Lisa's Identity Check
If you’ve ever concluded divine timing was taking longer than expected, it might be worth checking the vibe to see if who you’re being is the holdup …
Lisa Hayes shares how engaging a handful of new “data points” as part of her identity shift is manifesting her wildly successful new book. Here’s Lisa:
A full year ago I was inspired to write a book.
I started on January 1st and gave myself a daily writing goal. I stayed on schedule and by February 10th it was finished and off to the publisher. I thought it would be published and to market by April.
A lot of things got in the way. Life caused me to miss important editing and marketing deadlines. My publisher was patient, but gently let me know every time I missed a deadline that we were pushing it back, not by days, but maybe months.
Weeks and months did pass and I made peace with the fact it would launch when it was time. I told myself I couldn’t control that timing, and it would be perfect whenever it happened. I wasn’t exactly procrastinating. I just figured the stars weren’t aligned.
A few days ago as I was pondering my new year plan and decided to take it in a different direction this year. Instead of making a bunch of plans or picking a word, I opted to tease out a new identity.
Who would I be if that book was a wild, game-changing success?
I started making a list of what I call data points. I am still shooting for 100. I haven’t made it yet, but the list is growing.
I asked myself questions like:
- How would I manage my schedule differently?
- What would I wear?
- What thoughts would I think?
- What would I eat?
- What would my office and home look like?
- What behaviors would be different than they are now?
I thought about the deep penetrating details of who I would be. I got gut check honest with myself.
The big shocker in this process was an eye opener …
I am nowhere near as close to being that woman as I thought I was.
I know the drill when it comes to identity shifting and honestly, I was doing a half-assed job. Basically, I was fooling myself because the evidence in my physical world told a very different story.
I thought I was doing a pretty good job of being a wildly successful author – but there was no book in sight. That kind of evidence doesn’t lie.
So, even though the list isn’t complete, last week I started getting very deliberate about making some changes and upgrades. I’ve been very intentional about things in a way I wasn’t before. It’s taking some effort, but I’m better off for it in a number of ways.
A couple days ago I got an email from the publisher scheduling a final conference call with the marketing department for next week. A smart girl would have noticed the evidence shifting in response to my identity upgrade. I totally missed it.
I just kept adding data points to my list and incrementally implementing changes in my environment, my behavior, and my thoughts. It started to feel like a game to check the boxes I could, day in and day out.
I can’t say I’m there yet, but I do know I’m closer.
Want to know how I know that??
Last night I was searching on Amazon for another book, completely unrelated, written by someone else, that I wanted to send to a client. I was having a hard time finding it.
As I was typing in every key word I could think of, guess what book came up in my search.
My book, I wrote, that wasn’t even suppose to be there yet.
Mic drop moment.
I shot off an email to the publisher who responded by telling me the printing house must have been ahead of schedule. He didn’t even know it was there. He told me we’d proceed with our promo plan for early next year as planned.
Here’s the thing … All those months it wasn’t the stars that weren’t aligned. It was me. I had a lot more control over the timing than I wanted to admit.
Identity is a powerful thing. It’s also specifically unique. What I believe might be a behavior or a belief for a crazy successful author might be very different that what you think it might be. There is no one recipe. However, I do have beliefs, and until I started conforming to them, nothing was ever going to shift.
The minute I got honest about where I was with my identity and putting the pieces to shift in place, the wheels on the bus started turning pretty quick.
Easy? Not always.
Worth it? Hell yeah.
What you want to do next year doesn’t matter. It’s irrelevant.
My question for you is this:
Who do you want to be in 2016?
Instead of planning the what, I highly suggest you start becoming and morphing into the who.
It might just save you some time. It would have saved me a year.
Lisa Hayes is the Love Whisperer and author of Score Your Soulmate, apparently now available on Amazon.