Q&A: Can I Use LOA to Get the Guy?

QAThis question comes from a reader wondering whether law of attraction can help get the guy.
Here’s her question:

If there is a specific man I want to date/have in my life, can I use LOA to have him?
I met this really great guy, and I think we’d be a good match. But how can I get my energies to flow to attract him to me? The only connection I have to him is his sister (who adores him and thinks we’d be a good match, too).

This question comes up so often in my coaching practice that this topic alone could keep me in business. Let’s cover the ins and outs here as to whether it’s possible to attract a particular person into our love life.
Thanks in advance for your input, everyone!
Update: one of our fabulous commenters (M.) posted this video that many are finding helpful on this topic:
Just wanted to make sure everyone who was interested in this topic had a chance to see it.
This one is super juicy, too. (Thanks, Kellie!)

  • September 8, 2010
  • Short answer is YES!! You can absolutely use the LOA to attract a specific person in your life… been there, done that, several times! 🙂
    However, it’s more important to focus on the qualities you are desiring in a relationship and in a mate, rather than a specific person, because Uni sees the bigger picture and may actually be able to bring you an even better person than the one you are currently desiring! Sometimes we get so caught up in one person and convinced that they’re perfect for us, that we stop focusing on what we *really* want in a relationship… and even if we get the guy/girl, we may realize they’re not everything we thought they were!
    As long as you keep focusing on the qualities you are looking for in a partner and a relationship, you will ultimately attract that to you… either from this specific person, or someone even better for you! It’s important to not get too attached to one particular person, though. As long as we stay focused on what we want, we will absolutely get that… in one form or another.
    Good luck! 🙂

  • Jeannette says:

    Thanks for leading us off with a clear answer, Mary!
    I’ve done it myself, too, although knowing what I know now, I wouldn’t repeat it.
    What I WOULD do is exactly what you suggested: get dialed in on what we REALLY want, knowing that Universe will very likely deliver it better and bigger than we had our sights on originally.
    The one thing I see people doing who are focused on manifesting a particular person/job/investor, etc. is getting “attached” to it/him/her. Which of course doesn’t work well.
    Getting clear about the essence of our true desire helps refocus and release the attachment.
    Thanks for starting this conversation, Mary!

  • Robert says:

    I understand that it is common for teenage girls to hang a poster on their wall of someone that represents their “dream guy.” And I heard that as a teenager Katie Holmes had a picture of Tom Cruise hanging on her wall. Katie Holmes is now married to Tom Cruise. Hmmm…. interesting.

  • Jeannette says:

    Robert, you’re making me wonder who was on my wall when I was a teen – ha!

  • lily says:

    I don’t think it is fair to try attracting someone particular in this way, as *you* may not be the right person for *them*. For me its not about “getting someone better” but having respect for other people and what is good for them as well as yourself. That’s not to say it isn’t understandable and part of human nature to want a particular person – but my feeling is that we should be focussing on attracting the love of someone who has the qualities of the person we like, and then opening our hearts to all people and all possibilities of love. If we’re right for the one we like, they will be free to come to us.

  • Lily, you’re making me remember … just yesterday someone was telling about how she manifested a great guy with NO list. (So she didn’t even name traits & characteristics & such, let alone identify an actual person.)
    She said if she HAD created a list or had a guy in mind, it would have been the exact opposite of who she DID end up meeting marrying. Whom she is having the love affair of a lifetime with!
    So interesting how this stuff works!

  • MissyB says:

    LOL – Robert. I had Madonna on my wall – but I’m definitely into men !
    My only reply is be careful what you wish for…because you can get who you want, but it may not be the right choice. I now realise that I unwittingly attracted two loves into my life…both ended. They weren’t who I thought they were. But I’m glad I went there…I learnt alot.
    I do believe that they must be within your radar in order to be attracted in. By that I mean there must be a mutual attraction…on your wavelength so to speak. I’m not at what length we can interfere with someones free will.

  • MissyB, my experiences were similar. I might have got the guy, but it wasn’t the EXPERIENCE that I wanted it to be.
    Much better to go direct.
    I think it was Bret Michaels and KISS that were on my wall. hee hee

  • Stephen says:

    Just shine who you are as brightly as you can. If he is your moth, he will find the flame.

  • Parul Bhargava says:

    Yes, it is possible to attract someone specific into your life using LOA (including celebrities!!!) 🙂
    I agree with the what’s been said by others’ that focusing on the essence gets you a better match. Since people might not always be as we “think” they are.

