The Power of Ingratitude

the power of ingratitudeYes, I’m committing LOA sacrilege this Thanksgiving by extolling the virtues of being ungrateful.

Because honestly, I’ve written so much about the power of appreciation and thankfulness that it seems like it’s worth looking at it from a new angle.

So, for those of us who are inundated with holiday reminders to be appreciative, let’s look at when it serves us to be ungrateful:

When it makes you happier …

Actually, ingratitude isn’t known for making us feel better.  Feeling unthankful is kind of the opposite direction of happiness. hmm.  Let’s try again …

Because it attracts more good things …

Yeah, not so much.  When we’re focused on things we don’t like, we’re attracting more things we don’t like.  So lack of thankfulness isn’t likely bringing good things in.

It makes the world a better place …

Ausonius once said: “Nothing more detestable does the earth produce than an ungrateful man.”  I, for one, prefer to be around appreciative people than chronic complainers and I know I’m not alone.  So this reason doesn’t really fly, either.

Ingratitude isn’t looking all that powerful yet.

But there are at least two times when it probably really is genuinely empowering to feel unthankful.

That’s when you feel unthankful.  Because feeling what you feel is the only way to go.  And we don’t get out of a particular feeling state by avoiding, denying or resisting it. We move through it by feeling it.

So when you feel unappreciative, own it.  That’s when it’s a good time feel ungrateful.

The other truly empowering element of ungratefulness is that it spotlights what you DON’T want, and that contrast just inspires more desire.  That is apparently an important part of the manifesting equation.  One we often forget.

So it can be argued true that ingratitude does serves us in a couple of ways.

But by far and away, if you’re looking to live a life you love and to get what you want, appreciation is probably the way to go.

And that’s probably why we hear so many reminders to consciously and deliberately redirect our thoughts to feel thankful.  That’s where the sweet spot is.

Here’s to finding your sweet spot this Thanksgiving holiday, and (most of) the other days, too.  🙂

  • November 21, 2012
  • Paul Akpomukai says:

    One of the best ways to practise the law of attraction is to forget the things which are behind you and reach forward towards the things which are before you.

  • Jeanette
    I agree, sometimes snarky is just what the universe ordered! I feel what i feel, all kinds of things – resentment, joy, sadness, hopelessness, silly and more. These are my feelings – not labels of who I am.
    I say: Have ’em, claim ’em and more on to the next better one!
    good post girl!

  • Anna, I can totally see that about you! 🙂

  • Omgosh, Julie!!! That point actually deserves a whole post of its own! That is SO insightful AND interesting, don’t you think?!
    At least it is to me – thanks for mentioning it here!!!

  • Anna says:

    My favourite type of ingratitude/ungratefulness makes me laugh – and laugh and laugh and laugh! It may be a snappy comeback, snide comment, brief rant – *especially* when it’s delivered well. I also find it tremendously therapeutic. There’s a reason I like Modern Family, Seinfeld, Murphy Brown, Roseanne…

  • Here is another time when being “not grateful” serves you (perhaps that is a little different from being ungrateful, but it’s an interesting point nonetheless):
    When you are imagining having what you want, you might imagine it to be so ordinary in your life that you would not actively be grateful for it. For example, as the Communion of Light would say, we aren’t always appreciative of having running water, because when we have something it tends to become ordinary. So, when you are imagining having something you want, you can imagine it being so ordinary that you are just taking it for granted.
    It’s a different kind of tool. Since you’re on the subject.

  • Good point, Lisa! I know I’ve experienced that power of HUGE contrast after I let go of the resistance. In fact, that’s where some of my best manifesting stories come from.

  • Stephen says:

    I love that we can be thankful, cranky, wise, silly, severe, thoughtless, goofy, dismayed, despicable, desperate, ungrateful, unabashed, unafraid, disgruntled, disturbed, distraught, dastardly, delightful, strong, weak, furious, curious, delirious, bigoted, blighted, bloated, monstrous, preposterous, ambidextrous, courageous, outrageous, dangerous and everything else a person can feel,
    It’s all good.
    Many blessings to you, Jeannette.

  • Lisa says:

    Excellent post, as always.
    I’ve got one more, that you taught me. The rubber band effect. Quite possibly the more ungrateful I allow myself to feel the more contrast I’m really warming up, so when the rubber band releases I’d shoot way out into my vortex.

  • Thank you, Terri! 🙂
    And Jrnnigrt, one of these days I really want to learn how to pronounce your name! lol

  • Jrnnigrt says:

    so, appreciate your desires, and use ‘unappreciative’ feelings to stand your ground for the rest 🙂

  • TerriC says:

    Incisive, creative, clear, helpful and uniquely wise – my gratitude for Jeannette. You ace the position of insightful perspective again!! Thank you for describing the terrain from your vantage-point (how DO you find these resting points? So delightful!!) Thank you so much. 🙂

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