that I wanted to post it for those of you who don’t already receive his notes.  (You can sign up for them at www.geniuscatalyst.com.)  Here it is:

I was speaking with a friend yesterday who told me about a simple conversation which changed her life.
She was in the midst of complaining to one of her teachers about her life when she said “I guess what I really want is to be happy.”
He smiled at her and asked, “Do you ever get a happy feeling?”
“Occasionally,” she replied.
“Do more of that,” he said.
Nonplussed by the simplicity of the reply, she went on to discuss her failing marriage.
“Was there a time when your marriage was happy?” her teacher asked.
“Well of course, in the beginning.”
“What was different?”
She thought about it for a few moments.
“I guess when we were first together I wasn’t so critical of him all the time. Nowadays I’m obsessed with every stupid thing he’s ever done, and when we’re together it feels like I’m just waiting to see how he’ll mess things up this time.
In the early days, I couldn’t stop thinking about what a great guy he was and running through all the fun times we had together in my mind. All I wanted to do was just enjoy hanging out with him.”
Her teacher smiled again, said “Do more of that”, and walked away.
She said that her first response to the conversation was shock and a bit of anger at her difficult, difficult problems being dismissed like that. “After all,” she thought to herself, “that’s the kind of simplistic advice I would expect from my grandmother!” But then something shifted.
She could see her future out in front of her like a line, and she saw how her constant obsession with her husband’s faults would lead to an unpleasant separation and divorce. Then she imagined making his good qualities more important than his bad ones and simply enjoying his company and could see a long and increasingly happy life together stretching on out into the future.
When she imagined herself continuing to obsess about her unhappiness, her image of the future became cloudy and grey; as soon as she imagined herself “doing more happy feelings”, it brightened up and just thinking about it made her smile.
Since I knew her to be someone who was generally very happy and whose marriage, while no doubt not perfect, seemed perfectly wonderful, I asked her how she had made the change.
“It was actually quite easy”, she replied. “Once I really saw the impact of my obsessing with what’s wrong and compared it to the possibility of focusing on what’s right, I just naturally started to do less of what wasn’t working and more of what was.”
“But what about when you were caught up in a negative spin?” I asked.
“I either waited it out, knowing it was just a low mood and would pass,” she said, “or sometimes, I just changed my mind.”
Now it was my turn to be nonplussed.
“You just changed your mind?”
“Sure. Haven’t you ever had a negative reaction to something but then, as you learned more about it, you decided that it was actually a good thing?”
“Of course. When Nina first told me she was pregnant, I thought it was a disaster and that I was going to have to give up my work and become a plumber. As soon as my son was born, I realized how gloriously wrong I had been and now having kids is one of the most wonderful things in my life.”
My friend smiled at me mischievously.
“Do more of that.”
(c) 2008 Michael Neill/All Rights Reserved
Genius Catalyst Inc.
4220 Esteban Road
Woodland Hills, CA

Jeannette again: I’d love to hear what stops those of you from practicing this simple habit of doing more of what makes you happy (i.e. feels good).  It’s a key component of my coaching with clients, so this is an important topic for me not just as a deliberate creator, but also a coach!

  • I agree, tbea, and I also think the more we focus on the good things the more of a habit that becomes. So eventually our autopilot IS to feel positive and good.
    Thanks for reading, my friend, and for posting! 🙂

  • tbea says:

    It IS so simple to feel good if that is what we truly want, sometimes it is just easier to go on autopilot and let the ego take over with negativity. I know that the more I catch myself and turn it around to focus on the good things and to be grateful for all of it (the good and the bad) the better I feel – everytime! Thanks for another awesome post!

  • Tia says:

    I love love love little princess, its one of my 4 absolute favorite children’s books (the other’s being the little prince, heidi and little women .. lots of littles here lol)

  • Missy B, I love it when Universe winks at us! Nice reminder – thanks for that!
    And Gillian, I’m off to put Little Princess on my Netflix list. Sounds like I’m going to love it!

  • Gillian says:

    Ya, talking about coincidences again, just as I read Jeannette’s answer to my posting, I asked myself what felt good. So turning on the TV was what felt good and I tuned in to HBO and was half way into a film called “Little Princess” with Liesel Matthews. Oh Goodness, that movie is showing us the magic of the Law of Attraction! That movie explains LOA in detail. How to use our power of imagination and not get caught up in our grim reality, believe in your dreams and achieve our dreams magically. Practically everything that Jeannette has been teaching us about the LOA, is revealed in that beautiful children’s movie.
    Liesel plays Sara, who has to work as a servant in a girl’s boarding school. When faced with punishment and not given any food, she uses the power of her imagination and “alligns” herself with what she wants, which is food, and starts smelling the saussages, eventhough it isn’t there yet. The next morning she wakes up infront of an entire banquette of food and the saussages, she was smelling in advance. It sure has a fairytale story to it, but its still Law of Attraction demonstrated in detail. Any LOA practitioner, who has not watched the “Little Princess” should see it. I wonder why they don’t make movies like that for adults.

