LOA Parenting InterviewWhen it comes to law of attraction parenting, these coaches walk their talk.
They use deliberate creation to raise their own families and are who I rely on for high vibing support at Good Vibe University. I was delighted when all three accepted my request for an interview on the art of LOA parenting!
Here are Julie Masters, Lesley Reid Cross and Sara Garcia answering the big LOA parenting questions:
1. What does it mean to be practice LOA friendly parenting?
Julie: It is the intention to parent in the present moment, recognizing that whatever is happening, is a mutual creation, rather than your child trying to get their way at the expense of yours.
Lesley: For me LOA friendly parenting is simply following my essential self, the most positive loving clear part of myself, rather than social messages about what good parenting is. The biggest skill I engage is listening to my body and stepping back when I feel tense, tight and constrained. To be a clear, loving and positive parent, I need to embody those qualities myself in my relationship with my children and take a time out to feel my way through when I’m not.
Sara: My process started with a clear desire to enjoy parenthood and parenting, which led me to teachers and books that validated the possibility that parenting didn’t have to be a laborious experience. For me being an loa-style mom means letting my guidance system be in the driver’s seat of my decision making, allowing my children to lure me into my vortex as often as possible, embracing my inherent wholeness, and generally expecting that Life will be good.
2. What makes LOA savvy parenting different from traditional parenting?
Julie: It allows for a different degree of flexibility, because you recognize that you both, as a parent and as a child, have unique needs and desires that are always shifting and changing–hence the importance of the commitment to be present. There are no formulas for schedules and rules – only unique arrangements.
Lesley: In relatively modern western parenting, say the past few hundred years, most ideas are about power: who has power and control over whom. LOA savvy parenting is more akin to that of older societies, particularly the peaceful ones. There’s a level of personal sovereignty recognized for every person, regardless of age, as well as deeper and more intuitive connections between individuals. And a trust in the idea that one’s inner guidance is the best and most positive impulse regardless of how it appears to an observer. An LOA savvy parent will take the role of mentor and partner more than that of a teacher, ruler or supervisor.
Sara: For me, the primary difference is that as an loa-style mom I’m (usually) showing up to life understanding my creative power and the value of all emotions & experiences. That affords me the pleasure of being emotionally available and present with my children in their moments of contrast. Whereas if I’m working hard to manage and control their moods, I’m more likely to feel drained and disconnected from what I want. Knowing the value of contrast, I have less resistance to the broad range of feelings they can potentially experience in a day. And because of that non-resistance, being there with my children in their upset moments is actually more of a pleasure than a drainer. This mindset is what allows the bumps in the road to become part of the fun!
3. What’s the biggest challenge you see for those using deliberate creation in child-rearing?
Julie: My biggest challenge was/is the fear, and often consequence, of being judged for what I do or don’t do as a parent. There are so many cultural beliefs and ideas about what a “good” parent is.
Lesley: Continuing to follow the social self and ingrained and unexamined rules about what makes a “good parent.” Much of that “conventional wisdom” is about controlling a child’s experiences and deciding what their outcome should be without the child’s input. In different social circles these rules can be polar opposites, but following any without a gut check and without acknowledging the child’s desires is the most common way I’ve seen parents move out of their vortex and steer their children away from theirs.
Sara: When I embarked on loa parenting, I was immediately met with the vibrations of my own childhood and the ways in which I was parented. At first this caused me to make an enemy of my conditioning, which just made things worse! So my biggest challenge has been to embrace who I really am and release deeply rooted contrast without making a villain of it. The big lesson has been realizing that the more I invite the old conditioning to stay, the easier it is to stay aligned with who I truly am.
4. How would you suggest moms and dads begin leveraging LOA in their parenting?
Julie: Adding LOA friendly responses, and expecting them to be “tested.” However, children recognize energy shifts very, very, quickly, so if your own energy is clear about it, they will respond very rapidly, in my experience. And, of course, practicing living your own LOA conscious life!
Lesley: Observe yourself as a parent and observe and interact with your children as whole, complete, sovereign people. Pay attention to the sensations in your body while you interact with your children. Any sense of tightness, heaviness, constriction – even and especially when it’s accompanied with a feeling of self-righteousness (in my experience there’s no bigger tip off to the sway of the social self) is a sign to step back and reconsider, even if it has to happen after the fact. Lean into interactions with your children that feel wonderful and engage in more of them. Connect. Have fun together. Question everything your mind tells you is “necessary.”
Sara: Think of a relationship that is really easy for you to feel good in – whomever you feel easiest, most comfortable, and most free being around. And simply contemplate: what would it be like if I could feel this easy and good with my child(ren)? What might it feel like if I could be more of my true self with my kids? What kind of mannerisms and behaviors come naturally when I feel my best? Whatever insights come in response to those kinds of questions, pick the things that feel easiest to implement and intend that you’ll feel more inspired to do those things more often.
5. What are you most proud of in your parenting?
Julie: So many things make me proud, but I would say that the main thing is that they FOLLOW their OWN hearts! And that I have amazing, open, respectful relationships with all of them. I think that the belief that made the biggest difference in my own LOA style of parenting is that I had NO expectations of who they were, or what they would be interested in, or what they would do with their lives. I mainly created a safe container for them to explore what they came here to explore, got out of the way, and watched with total amazement!
Lesley: What always makes the most difference- accepting my kids for who they are, exactly how they are in each moment, age and stage. Allowing, appreciating and making space for their differences, quirks and emotions, and my own. Turning towards love for my kids and myself no matter what is happening on the outside. (I don’t always succeed.)
Sara: I’m most proud of how much fun I’m having. The happier I’ve allowed myself to get, the more my parenting style seems to entrain with that. My best tip for parents – know that because life experience is the best teacher, you need not bend over backwards to teach your children what they need to learn to have a good life. Life is already helping them with that. Your job is to show more, tell less. Show them how good life can be with your own willingness to align with and allow what you uniquely and deliciously want. Now is always the right time and it’s never too late.
6. What’s one thing you would want every aspiring LOA parent to know?
Julie: That it’s one of the most (for me the most) enlightening, inspiring, entertaining, fun, mind blowing and heart opening, experience you could ever have! And you never have to deal with being the guard for a grounded child!!
Lesley: Children are complete, whole beings with their own inner guidance and desires. Trust them.
Sara: That your vortex can be the rule rather than the exception. If you know that’s what you want, you know what to do.
You can find more wisdom from Julie Masters here on facebook, and from Lesley Cross at Euphoria Life Design Studio. And Sara Garcia is online at Vibrational Movement.