Official Retraction: Russ' Money Love
Russ says he said $3, not $30 (from today’s ezine issue on Money Love):
“Are you kidding me?” my boyfriend exclaimed as I went back to the store for a sack of groceries I left behind. It was $11 worth of food that he didn’t think was worth the trip back. “I piss away more than that every day.”
He said he blows through $30 every day without second thought. Paying extra for gas here, buying expensive lunch there, never thinking of a coupon or shopping for the best deal. (Russ also says he uses a credit card that gives him ten cents off every gallon. I stand corrected!)
He’s more into convenience than counting pennies.
Which is fine. For him. (Apparently. He rolls in the dough, so something’s working.)
I, on the other hand, treat money differently. I don’t “blow” it and I certainly wouldn’t “piss it away.” I even cringe at the thought of using that word in reference to money. How disrespectful!
Since we moved in together, my boyfriend’s behavior around money is getting new attention from me. I might not have cared before, but one joint checking account later it’s a new story.
As I considered whether I should counsel him in the error of his ways (that was my judgment about his treating money “disrespectfully”), I remembered that it isn’t our behavior that matters – it’s the feeling that matters.
Because we get what we vibrate. The action doesn’t make the difference – our vibration does.
So if he feels good about blowing cash, that’s a fine vibe to flow. Incomprehensible as it may be to me.
And if I’ve learned anything about money, it’s that we each feel differently about it!
Example: I love not balancing my checkbook. Ever.
Yes, I briefly glance over a monthly statement to make sure charges look familiar and appropriate, and that works for me.
Much different than when I followed my CFP-trained advice to track every penny that came into and out of my life for an entire year. Ugh! I was supposed to learn financial responsibility and become enlightened about how money worked in my life, but all it taught me was how to get really kinked up about it.
My girlfriend, on the other hand, delighted in it. She loved this newfound power over money. Loved feeling in charge of it, knowing where it was coming and where it was going at all times.
Didn’t do that for me.
Russ is the opposite. He enters all his expenses in a Quicken spreadsheet. The guy who burns through $30 a day carelessly. (Again, it’s $3, not $30. Sorry, sweetie. I really thought you said $30.) And he thinks I’M irresponsible for not balancing my checkbook.
Aren’t we funny?
Thankfully I know better than to believe I know what’s best for him. What’s best for him – indeed for each of us – is to do what feels good. Whatever that is, whether it’s paying ten cents more per gallon at our favorite gas station or driving back to the grocery store for $11 worth of food left behind.
I’m also learning it feels best not to worry about how he treats money (although I may have to remind myself that a time or two again).
* * * * * *
In order to have the financial experience we want in life (whatever that looks like for each of us), we need to create vibational alignment to it. That’s how we create anything, including money: we feel it first, then it happens.
Most people I work with want an abundance of easy money coming their way. They want to feel good about their finances and for it to fund all their wild dreams come true.
(I’ll refrain from my lecture about putting money on the hook for making your dreams come true.)
Anyway – in order to experience that kind of love from money, we’ve got to flow the love towards it. Because money responds to how we feel about it.
So if you feel uptight about it, money will be uptight with you. If you feel easy about money, it gets easy with you. If you treat money disrespectfully, it will seem disrespectful to you.
Money is nothing but a mirror of our own feelings about it!
Thus, if you’re wanting money to show up abundantly, effortlessly, easily and naturally, your work is to feel abundant, effortless and easy about money. You get what you vibrate.
So don’t expect you can be worried about cash and get any experience other than more cash-flow worries.
Rather, ask yourself how money’s treating you, and look at how you’re treating it. If you like what you see, full steam ahead! Don’t worry what anyone else thinks, because all that matters is how you feel.
If you don’t like what you see, consider a change.
You can learn to treat money the way you want to be treated. Relax about it, be easier on this topic, look for reasons to thank it, say nice things to it. It will respond quickly to your new vibe, but you really have to shift the vibe – not just say the words. You can’t fool the Universe.
There’s another important aspect that I taught an entire 5 week course on, but will sum up in a couple sentences: If you’re loving money but it’s not loving you back, check in on how you feel about your Self. After all, Universe can only be as good to you as you are to your Self.
When you flow the love to yourself as well as money, you’re a surefire hit for whatever money dreams you entertain! (And if you want professional support in that, that’s what I’m here for.)