Integrity and the Law of Attraction

bike.jpgWhat does personal integrity have to do with the law of attraction?
Much of my personal development training has dealt with the topic of integrity: how if one spoke in your wheel of life is missing, the whole thing doesn’t work.
Some people approach deliberate creation without much thought to the level of truth they live their life with.
They think wanting to manifest the partner of their dreams has nothing to do with how they feel about their job. Or that attracting financial prosperity will solve the problems in their marriage. Or that their drinking problem has no effect on their ability to make their dream come true.
How to put this succinctly …
It’s all related, folks.
How we feel affects what we can create. Period.
So if you’re out of integrity in one area of life, it’ll touch the other areas in some form or fashion. You can count on it.
Which is why one of the most powerful ways you can start getting what you want is to clean up the areas you’re out of alignment in and begin living authentically.
It’s why when one of my ex-boyfriends finally broke up with me, he immediately experienced incredible professional success. It’s why when my girlfriend paid off debt that she wasn’t comfortable with, her romantic and professional life took a big turn for the better. It’s why when I don’t tell Russ what’s bothering me in the relationship, it feels like my manifesting is in slow motion.
Personal integrity. Living what’s true for you. Knowing who you are and living what’s important.
It’s easier said than done for many.
Without the awareness of where you’re not being authentic, living in integrity is a good trick. But once you know where you’ve been pretending, you’ve got material to work with.
Here’s a common and quick exercise for excavating your truth:
When you’ve got a couple of private minutes to yourself, get quiet and grounded, and complete each of the following statements:

“I’ve been pretending that … “

“The truth is that … “
Repeat the series until you hit on something that feels … well, it might feel like a pang in the heart or like you just got hit between the eyes. This realization doesn’t have to be painful, though – it can be liberating. Especially when you act on it.
And acting on it is critical to swift and successful manifesting.
Otherwise we handicap our vibration with negative energy that often leaves us frustrated as to why law of attraction seems to work for everyone but us.
So if you want to create immediate motion in your deliberate creation efforts, discover where you’ve got a short spoke in your wheel and address it. Difficult as it may temporarily be to do this work, the payoff of an authentic life makes it worthwhile.
(I know these are personal stories to share, but if you have an example of this to share with others by posting a comment, I guarantee you’ll inspire someone else to take brave steps in their own life, too.)
Namaste, friends.

  • September 30, 2007
  • Good Vibe Coach says:

    Thanks for posting, Pedro! It’s always a pleasure to hear from you. I have to say, I particularly like your signoff in your personal emails. Very inspiring. 🙂

  • Pedro Avalos says:

    Hi Jeanette,

    I like a lot the natural way you explain in detail how we create events.

    I hope to have the opportunity to be mentored by you.



  • Vanessa says:

    Hi J’
    Glad it’s not only me that is having “integrity” problems. But I’ve realised it feels much worse when you sacrifice your integrity for the sake of someone else. Irrespective of how much you love the person you are doing it for, it still doesn’t feel right, as with you and your boyfriend’s son and me and my monster (sorry, I really meant to say mother)-in-law!

    p.s J’ I’ve written a little about you and your blog, on my latest blog entry. You may wish to take a look (it’s all very complimentary I promise!)

  • Good Vibe Coach says:

    Yes, “holistic integrity.” Well said, John.

    And I love the “giant bronze bell”!

    I had a similar experience with Ruiz’s book, which I haven’t admitted out loud before. Glad I’m not the only one. : )

    Please post your blog link when you’ve written about this topic!!

    Thanks for insightful words, John. Always nice to hear from you!!

  • Good Vibe Coach says:

    Vanessa, that was SO me (in a sense) just last month! My boyfriend’s 19 year old son refuses to acknowledge me in any way, shape or form, which I’ve been pretending I can handle.

    (The truth is it DOES bother me, it’s hurtful, and someone should have stuck up for me by now! Hey, do you think that someone was ME?!)

    On my boyfriend’s birthday dinner last month (where his son and I had to sit at the table with each other for 30 minutes because Russ was late due to golfing!) I reached the breaking point.

    In the parking lot afterward I told Russ I’d had enough; that I was tired of letting myself be treated poorly, that I knew it wasn’t personal, that the work wasn’t to get his son to change how he felt, but that was for ME to change where I’d been inauthentic – pretending it was okay. It WASN’T okay (it’s been a year and a half we’ve been dating, and the divorce was long before I was on scene anyway), and that Russ lets him get away with it bothers me as much as anything else.

    If I’d have asked myself these questions a while ago, acknowledging it before it got that bad, it wouldn’t have led to such an emotional scene in the parking lot – on his birthday, no less. lol

    But hey, holidays are my favorite breakup days anyway. lol

    The strange thing, though, just saying it – expressing it! – made me feel better!! Plus my brilliant relationship coach (who still won’t let me give out her name because she’s not taking new clients) gave me good reinforcement on boundary setting and insight on how this was about Russ and his son – nothing to do with me.

    Completing the two statements can lead to acknowledgement of powerful internal – sometimes hidden – truths. And sooner is better than later, I’ve found. lol

  • Peregrine John says:

    This makes much more sense than Ruiz’ similar idea in The Four Agreements that one must “be impeccable with your word.” I’ve relegated that book to the Occasionally Insightful list, but before that, that particular item confused me mightily. Now, this is in no small part because of a difference in culture of thought, and I would have said “tell the truth” instead, and that would not have connected well with all people. I get that, now, and may blather on about it in my own blog some time.