  • Stephen, you are BRILLIANT!!!

  • Parul Bhargava says:

    And Robert, I had a George Michael poster on my wall!! 🙂

  • For some reason I am getting a huge kick out of knowing who we all had on our walls growing up! lol George Michael! Madonna! ha
    Parul, did I get your summary right: “Yes, it’s possible, and no, don’t do it.” ?

  • Dave Trager says:

    Well, if LOA brought them into their experience, and they have the desire, chances are all they have to do is make a move. And if not, I think it is helpful to note what you like about that person, in the case they are there for data gathering.

  • Jeannette says:

    Dave Trager!! I want to kiss your feet today!!
    In fact, when this song came on I thought of this reader’s question and your answer to it:
    Young MC: Bust A Move
    If you want it baby you’ve got it
    Just bust a move

  • Harmony Harrison says:

    Hee hee… I’m the person that Jeannette mentioned above. Yeah – no list, no specifics at all – but a lifelong nurturing of the soulmate relationship, in my imagination and heart, long before I met him.
    Honestly, I don’t believe in manifesting a relationship with a specific person. If there’s an attachment to a specific person, the attachment can be hiding something else, some other inner need that wants to be fulfilled. By exploring that attachment, often you can unearth a lot of treasures.
    And I also believe that the desire for a specific person can get in the way of true fulfillment. But if the desire is there, if it’s real and strong, then there’s something that is asking for light, awareness, and a good helping of allowing… and then, if that individual does step forward to form a mutual relationship with you, you’re coming at it from a place of sparkling inner clarity. A much stronger place for long-term connection.

  • Oooh, I like that Harmony! “You’re automatically using LOA techniques.” Yep, it’s already happening.
    From your prior comment, I noticed you didn’t say it didn’t work or couldn’t be done to manifest a specific person, but rather not what you would necessarily advise.
    I like your “savoring someone” tip. 🙂

  • Parul Bhargava says:

    Jeannette, what I mean is, yes it’s possible and if one focuses on the essence, chances are it might turn out better.
    I wouldn’t want to take a firm stand one way or the other, since I’ve done it a bunch of times myself :).

  • Melissa says:

    Great comments! I also like what Stephen had to say. I will shine as brightly as I can (although some days I don’t feel very shiny). Harmony: so fantasizing about a specific person and how I’d feel if I was with him, is okay, and won’t interfere with LOA? I can do that! :o) Or is did you mean someone you’re already in love with?
    Jeannette, I had posters of Bruce Springsteen and Billy Idol on my walls when I was a teenager.

  • Harmony Harrison says:

    One more thing: If you’re in love with a particular person, and you’re allowing yourself to feel the love (rather than feeling, say, angst), then you’re automatically using LOA techniques. Fantasizing about conversations (and beyond), savoring the person even when they’re not there, moving into the vortex just from their scent alone…
    If you’re feeling angst and longing, rather than all vortexy, you’re still using LOA, but to a different end. As a former Queen of Unrequited Love, I know that this goes nowhere, fast.
    But savoring someone, whether they’re with you or not, is fulfillment through and through.

  • Thanks, Parul. It is easy to see you as someone who has had fun with this in a variety of ways.
    So Melissa and Harmony, what we’re saying is dive into Pure Enjoyment, right?
    Depp, Springsteen and Idol – this is just making me smile!
    And Dad just reminded me that my first poster was actually Shaun Cassiday. That’s going back a ways! lol

  • Harmony Harrison says:

    Hey Melissa, I meant that if savoring the person gets you into the vortex, and if your energy is clean and unattached, then go for it! The “clean and unattached” part helps you allow the outcome to be whatever it is. And it prevents funky cords of connection from forming between you and the unknowing beloved.
    My wall guy was Johnny Depp, circa 21 Jumpstreet. 😉

  • Amen to that, Kellie! (“… choosing a specific person only makes things much harder than they need to be.”) That dialing in on one particular person may be thinking a bit too small.
    I agree! Open it up; trust Universe to deliver what you want even better than you might know! Let it be easy and let it be even better!
    I like your style, girlfriend. 🙂

  • Lisa says:

    My motto has always been that you can use LOA to attract anything you want, just not anyone.
    This meaning, you can attract the relationship you want. You can have anything you want in that relationship. You really can have the relationship of your dreams.
    You cannot however, pick the person, specifically. Maybe the guy you have in mind is the very actor the Universe will line up for your romantic play. Maybe there is someone better for that part. Does it really matter? When you have a clear vision of the love you want, the other person is just a detail.
    I always ask my clients do you want “him” or do you want to be happy more?
    When you’re focused on your bliss, and the relationship of your dreams, and how that will make you feel, the Universe will cast the perfect man to make all of that happen – always, every time.