  • Missy B says:

    I believe coincidences is one of the ways that the Universe winks on us to say we are right where we are meant to be. I always get this huge sense of relief … yep, I’m meant to be here, doing this thing, right now, even though I’ve no idea how it links in to my wants. At times I’ve been so sure that coindidences have “shown” me the way … but it turned out it wasn’t the way I thought and the end result wasn’t attained as one had wished for. So I try not read “oh this coincidence has happened so this outcome WILL happen”. I just accept that no matter what the outcome, the universe is winking at me and saying “you’re right on track babe”.

  • Loved your synchronicity clip, Kim! And I can’t think of a more beautiful yet simple way to say than you did here: “coincidence in life, dreams and imagination is the universe reflecting back to us who we are.”


  • Kim Falconer says:

    Hi Jeannette, Everyone!
    I love this post–simplicity it is. I find my life becoming more and more simple, peaceful and happy. Just when I think things are as good as they can get, they get even better!
    As for coincidence and synchronicity, I have a section of my website devoted to it, if anyone’s interested. I made a little flash animation to introduce the ideas. Just go to my website and click SYNCHRONICITY third from the top if you want to take a look.
    To put it simply, coincidence in life, dreams and imagination is the universe reflecting back to us who we are. 🙂
    Jung put it this way: “(Synchronicity is) the coincidence in time of two or more causally unrelated events which have the same meaning.”
    We attract them, recognize them because, as Jeannette says, they are in alignment with our vibration. We may not always understand the meaning, but if we recognize they are a piece of ourselves, it starts to become clear.
    Thank you Jeannette for the insights!

  • Peregrine John says:

    Aw, shoot. I don’t know about any “wisdom,” but it’s definitely offered in love, and a desire to see you – and all of us – awash in love and joy. It’s just taking your suggestion, wondering why we don’t all adopt it as a habit, and going from there. To be honest, it’s now one of those things I advise myself regularly to do, but accomplish not so often. You’d think that one taste would keep me in it forever. Stupid ego.
    Some day I’ll understand these little flashes of insight more. Right now I just know that opening oneself to love, and loving like we claim (openly or unconsciously) to do, both gives clearer messages to the Universe and taps into the Source of joy. I’m flattered, humbled, blown away by your reaction, to think the observation is valuable to those farther down the path than I. True, there’s no threat to your independence here – to the contrary, I love to see you fly.

  • John, why is it your “I’m telling you right now” words I didn’t even CATCH until the third time I’d read your post?!
    Maybe because my ego isn’t set up in defensive posture to you? Or because I don’t believe you threaten my independence? Maybe because you offer those words with pure love and wisdom?
    At any rate, I’m incredibly grateful for this post of yours. Not just for myself, but for everyone who reads it. You couldn’t be more right about anything more important. (imho)

  • Peregrine John says:

    Nicole reminds me that this post reminded me of an earlier one (in the blog’s previous incarnation, I think) wherein Jeannette wondered: What if we treated our “loved ones” as well as we treat our pets? And why the heck don’t we?
    Mostly, I think, it’s because of that ego-driven and illusory clinging to control that I mentioned above. It’s just uncomfortable, the thought of admitting such a complex wrong, even if the wronged loves you and the rewards for righting it are instant and wonderful. I’m telling you right now that doing such a thing, removing that dread hypocrisy and throwing oneself into the love that’s waiting, is a sure path to amazing joy and an unkinked pipeline to the power of manifestation.

  • Gillian, those are perfect examples of LOA masquerating as coincidences! We get what we vibrate .. and as you vibrate dream houses, dream houses appear. As you vibrate answers to questions, answers appear! ha!

    Fun stuff, huh?!

    You are proving yourself quite a natural at this deliberate creation work!

    Thank you so much for including us in your world, Gillian!

  • Gillian says:

    Jeannette, I had flipped through some of your previous articles and I actually found the answer to my question. Your article “Does your manifsting formula add up” answered what I had been wondering about striking the right balance between good thought and inspired action in order to manifest our deires. I learned by now, how to focus on what I want and thinking good thoughts, however I am still confused when it comes to taking action. Not that I don’t want to take action, I am just not sure what sort of actions to take. You see, call it coincidence or not, as I focus on a question or desire, I got the answer some how in one of your articles. Thanks, Jeannette!