    Now this rather more clear description of holistic integrity comes along and resonates like a giant bronze bell. Parts of a huge, unwieldy puzzle, assembled in sections, are starting to align in ways that I’ve no hope of explaining before more coffee is in me.

    Sorry, no stories yet for this; but I have a notion that a flood of them are about to come bobbing to the surface.

  • Vanessa says:

    I love this post Jeanette.

    God, you want examples….how long have you got?
    But one that sprang to mind was this:
    “I’ve been pretending (for the sake of my husband”) that the things (usually with negative under-tones, or just plain insults) my mother-in-law says to me just bounce off me and don’t affect me”
    “The truth is I really can’t stand her”. Sssh, don’t tell anyone this huge secret I’ve been carrying around with me. In fact I usually give up the will to live after being in her company for more than a few hours. There! I’ve said it.
    But you know what? I actually feel good finally saying it.

    I guess it’s worse when you pretend for someone else, as in my case for my husband.Even so, it still feels good.

    What do you think?

    p.s thanks Jeanette for the lovely comments you made on my blog.

  • Good Vibe Coach says:

    How about that, huh? Just around the corner, a turnaround that allows us to get headed in the right direction.

    I think we always have those corners and turnarounds. We don’t always take advantage, that’s for sure, but just knowing they’re always there makes me feel better. So we could never be going too long somewhere wrong. 🙂

    Or maybe even better – no such thing as a wrong direction.

    Fun thoughts to play with.

    Thanks for introducing a new one here, my friend. Much appreciated!

  • Anonymous says:

    OMG I have done exactly that, once driving with my kids when they were little and making a pit stop for one of them. I got back onto the highway and realized I was going the WRONG direction. My poor sweet sons, I was swearing and crying scared we were fated to be ending up in the wrong town. Just a few feet away there was an exit that got me turned around.
    So my point being just around the corner was a turnaround that got me going in the right direction.

    Love Leslie

  • Good Vibe Coach says:

    I love it when results are that immediate!! If only “I” acted as swiftly as the Universe .. lol!

    Thanks for sharing your story, Anonymous! Good for you!

  • Anonymous says:

    An ex boyfriend of mine was making me extremely unhappy being really selfish and inconsiderate. The day we ended the relationship, even though I was sad I knew it was for the best and the next day I got a promotion at work that I had been visualising to no avail for months before hand.
    I also stated eating more healthily as this was another area I had been neglacting and noticed that that improved my personal relationships too!!

  • Good Vibe Coach says:

    Yes, our responses to these statements to help flesh out where we might not be living out our true selves can be insightful and certainly entertaining. And I LOVE it when we don’t use them to make ourselves wrong or bad.

    Just helpful info – a little flashlight in the dark theater guiding us back to our seats.

    Or sometimes it can feel like a much bigger redirection than that – like when you discover you’ve been heading east on a freeway you meant to be going west on.

    Either way, it’s okay. We’re enjoying our journey, right? We’ll catch the next exit and make a course correction. Laughing at and loving ourselves along the way, right?

    We are SO entertaining!!

    Thanks for your posts, Leslie. This is not a topic for the “weak of stomach.” lol

  • Anonymous says:

    I just realized that both stories I told had a similar theme. I am worried about other people’s reactions. And I noticed my giving isn’t too clean either LOL. An interesting connection is that I have had the complaint that I don’t have a balance of give and take in my life. That it has felt like give give most of the time.
    Lol, darn if it doesn’t always comes back to you. May I learn to give more cleanly so I will create more room to recieve cleanner.

    Love Leslie

  • Anonymous says:

    Thanks Jeannette and Paulette for both your comments. I agree I love this feng shui concept of LOA!

    And truthfully not so easy an exercise, you have to scan for the unhappy bits. But then I was floored by your example and realized the depth to the shifts a person could make. And of course it is all so very connected.

    Sometimes I think I operate with little integrity. I bought my husband a book for father’s day and he grunted and made no comments. So it sat on our bookshelf for 4 months untouched. I have a cousin who had a birthday and I am feeling uncomfortable about not doing a reading for her sister and so I was feeling extra guilty and decided the book I bought her was not enough and put the book I had given Alfred in the parcel as well.

    Of course the other day he said where is that book you gave me I will take it fishing with me. I had to run to the bookstore and buy another copy which gratefully there was another copy and say well here it is. Groan so pathetic. I was thinking could you maybe have a little more integrity Leslie and just leave the present you gave him alone. I suppose I gave the book with hooks, ie expectations of a reaction LOL. And I noticed I justified my actions with that reason, well he didn’t seem pleased with the book.
    And obviously I have some issue around my cousins that I don’t want to do a reading for my older cousin. Sigh, she has always thought I was wierd.

    Lol and?

    Love Leslie

  • Good Vibe Coach says:

    Thanks for (almost) sharing, Paulette! lol

    You know, every time I run those statements through my head I come up with another insightful answer!! I’m starting to realize I have a fair amount of work to do!

    Oh well, it’s all good. If nothing else, it just proves what fascinating creates we are, huh?! Nice to get a glimpse of our hard core truth now and again. 🙂

  • Paulette says:

    Hi Jeanette,

    I love this post, and the whole idea of the necessity of integrity in our personal lives and authenticity to manifest what we want totally resonates.

    “I’ve been pretending that … “

    “The truth is that … “

    OK, so I am privately resonating in my authenticity and personal sense of integrity!

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