  • Oh dang, that’s the Lisa who would know!! Thank you for weighing in on this one, LOA Relationship Guru Lisa Hayes!
    That’s what I found, too. I could get the guy I had my eye on, but that’s what I got. Not necessarily the RELATIONSHIP I might have wanted. When I focus on the relationship, Universe brings me a perfect match for it.

  • Nathaniel says:

    It always depends on your expectation. If you expect to get the guy you will. If you are worried he might not like you or doubt that you could get him– then you wont. If you have the attitude–I could get this guy in my sleep–now you are talking.
    Move up the vibrationsal scale until you are positively expecting to be together and then move up the scale until you are extremely enthusiastic to take inspired action like asking him out. Just make sure to be in the Vortex before you have the conversation.

  • Definitely, Nathaniel – that attitude makes all the difference in the world!!

  • Amy says:

    I’d tell her to not think about him. Let the idea of him go, the universe knows what you want. Not thinking about him will be impossible at first, but will get easier over time. I think all the desire, mixed with frustration over not having him will muddy up the vibration. Since she’s already put out there what she wants, let her float down the river toward it, to use an old analogy. I also agree with everyone on here that she will then get him, or someone better!
    My wall then: Michael Jackson pre-plastic surgery and weirdness…
    My wall now: A quote from O magazine…lol

  • Kellie Conley says:

    I am loving this conversation! Years ago I tried this to no avail, but as others have mentioned I ended up completely grateful I didn’t get the guy I was after.
    From my perspective it seems choosing a specific person only makes things much harder than they need to be. As Abraham says over and over – your future YOU has already been created, the perfect relationship is already created and the only missing piece is YOU. So wouldn’t it make sense, then to remain as open as possible? It seems to me like it is thinking a bit too small – I mean if you think this person is so great, can you imagine how much better the guy in your vortex is??
    I am constantly reminding myself to trust that the Universe has my best intentions at heart and it knows MUCH better than me how to achieve them!
    I am pretty sure Michael J Fox was on my wall 🙂

  • Amy, I’d love to hear the quote on your wall now!

  • Robert says:

    I had no idea what I was starting with the wall poster comment, I was simply making an observation. When I was in High School the pictures on my wall were of the astronaugts walking on the moon. I don’t know what that says about me.

  • Janette says:

    Yes yes yes, fabulous post!
    I have had the same question for ages, but about career rather than relationship. Instead of focusing on the elements I want in a perfect career, I’ve been trying to find the one dream job – and on occasions I’ve come across what I thought was the perfect job, loved it for a period of time and then discovered it wasn’t what I thought it was. And sometimes the breakup can be ugly …
    Happily, I’ve recently made a breakthrough and I am having a wonderful time creating a career of my dreams in my vortex. I love the concept that the Universe will line up a specific job offer which will be the perfect actor in my career play! Thanks Lisa, I am totally stealing that idea LOL!!!!!

  • You are too funny, Robert!
    Janette, I love that you translated this conversation to another area in life. It IS just the same, isn’t it?!
    WOO HOO!!
    PS – love your profile pic!

  • Mariëlle says:

    I wasn’t working on a list or finding a guy when I met my current boyfriend. I was just working on having fun and loving me and letting the energy flow.
    It wasn’t love at first sight. A friend pointed him out to me but I said that I wasn’t interested because I knew he had kids. But he showed interest in me and kept persisting in a very friendly and relaxed way. One evening we got talking and suddenly I understood that there was much more about him than I had been able to see at first sight.
    We took it one day at a time, not looking ahead at all, just enjoying the moment. And this bought us both the most heavenly relationship we’ve ever been in.
    And after beeing together for almost 3 years it turns out that he’s exactly the guy I was looking for and we make such a happy couple. But that’s probably also because we speak so much about what we appreciate in each other and our relationship… 🙂
    So I would say: get happy yourself, treat yourself well, shine and sparkle and the guy will be attracted to you and present himself. Just be open to it and be willing to experience what life comes up with. It may surprise you! (And I do love suprises… haha)

  • What stood out for me in the experience you shared, Marielle:
    – he kept persisting in a very friendly and relaxed way
    – you just enjoyed the moment
    … which led to a heavenly relationship, exactly what you were looking for.
    That is walking the LOA talk, isn’t it?! No wonder you’re an LOA Coach!! 🙂
    (In my mom’s homeland, for those who are looking for LOA support in the Netherlands: http://www.tbpcoaching.com)
    Thanks for pitching in on this conversation, Marielle!