  • Gillian says:

    Yap, I would love to hear what others have to say about coincidences and serendipities. I find strange coincidences happen to me when I express a strong desire for something and after focusing on it. For example: I had visualized for some time my dream house, how it would look like and feel like, going into details how I would decorate it. After focusing on my dream house for some time, I got an offer to do the Interior Design ( I am an Interior Designer) for a house, which was just being built with the exact number of rooms as I had envisioned for my own house, just as big as my own house, and the owner was expressing almost the same Design ideas I had in mind for my own house. Coincidence? Not sure. Some say, when we experience serendipities, its the universe telling us, that we are in the flow and that our desires are heard and already making their way to us. Would be curious what others think of coincidences and what role they play in our deliberate creating process

  • OlderWiser, you make one of my favorite points in that a thought that works for one person doesn’t necessarily work for another.

    It sounds like you’ve done a lot of exploration about what thoughts work for you – and that’s what deliberate creation is all about! I hope you give yourself good credit for that. 🙂

  • OlderWiser says:

    Just a note for you, Jeanette. 🙂 The “for my highest good” thing often doesn’t sit well with people from abusive or dysfunctional families. Our parents told us that their abuse was for our highest good, and while we knew (even at the time) that it wasn’t true, there’s a real tendency to run like crazy from anything that is said to be “for your own good”.
    It took me ages and ages to deal with this whole “for my highest good” thing. I’m still not entirely okay with the idea. It implies that someone or something else outside of myself is sitting around deciding what I should and shouldn’t have, be, or do, and holding it back from me, because it’s “for my highest good”.
    And the fact is, I’ve actually come to the conclusion that I can manifest BAD stuff for myself, too! I’ve done a lot of inventory of my life and my attitudes and so forth, and I’m absolutely convinced that I can and have manifested not-very-good things for myself. Just a couple weeks ago, I manifested an injured back for myself, just by putting too much focus and attention on it, and that’s a very minor manifestation. I’ve manifested abusive spouses and poverty and all kinds of bad things.
    That I did learn from them is a good thing, but I certainly can and have manifested some very dark and undesirable things for myself. I don’t believe that all of them were for “highest good”. I learned from most of them, yes, but that says more about my ability to learn from experience, than for the “goodness” of the events.

  • Oooh, Nicole – HOW FUN!! “Unconditional love”!
    I was just talking about this very topic with a client tonight.
    It’s easy for me to agree with you that it can be challenging to practice, but I love that you’re not only UP for that challenge, but you’re CONQUERING it!
    (Is it appropriate to say one can “conquer” unconditional love? ha)
    And with that – you’ve inspired me to go practice some unconditional love tonight.
    (Anyone who read my first Good News post tonight will understand what challenge I’m referencing. hee hee)
    Thanks, Nicole, for chiming in! You’re an absolute pleasure to hear from!

  • Mike says:

    Thank you for this post.
    Peace and blessings,

  • Nicole says:

    Excellent post. It is funny how after you are in a relationship with someone for so long that you begin to nitpick everything they do. I have fallen in this trap in the past and didn’t really even realize I was doing it. The anger associated with this is very harmful to one’s energy.
    I think after being with someone for awhile you feel they are an extension of who you are and if that doesn’t hold up to a certain standard it makes you feel bad, which in turn places blame on that person for all your negative feelings. The ironic thing about this is that I have studied Buddhism and Taoism and feel compassion and love for all. Yet, non-judgment and compassion fell past my dear spouse. In reality, non-judgment and compassion did not hold true for the feelings I had for myself. My spouse was only receiving the emotions that I felt for myself.
    A changing point came after reading the Divine Matrix by Gregg Braden (we all love him!) By removing judgment from all of my spouses actions, I was free to love him completely.
    It is a challenge to love those around you unconditionally.
    I have a funny story that also occurred around the same time. A childhood friend and I got together a few months ago and were laughing about old times and talking about another friend of ours who constantly brings up ‘old’ news from when we were in high school…(we are in our early 30s!!) Our friend still has bad feelings from what certain people did to her in those times and talks about them regularly. I said something about how i hope she releases the hatred from herself and my childhood friend said, “I KNOW! The only person I ever hate is my husband!”
    Needless to say we got a good laugh about it, but it goes to show how the anger and resentment can really be directed towards those you hold most dear.
    Jeannette, I have lurked on your blog for awhile, and am so happy to have a site to go to for uplifting articles throughout the day. I work for an IT department and am constantly on my pc. . . it’s nice to have a break from the techie world! The pray rain journal has been awesome…u rock!

