Measurements That Matter

Deliberate creators know the “secret” is all about feeling good.

When we find ways to feel good, we create the vibrational alignment that ushers in the good stuff we’ve been wanting.

The challenge we sometimes face when it comes to feeling good is taking a measurement of reality.

Like balancing the checkbook. Or stepping on the scale. Or listening to voice mails for the message we’ve been waiting for.

Sometimes that measurement – or score – supports our feel good vibe; often it doesn’t.

So what’s a deliberate creator to do? Never again consult something that might jeopardize our fantasy of things getting better?

(I personally don’t think that’s a bad idea!)

But Abraham’s advice is simply not to take score too soon.

Earlier this week someone asked what to do when she’s been feeling good consistently and then steps on the scale to find that nothing has changed.

I’d reminded her the importance of self-love and self-appreciation for weight loss, and asked whether she would weigh someone she loved; whether her feelings about them would be dependent on what the scale reported. Which was a ridiculous thought – of course we don’t condition our love on our sweetheart’s weight. Why then would it be any different for us?

What should she be measuring then? she wanted to know. The inches with a tape measure? Or the fit of old clothes?

No, none of that!

“If you have to measure something, measure how you feel.”

Because that’s all that matters.

When the goal is simply to feel good, taking score loses importance. But if you insist on marking progress (which many say since we get what we focus on, measuring progress is a good idea), measure what really matters: your vibration.

If I felt better marking progress by measuring the vibe, I’d do it with an eye toward feeling better.

So if I’m feeling like 7 on the ten point scale, what would take me to 7.5? More comfortable clothes? If that one “ugh” appointment wasn’t on the books? If it was movie night?

Incorporate your answers into your day.

Getting caught up in “what is” is easy to do, so learning the habit of focusing on what you’re creating rather than what you’ve already created is super helpful.

Having said that, there are times when I do take stock. Β I look at the big money picture a couple times a year; I occasionally look up GVU and blog stats for fun. But only if it is for fun, not out of need or worry.

There are two conditions I require be present before taking score:

  • I’m feeling pretty freakin’ good (aka In The Vortex, to you Abers) and
  • I have good reason to believe I’ll like what I see.

Which is why I don’t know what I weigh right now but do know my calves are looking fabulous; I’m not sure how the stocks have done but know the gold account is up 30%; I don’t know how many unread emails I have, but know there’s one from Frank Butterfield suggesting a joint venture with Communion of Light that really lights me up. I have no idea how many times I’ve been broken up with, but I remember the really nice first kisses.

Focusing on what we know feels good sets us up for success.

And focusing on what matters keeps us on good track.

The contrast will work its way in whenever it does, and learning to manage it by taking the dip then keeping an eye towards what does feel good is powerful deliberate creation.

My advice? Β Pay attention to what you’re measuring and whether it’s serving your vibe or not. Β The “How do I feel right now?” and “What would feel even better?” questions serve well. Β And …

If it’s a score you absolutely have to take, find a way to feel good (or at least better) about it beforehand.

  1. Intend you’ll like what you see
  2. Think of the reasons to believe it’ll be good news, and above all
  3. Remind yourself that how you feel isn’t dependent on what it says.

When you get conscious about managing your energy, you can’t help but make good progress toward your dreams come true.

  • September 18, 2010
  • M(onika) says:

    Dear Jeannette,
    thanks so much for the great Abraham quote!
    And yes, please … do write lots of new Blog entries … πŸ™‚
    You are so lovely, your pretty face is like a shining flower and your whole being is so lovely. What a great place you have created here, and all the awesome people I can meet here.

  • This Abraham quote is relevant to this topic, too:
    We find you loving of yourself quite often. And we find you absolutely loveable. And we believe with everything that we are that if it were not for your comparison of yourself to others…
    Oh Here it is! This is really what is at the heart of all this!
    So, all of you stand where you do and you launch rockets of different things that you want. And you conclude that others are already living what you want and you’re not. And you gather that information by comparing the smiles on their faces and the words that they speak and the things they write in their books and the movies they show you. So you use their success as a club that works against you as you compare them getting what they want and pointing out to you, that in some instances, you’re not getting what you want.
    Guest: That’s right!
    Abraham: And what we want you to understand is that you cannot accurately compare what anyone is getting because you have no way of assessing their points of vibrational relativity. And what they appear to be showing you and what they are actually living are two very different things.
    Don’t you know people that have all the money in the world and are still dissatisfied? Don’t you know people that are living in what you think is your dream house who are dissatisfied with it? Don’t you find it amazing that people who OUGHT to be happy under the conditions that you think you are reaching for aren’t?
    And doesn’t it sort of point out to you that you just can’t compare anything anyone else is living with what you are living?
    Caribbean Cruise 4/8/06

  • You know what’s been in my mind lately on this one, Suzie? That quote from Abraham where Esther said to Jerry something like, “It doesn’t matter how beautiful our monster bus, or how many homes we own, or how many best selling books we write; if we’re not in joy, we have failed.”
    Talk about getting your attention on what REALLY matters, huh? I love that!

  • Suzie Cheel says:

    Focusing on what we know feels good sets us up for success.
    And focusing on what matters keeps us on good track.”
    This stood out for me- remembering to focus on what matter makes me feel good- it is when i focus on the other stuff that I lose focus and don’t feel good
    Thanks for the inspiration

  • You’re so right, Kim, in that much of this score-keeping is cultural conditioning. How empowering for us to choose for OURSELVES rather than what we’ve been trained.
    I loved the PSS on your note!!