  • Monika says:

    I agree with *do not focus on one specific person*.
    I would focus on the qualities you desire, plus mega self-appreciation and self-love.
    After all, what we (should) want most is to be HAPPY, and the person, job, other circumstances we are happy with … are interchangeable; even if this sounds heartless and totally egoistic :o)

  • Monika, I think that’s so wise it deserves a spotlight, so I’ll repeat it here:
    focus on mega self-appreciation and self-love
    You’re right, of course, attaching to the job or the person is not conducive to our happiness, which is what we REALLY want.
    Thanks for saying so here!!

  • Nathaniel says:

    I say focus on one specific person. I think targeting can be really powerful. My wife wanted me. And she didn’t know if I was available or would like her but she went after me anyway. She knew I was the one for her. And she was right. When I go after specific things they work out. If I want a job–I put in one application to the place I want to work and I get it. When I want to go to college-I put one application in and get in. I always get what I want. People need that attitude.

  • Nathaniel, you’re a smart guy, so I’m tapping you for tips on how to focus on that one specific person without getting attached or obsessed or needy – you know what I mean?

  • This is good, Kellie – you’re helping me see this from an angle I hadn’t before.
    What I’m getting from your comment is that the focus belongs on US, not the other. Or ANYTHING outside us.
    Ha!! I wish I’d have said that!!

  • Lovely Me says:

    I have a little story relevant to this. I also LOVE having this discussion! It’s a hot topic in many LOA communities, and I must admit it’s a bit of a controversial one. some people believe in it 100%, others feel it’s controlling someone else, which is something you simply cannot do, etc.
    I have been over and over this question, and in fact, it’s the very thing that brought me to The Secret, which lead to Abraham Hicks and my search for answers.
    This will be a long post, so settle in!
    For many years (since the tender age of 18), I was in love with a man. Our relationship was short, but my love was there, even when he wasn’t. We were apart for 3 years and I thought of him every day and loved him. He did come back, but it did not last. I was devastated, once again, by the man who held my heart for 4 years.
    Just a little bit before our last breakup, I was given a copy of The Secret. I watched it, and that was the beginning.
    I decided to make a list of everything I wanted in my Perfect Mate. I believed in this list so much that I wrote it with the intention of attracting my ex. I detailed my list to fit him exactly. I recall even writing “His name should be [ex’s full name], and his birthday is [ex’s birthdate].” I went on about how many children, marital status…I detailed it all to fit my ex.
    I didn’t need the list.
    Before my ex and I had even broken up, my life was changing and there came to be many new faces in my life. I did not take special notice of anyone since I was wrapped up in my at the time boyfriend.
    To fast forward a bit, within 5 months, I took more notice of one of the new people in my life. I recall one day in December it hit me…this man was my walking list with slight variations. He had the same first name as my ex and last initial, even the same birth month!, number of children and marital status were the same, he is older than me, the body type fit, even down to the facial hair….and he was much more sophisticated than my ex. He was better than anything I could have imagined all at once. He was a taste of what’s been in my Vortex. We had an instant connection while I was with my ex, but I couldn’t “see” him clearly because my focus was elsewhere.
    LOA moved this man into my experience before I made my list. I was shooting off rockets of desire without realizing. I was not a deliberate creator, but LOA was still at work.
    This man and I are not romantically involved currently, but I know we have feelings for each other, which brings me along to what I’ve recently learned. An older idea from Abraham.
    Get off the subject.
    After realizing this man was brought into my experience via LOA, I sunk my teeth in an emotional and mental way. What was fun and magical turned into needing. “I neeeeeed this man now. I need a relationship with him RIGHT NOW! LOA brought him to me, so where’s my relationship?!”
    All relationships are vibrational. This man and I have a strange relationship and are constantly giving each other mixed signals…and I believe the reason is because I’ve been obsessing over the subject of relationships, and love, and this man, and since it all comes back to vibration…well, my vibration has been out of sync with this subject and this particular person.
    I can’t describe how magical it all was when I realized this man was my walking list, but instead of keeping it fun – since love is usually such a passionate and important need for many people – it stopped being fun and magical and it began to not feel good. I “pulled the plug on fun” without truly realizing it.
    Long story short, I think Mary’s/SelfHelpGoddess’ post (the very first one) hit the nail on the head entirely.
    The biggest thing I have learned through this all and my journey with LOA is to HAVE FUN WITH IT! Life is MEANT to be fun! When we stop having fun, our vibration is not…as vibrant, and in turn we don’t feel good when we’re not having fun. This is the new way of thinking – that life is supposed to be fun.
    Thanks to Jeanette for giving me a chance to share my story and reconnect me with the fun of it all. I adore your blog and your audience who participates as well. I also appreciate your other post for reminding me to have fun with it. That’s been the missing key.