  • You know where I would start, Judi? I would start by looking at the things where I DID get what I wanted, where life DID go my way, where I was fulfilled and satisfied and delighted.

    Even if there are only three times I can think of – those are three access points to latch on to a new belief!

    As I do that, I’m creating new (or strengthening rarely used) neural pathways … and as I keep that up that eventually becomes the “rut” thought my brain defaults to.

    I would also remind myself that no matter how powerful my old story seems, I change my future by letting go of that old one. And I would point out to myself where that’s been true in my experience. Like …

    I used to believe I couldn’t be a public speaker, and then, even if I could BE one, I couldn’t enjoy it, and that I was no good in relationships, yada yada yada. I changed all THOSE stories. I can certainly change this one, too.

    And I would remind myself that as I say a habit is hard to change, so it is. If I said old habits were easy for me to change, and I was readily engaging the process, and calling in lots of higher guidance for the work, and that it would be swift and effective … well, that’s a nice new signal to send to Universe.

    Even more so, I would remember everything that happens is in my highest good, so even when it seems I didn’t get what I wanted … pff … that turned out to be a blessing!! (Like when my husband wanted a divorce, like when my boss tried to fire me, like when .. well, I’m not sure how not getting asked to prom served me, but I’m sure it did! Because everything does.)

    Looking back on those circumstances where I can clearly see that’s the case helps me know that I ALWAYS get what’s best for me. How could I be disappointed in that?

    These are all Jedi mind tricks – ha ha – not really – these are all different thoughts that may or may not help you feel better. Find one (or create one) that works for you, and put it to work. 🙂

    I’ve got a feeling someone here will share some additional ideas as well … ?

    Great question, Judi. Thanks for offering it!

  • Judi says:

    OlderWiser, thanks for telling us about those habits and family programming that you are still experiencing. It really struck a chord with me.
    Especially the bit about not getting your hopes up about anything. I learnt this too. I can remember at an early age getting to a stage where I would always convince myself that I wouldn’t get what I wanted just so that I wouldn’t be disappointed when and if it didn’t happen. And like you I still go into this as a default mode, as you say it feels “safe”.
    I could have written your sentence that starts “I fear that if I come back out of the discouragement……”
    This kind of programming seems so hard to shift, and what sort of subconscious vibes must we be sending out?
    “This is what I want, what I really, really want, but I mustn’t get too excited in case it doesn’t come and then I’ll just be more disappointed than I was to start with”
    Wow, how do we start to undo that one?
    Help, please Jeannette!!!

  • Thanks, Paul, for gently reminding us of the simplicity of this work!

    I know I as a coach tend to make this a big complex thing, which is probably why I enjoyed Michael’s article so much.

    It’s so EASY! Let’s let it be!

    Hey, have our comments always been right justified? I don’t remember them being formatted like this … ?

  • Paul. says:

    Thanks, Judi, for another song to add to my mental “good vibe” playlist. (Note to self: remember to “pivot” more.)
    I’m always impressed by how simple this Law of Attraction stuff and how difficult we (myself included) make it. I take a little bit of comfort in the fact that I can make it easier for myself.
    I know, Kim & OlderWiser, what you mean about habits and family programming; sometmes I wonder if I’ll get that weeded out. Have you seen Esther Hicks’ & Abraham’s video on YouTube where Abraham is talking about family programming (putting your hand on the stove)? Not only does it make their point but it’s funny, too.
    Thank you, Jeannette, for reminding me that this really is just that simple. (Now off to “do more of” something other than what I have been doing lately.)

  • You know, OlderWiser, I think your experience is not uncommon, and I also believe that our inner/higher self – whatever you want to name it – calls us toward the happy “more of that.”

    No matter how long we’ve done it or good we’ve gotten at it, I think it always calls us. Once we start listening, and answering, it gets stronger, too.

    At least that thought sure makes me smile. 🙂

    Thanks for posting, my friend! Your perspective is much appreciated.

  • OlderWiser says:

    I learned in my very dysfunctional family that it was usually better not to get your hopes up (for ANYthing) and to just quietly sit in the darkness of your despair, not calling attention to yourself. It was a survival technique. It kept me from having my spirit and my will totally crushed.
    So, I’ve got years and years of bad habit to overcome, basically. I work on it all the time and made a lot of progress in my thinking, my perspective, my attitude, etc., but sometimes I still fall back into those patterns of thought and once I’m there, it feels weirdly “safe”. I fear that if I come back out of the discouragement and negativity, I’ll start to hope again, and then my hopes will be dashed and I’ll feel even worse…
    So there’s an element of fear, there as well, as with most kinds of negative behaviour. Hmm.