  • Kim Falconer says:

    This is such a wonderful post. It is so basic for us to want to keep score. It makes me think of games, sports, competitions, all the things we grew up with. Our self-worth waits for the results!
    The question is, who exactly are we competing with when we get on the scales or check the bank account, stats or measuring tape? Our cultural paradigm is based on keeping score, grading our efforts from A to F, and constantly evaluating our ‘progress’. Break out of this one and we let go of a huge limiting belief – that our life is not valuable unless we are told it is by a score card.
    What a great reminder, Jeannette! Thank you!
    πŸ™‚ Kim
    PS, I had a husband once who told his wife (after me) that if she didn’t loose weight he would leave her. His brother did the same thing (with his own wife). If that gets anybody’s hackles up, keep it as a reminder not to do it to yourself!
    PSS, Ex’s wife is still with ex and still on a diet. Ex-brother-in-law’s wife divorced him and lived happily ever after πŸ™‚

  • Monika, I got goosebumps reading your post! So lovely to hear!!
    Thanks for adding your current experience to this conversation – very inspiring!
    PS – no, you did NOT tell me that, but you’re making me want to post more often if that’s the case! lol

  • M(onika) says:

    Jeannette, have I yet told you that I love your Blog and come here every day to read? xxxxxxxxxx

  • M(onika) says:

    Dear all,
    I am in the midst of the experience that my ‘little wishes’ that I uttered 3 months ago are not that important anymore, now that I have been *in the vortex* for a while, now that I know what it feels like. Now that I know that the most important thing in my life is: to feel good! πŸ™‚ I have almost completely forgotten about my wishing to lose weight … and my wishing for more money …
    I simply want to feel good, it does not matter if I lose weight as long as I feel good and do not beat myself up for my figure that doesn’t look like a teenager’s anymore. I want to feel good; it doesn’t matter if I earn 5,000 a month as long as I am contented and as long as I feel I have everything I want.
    I have forgotten to step on the scale or measure my waist or write all the things I eat in my food journal or calculate the calories … πŸ˜‰
    I want to feel good, that’s all that matters!
    Mucho well-being and lots of good feelings to you all <3

  • Is this our regular Jessica who is giving me such great help with the Paradoxes (draft) post?

  • Jessica says:

    I like it. I like it a lot.

  • Cool quote. I’m wondering, Susan, if you have ideas of what that “surrender” might look like in a real life example?

  • If you find your life situation unsatisfactory or even untolerable, it is only by surrendering first that you can break the unconscious resistance pattern that perpetuates that situation. Eckhart Tolle

  • Headed over there next, Shimigirl … thanks for the heads up!

  • Shimigirl says:

    Thank you for your inspiring, affirming blog. It helps me realign my vibrations when i get a bit low. My issue is to connect with you. Please read my posts on breaking up in the vortex.
    Thanks from Australia

  • Julio Blanco says:

    Good thing the batteries ran out on both my sports watch and my bike speedometer ages ago and I just haven’t gotten around to replacing them. So there I am, out there running and biking, without any digital feedback telling me if I’m anywhere close to as fast as when I was in my 20s (the “peak” of my athletic abilities). Instead, I’m just a middle-aged guy out there, putting one foot in front of the other, pushing my crank up the hills around Boulder, CO. And golly-gee-willickers, it just feels good. ‘nuf said. Thanks for giving me a new vibemeter for my runs and bike rides!

  • I like your style, Julio! You just captured the essence of this post with that example – thank you!

  • Well said, Nancy!
    It IS challenging to tell the new story with a lot of scores taking place.
    In fact, I know some deliberate creators make up “pretend” scores to support the new story, like a bank account statement with some extra zeroes added in, or a photoshopped picture for the fridge, etc.

  • I so agree, Jeannette. Not taking score is part of telling the new story. If your old story including 100 checks on *what is* during the course of every hour so you could beat yourself up further, then the score-taking needs releasing along with the old story!
    Don’t take score unless/until it feels good to do so, and in the meantime, MILK the feel good thoughts!
    Many blessings,

  • Indeed, Lin. “Line up first.” And once we’re lined up – the measurements just don’t seem as important. At least, that’s been my experience.
    Glad you liked the post!
    Speaking of likable posts, I was just talking with a girlfriend about how much I’m already looking forward to your next guest post here. lol
    Loved your 80/20 post! (

  • Lin E says:

    you keep giving me the tiny missing pieces of the giant puzzle. It make a whole lot of sense… don’t measure anything if you aren’t already lined up with what you’re creating… so that no matter what the information is, you’re fine either way. Otherwise, don’t ask, right?
    I was doing it backwards.
    Thank you,

  • Yes, MissyB, if making friends with “feel bad” measurements is easier than not measuring at all, you’re on the right track. Path of least resistance is the way to go – and no one else can tell you what that is for you!
    Thanks for reading and for launching the discussion, my friend.

  • MissyB says:

    I like the basis of this…but I also want to see if I can make friends with the measurements that feel bad.
    For example…when I get on the scales and they tell me to get off, I’m going through ho’oponopono (still prefer hopping to writing that!) I am hoping that if I can make peace with it then it won’t feel bad.
    I worry that if I feel good, and don’t keep check on bank and weight balances, well I’ll spend and eat more than is required.
    Not sure I can let go on this….

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