  • Kellie Conley says:

    I was just thinking about this last week…I think it applies and would love to hear others thoughts! So, since whatever is showing up in our lives is just an indication of our past vibration then maybe the idea that there is any “perfect person” it totally just wrong.
    No matter who you choose or are in a relationship with, they are a direct reflection of your vibration, so if your vibration is appreciation and gratitude for self and other (Like Marielle) then you can’t be with someone who isn’t perfect.
    Not sure if I am describing this well.
    So the Universe (LOA) is always bringing to you an exact match for your energy. You could be with the absolutely perfect most amazing most stupendous person but if you are not running joyous energy that relationship won’t feel good, right?
    And conversely, even being with someone who is reflecting something you aren’t enjoying just tells you there is work you need to do on your own vibration, no?

  • Oh, “sunk my teeth in.” Beautiful way of describing that energy!
    Yeah, I know that routine, Lovely Me. I was just talking about this very topic with my Masters of Creation Circle members.
    Yep. Not conducive to getting what we want. lol
    Loved your example of getting a taste of what was in your vortex! I think that will inspire many creators here.
    Yay for lightening up and remembering to have fun with it all Thanks for reading, and especially for posting, Lovely Me.

  • M. says:

    Here is what Abraham say about this:

  • Parul Bhargava says:

    Awesome stuff, M!!! THANK YOU for sharing the link!! I’ve asked and asked and asked to know what Abraham has to say on this topic… and it’s been given!!! 😀 😀

  • “Shazam”!! lol
    This is great, M! I hadn’t heard this before. Fabulous material! (Stalking Fred video)
    Thanks for sharing it. 🙂
    (“Screw it, I’m gonna think of Fred.” rofl
    “He doesn’t know what a good idea I am.” MORE rofl!!)

  • M. says:

    🙂 you’re very welcome, dear Parul 🙂
    there is a ton of Abraham videos on youtube – I always like to go back to them directly and watch them (again if need be) because I tend to get confused after a while 😉

  • Parul Bhargava says:

    That’s what’s funny! I listen to Abe clips on youtube almost everyday too and have looked for clips on this topic many many times but to no avail… until now!!! 🙂
    Universe does have it’s own timing and way of delivering!!! 😀

  • sonia says:

    Great topic and my answer is YES, you can exactly get the one that you want even if there’s no guarantee that it will be you dream relationship, it’s up to your vibration! 🙂
    Nathaniel and Harmony, I absolutely love you!!! I love the energy of your comments :))))

  • helen says:

    great post as usual it is exactly what I was looking for, LOA is really uncanny knack of doing this lol! thanks all

  • Elizabeth says:

    Wow. Thank you for posting the Abraham “Fred” link. I’ve learnt so much from that. Isn’t it wonderful to detach from outcomes & be in the moment. I think there is so much wisdom in that link – I feel so grateful for the collective and what others are passing on. I don’t have to do it all myself & work it all out myself – I can listen & learn & float & attract wisdom & knowledge to myself.
    I love surrendering & letting go & relaxing. I also love meditating. Bliss.

  • M(onika) says:

    Dear all,
    I can second that last post … I love this Blog and I learn so much in here, by just reading and listening to your vibrational voices. I come here every day to read and enjoy 🙂

  • Ande says:

    As you know, Jeannette, I have a delightful personal experience that provides a resounding YES to this question. Remember my story about finding my husband, Tim? The key, I think, was finding the feelings I expected to have once I found Mr. Right. I got in that loved and adored place, and PRESTO, there he was. 🙂

  • Brian says:

    Yeah, you can use LOA to get someone. I got really, really close to my already taken object of desire. But at the same time I was telling the universe that I wanted someone who was right for me, not just beguiling. So I backed off and she is nowhere to be found. The vibration that had been putting us into very compromising conditions changed when I decided that it wasn’t right and although I didn’t immediately catch on to the fact that it was I who changed what I wanted the outcome to be (I still felt strongly about her) and I felt abandoned by her -complicated eh?- I eventually realized what was happening (I’m being patient waiting/conjuring someone best for me)and am ok with the situation. Sorry for the run on sentences. Brian