  • Yep, that’s the good news, Kim. We’re changing habits here. Thanks for posting your comments – I like this.

    In fact, I bet if you looked you could see how some of your LOA work has also become habit.

    Even if it’s just checking in here. (Which I love that you do, by the way!)

    Much love & appreciation …

  • Kim says:

    Also simple but I think the reason I personally don’t “do more of that” is habit. Over 40+ yrs of the habit of focusing on the bad stuff. Although I’ve been working with deliberate creation for some time now I still find myself falling into the same old habit (just like unconsciously cracking my knuckles) until something happens (like one of your posts) to help awaken me.

  • Ha! I love that you brought Spice Girls in to support our deliberate creation habits, Judi! lol

    Thanks for that!!

    I’ll be singing it all night – and hopefully tomorrow, too! lol

  • Judi says:

    Hi Jeannette, great post as usual. It reminded me of something that has started happening when I remember to do “pivoting” the Abraham technique where you catch yourself focusing on what you don’t want or having a negative emotion and you “pivot “the thought to what you do want or how you want to feel.
    As I am doing it the words from a Spice Girls song come into my head – not a huge Spice Girls fan by the way, but this song just sticks!! It goes “I’ll tell you what I want, what I really, really want” – yes you all know that song!!
    So thanks to your post Jeannette, last night when I started “wanting” all these “things” I sang in my head “I’ll tell you what I want, what I REALLY, REALLY want” and got straight to the essence instead – simple! Love it.
    The essence of what I really, really want is simple too – I want to feel loved, fulfilled, happy, safe and secure, and free of all money worries, and to live in a quiet, peaceful rural home. That’s the essence of ALL that I want. I just need to let go of micromanaging how it comes – thanks again Jeannette.
    I’m now imagining us all singing this silly little song all day as we pivot and get clear on our “essence”!!! Whooo!

  • I think serendipities and coincidences could be explained vibrationally … although I do still find myself using the phrase “out of the blue” which doesn’t jive with that thought.

    Curious to hear others’ opinions, though …

  • Gillian says:

    It seems so simple, yet not quite so simple when applying LOA. Deliberate creation is a skill that needs to be mastered, step by step. How about serendipities or coincidences? What role do they play in deliberate creation?

  • Nat Couropmitree says:

    Jeannette, I too find myself getting caught up on the “thing.” Ironically, these times are my best reminders to choose how I want to feel. In the end though, it doesn’t really matter what we choose. We as spiritual beings are just here to experience ourselves – to experience our creations – and remember who we are. Of course, since we do get to choose, why not choose to be happy, right?

  • Excellent point, Nat. We are spiritual beings here to experience ourselves, and we always have the choice of what we’ll feel. I like that.

    And as my dad reminded me at lunch the other day: “it’s ALL spiritual.”

  • Nat, I could not agree more! And yet, for as much as I KNOW this, there are some times when I still find myself getting caught up on the “thing” … but with reminders like this, those times become fewer and further between.
    Michael’s always good for a profound reminder.
    Thanks for posting your thoughts, Nat! Hope to hear more of your perspective on future posts. 🙂

  • Nat Couropmitree says:

    Hi Jeannette. I thank you for sharing this great post because people need to know that the Law of Attraction can be this simple. I think people are so accustomed to basing their happiness on getting stuff or having things go their way. And so they try to use the LOA for this purpose to be happier, to feel loved, appreciated, etc. But what most people don’t know is that the reason they want ‘stuff’ is because of the way they think it’s going to make them feel. So if people were able to connect in with how they want to feel (i.e. happy) and then choose it, they then become a vibrational match to what they want and attract it more easily. In the mean time, they are already feeling good so it doesn’t really matter when the thing they want is created.

  • You’re funny, John! I wouldn’t mind knowing your Grandma.

  • Peregrine John says:

    Grandmas rule. For the most part, they don’t give a pair of fetid figs about your gigantic, sacred, fragile ego, and so they just ignore it and give direct advice that seems so simplistic – but works, if we also break through that idiotic ego, loosen the stranglehold on life’s reins, and just do what they said. They know that only a great fool thinks that he or she can actually be in control of everything, and that knowing when to toss it to a more powerful force is really the key to living happily.
    Grandmas rule.

  • Related Post