  • Ande, it’s great to hear from another one sharing her experience of having used LOA to get what she wanted, and Brian it’s great to hear from someone who is in process and playing with it!
    Feels like you’re doing a good job of making room for what you REALLY want. And I know the courage and trust that takes to make that space.
    Kudos. 🙂

  • Today’s daily quote from Abe pretty much hit the nail on the head for me!
    Keep remembering: there is not only one prize. And so, say to yourself things such as, “You appeal to me in all of these ways, and I am going to draw the essence of you to me. I will use my visualization of you to align my Energy, and then I will trust that Law of Attraction will bring me an exact replica of (the essence of) that which I believe you are.”

  • Ooh, very helpful, Mary! “I am using you to align my energy.”

  • Kellie Conley says:

    Self Help Goddess,
    I was just coming on to see if anyone had posted today’s quote! Such a perfect quote for this discussion, huh?!
    I also found this video yesterday that helped me really remember that it isn’t ever really about the “other” person…kind of what I was talking about in my other post earlier.

  • Oooh! This post just gets better and better! Thanks for that resource link, Kellie!
    My favorite part: when she says she wants someone who is truthful and worships and adores her, Abe says, “You’re looking for love in all the wrong places.”
    “What you REALLY want is alignment with your source, who loves and adores you. And you superimposed your source with someone who .. that’s not their job.”
    “NO ONE is that one. The one who loves and adores you is the source within you. Train yourself into that consistent understanding.”
    REALLY good stuff, Kellie (and Abraham)! Thanks for it!!

  • Elizabeth says:

    Kellie, Thank you for posting the video – I’m on a high learning curve here. I “accidently” came across this website & blog & I’m loving all that I’m hearing & learning here. How do you get into the vortex specifically?
    I meditate a lot & practice being in the now – is it the same thing?

  • Elizabeth, this post might be helpful about getting into the vortex:

  • Kellie,
    Thanks for the video link, and also for your comment above about how there really is no ‘perfect person.’ I’ve been thinking about that since yesterday, trying to wrap my head around it!
    I think you are right. Ultimately, there can never be a ‘right person’ or ‘wrong person’… because it always comes back to how we are flowing our energy!! If we think a person is ‘wrong’ for us, or not the perfect person, we just have to flow different energy! Then, maybe we will attract a different person to us, or maybe we will just elicit new qualities from our partner that we hadn’t really been focused on before.
    I am loving this thought, Kellie!!

  • Kellie Conley says:

    Glad you’ve found such a rich environment to learn! As far as how I specifically get in the vortex – I will use just about anything – lol! I have a daily meditation practice which definitely sets the stage, I watch Abraham videos frequently, I appreciate the beauty around me (I live near a beach and try to go there frequently just to marvel at the beauty)! It kind of depends, Jeannette has a bunch of great things I think she calls Vibe Lifters on Good Vibe University. I think they are open for anyone to see, meaning you don’t have to be a member. After a while you start to realize it is easier to get in the vortex than it is to stay out! That’s fun stuff. There is no rush, you will learn and integrate as you need to. You are obviously already on the path to awakening!
    Self Help Goddess – thanks so much! This is a topic you can probably tell I’ve been working with for a very long time! 😉
    Glad you connected with my perspective because sometimes I think it can get lost in all the seeking and striving for that glorious feeling of being in love! Doesn’t Abe say something like “you never get it done and you can never get it wrong…?”
    Thanks Jeannette for this chance to let the ideas flow!

  • Elizabeth says:

    Ah…thanks for your generous reply Kellie. I’ve been doing stuff in the vortex for years – I just didn’t know this specific terminology. There are so many Spiritual schools of thought & so many corelations between them all. A very awake & bright friend of mine told me that a long time ago & it’s true.
    I enjoy exploring so many areas & teachers but ultimately simplicity works for me. I teach/guide meditation, amongst other things, and I just LOVE it. I’m learning more & more to be responsible AND free to create. I went into the vortex before I went to sleep & awoke SO refreshed & inspired – I’ve been painting all morning & I’m feeling very well & very alive! (it’s midday here now).
    When are you coming to Australia for a holiday?!

  • Brian says:

    An aha moment that corresponds to the subject of this thread. Earlier I had written of my recent experiences with this one lady. So we backed off of bonding behavior pretty significantly and I supposed it was mostly adios, and for very sensible reasons.
    So I was into bettering myself physically/spiritually/mentally, playing with techniques and trying to get into alpha state as often as possible. To me thats fun.
    So I run into her, she’s got time to kill, we go have a couple of drinks (and no more-significant info).We actually just chat at such a more close level than the one we had before hormones came into play. It was perfect. and love was communicated without any emotional/mental hassle.
    So by relaxing and not trying to figure things out and just emitting vibrations from your best part of self —taking a breath— the universe will give you something, especially with someone you connect with, beyond what you could have thought up yourself.
    So my conclusion is that we shouldn’t pre-catagorize what kind of relationship we want to have with that person beyond being in the vortex together. You might get a mate, you might get the best friend you could ever conceive of having, or you might get entertained, or learn something. Quien sabe?
    If a loving relationship is what you really want it’ll happen in a way more beautiful than wishful thinking.It’ll be a gift from God and you’ll appreciate it.

  • Elizabeth says:

    Bellisimo Brian…x

  • Wow! Way to be open, Brian!! I like that: “we shouldn’t pre-catagorize what kind of relationship we want to have with that person beyond being in the vortex together.”

  • Nathaniel says:

    When you’re in the Vortex:
    You expect good things to happen to you.
    You expect the guy you like likes you back.
    You get that guy.
    You get that guy to propose to you.
    You get married.
    You get a house together.
    You have kids together.
    You grow old together.

  • MissyB says:

    Nathaniel – you’re fab !
    I’m off to the vortex, for not only do I want the guy to like me back, I want him to love me back !
    Something Harmony said…the no list way of attracting THE one. One of the first LOA books I read described how the author kept on getting the bloke that the list requested…and then found out she wanted something more…so she had to refine again. She had no shortage of men…but none of them were THE one. So she simply requested that the Universe sent the right one for her…and hey presto…the right one for her came along. I’ve never been one for lists in men…hell yes there are a few things I wouldn’t mind…but if he loved me like I loved him, would it matter if he couldn’t ride a motorbike when I can ?

  • Elizabeth says:

    Amazing Generous Jeanette! Thank you for that suggestion to look at the quick ticket link…I just love the simplicity of it all…I’m having such a great time in the vortex & so excited & passionate about life, my life & creating creating creating!
    I love this…”Abraham has said before that if you choose “peace” over “joy” it simply means you’re tired and it’s time for a break. Once you give yourself that break, joy will more easily find you.”
    I also love the ABC game that Debra suggested. Thank you Debra! I’m having SO much fun playing that game & getting so highly energetic & wildly excited that I have to remember that G is for grounded & F is for focused!
    It is astounding how much my life has transformed in the last few days by playing & living consciously in the vortex! I’m so buzzed & grateful for everyone’s posts! I’m watching lots of Abraham videos – we are all so blessed to be receiving so much from “them”.
    Love & Light to all…x

  • Mitch says:

    This has already been said here, but I’m echoing it now.
    I see nothing wrong with using LOA to manifest a specific person. If imagining that person gets you into a place of feeling great, awesome! And if that person happens to fall in love with you because of it, awesome!
    The fact is, the universe won’t “force” anyone to do something they don’t want to do. So if that person is inspired to love you because of your rockin’ vibe, you can rest assured that it’s for their highest good as well as yours.
    And if it’s not for their highest good, then your high vibe will bring you someone who *does* match what you’re sending out. Everybody wins!

  • Bella says:

    Wow, this thread is so rich in information and tools I am reading everything v-e-r-y slowly to digest all of them! Thanks for posting.

  • Nathaniel says:

    AWARENESS- of your emotions. You have to feel good while thinking about that guy (let’s call him Matt). You’re probably thinking about Matt a lot so are you either focused on the fact you don’t have him or are you focused on how cool it would be to be with him. Getting attached, obsessed or needy happens in small moments first then builds to more and more moments . If you are aware of those moments then you have choices. You have the choice to focus on what you want or what you don’t want.
    MEDITATION- is the technique to use to have more awareness. More awareness-more choices. Meditation is like lifting weights- so you get strong at concentration, focusing, awareness–so it will be easier to feel good when you think about Matt.
    ENJOY-the journey of pursuing Matt. Going after Matt is an idea. And idea that you got in the Vortex-that is where all ideas come from. And follow ideas for the pleasure of the journey. The fruition of the idea is not the only source of pleasure. YOu can enjoy the first germ of the idea-when you thought-hey I like Matt. Then when you thought I think Mattand I would be good together. Enjoy every step from the first time you talk to him to asking him out to getting ready for the first date-to having your first kiss. Enjoy the entire process. Whether you enjoy these steps ornot depends on what you are thinking about right before them. Prepave the steps. Set the intention before you call him on the phone. . Act as if you are farther along in the relationship. That will maek it more fun. IF you act like you have already been dating for a hwile and slept togther many times. How do you ask someone out at that ppoijnt in the relationship? With expectation that they are going to say yes? Also don the attitude that you have the power. You are like a casting director. It was your brilliant idea to bring Matt in for an audition. You went on your intituion that Matt would be good for the role. You get to decide whether he is a good fit for you or not. To make it even more fun–focus on the reasons why he is a good fit-why he is a brilliant idea.
    And the #1 tip–THE STAKES HAVE TO BE LOW.
    I think about romantic ocmedies-where the stakes are always high. Get this guy now or die. Julia Roberts in My Best Friend’s Wedding is trying really hard to get the guy in a weekend before he gets married and if she doesn’t then she’s screwed. She has decided that he is the only guy for her and she is 30 now. She doesn’t believe there are other options. She is very attached, obsessed, and needy about this guy. And it doesn’t work out for her.
    YOu have to believe that there are plenty of options. And plenty of people that could be your soulmate. There is an abundance of good guys out there. The problem is not believing this. So you try really hard to get one guy and hold on to him for dear life because it is a big deal. If you believe there is only one guy for you and its Matt–then you will be obsessed over him. Matt is just one of many possibilites. The other problem is it can’t be that big of deal to be in a relationship. You are not looking for the one to make you happy or complete you. The happier you are–the lower the stakes. The lonlier you are-the higher the stakes. So marry yourself first. IF you love your life, you self, your job, and are having the time of your life–then it doesn’t affect things if Matt is in your life or not. it owuld be cool to share your life with Matt but you don’t need Matt to make you hjappy. You already are happy. ANd it is more than just loving yourl ife-it is loving yourself single. If you are comfortable going out by yourself, eating dinner in a restaurant alone, then the stakes are lower when you meet Matt. You have nothing to lose. So marry yourself first. Be determined to find out how you can enjoy yourself, feel like you are in a relationship already with yourself, sharing your successes and wins with yourself. This is a huge leap for people I know. But I believe in you. There have been people sitting in your shoes and they learned to marry themselves and then they got the guy. It happened to my wife. So it can happen to you.

  • Elizabeth says:

    Nathanial – you are so beautiful – thank you for this post. I’ve been consciously in the vortex for over a week, have joined a spiritual/green dating website, found someone awesome & went for a 2 hour coffee date today. So my vibration has increased enormously since I’ve well…raised it in the vortex & I’m manifesting & creating fast! I’ve manifested a highly intelligent, conscious, hot man who has now asked me for another date.
    I really needed to hear your latest post so I’m most grateful for your contribution & the timing of same…the Lovely Universe has superb timing as always.
    Love & Light to all…x

  • Lovely Me says:

    Nathaniel, I think I attracted your post! My above story, my ex was called Matt, and so is this other guy that I feel LOA brought to me. Due to this post and the wonderful comments, I’ve been reaching for a new level of understanding and feeling and trying to ditch the neediness and enjoy the ride.
    I am actually a person that enjoys solitude and I like being single, but when I fall for a guy, it feels like exactly that – that I’ve fallen into a sea of emotions, and sometimes it’s hard for me to ride the waves and enjoy it rather than feel like I’m constantly getting head-dunked.
    Your post really brought me a lot of clarification. I know I attracted your solution by my question – Law of Attraction in Action for sure:)

  • Max says:

    Thanks for a redirection as I see I’ve been missing out!
    Now to this dog chasing thing, I have a pack of animals chasing me. What do I do now?

  • Max, you’re a hoot!!! rofl

  • Max says:

    Well, when you do it right and it works aren’t we to have fun? Getting uptight with this stuff kinda gets to serious and then it does not work. I think experimenting with it and looking at new avenues makes for new discoveries and an exciting life!

  • Elizabeth says:

    Hey Max…so cool that you said that – getting uptight is serious & seriously not the way…thanks for the reminder!

  • Max says:

    All of the mystics apparently were not attached emotionally to things. Anyone having been divorced know how easy it is if there is no emotional attachment. Nothing bothers you even if the storm is raging.
    We easily handle things we stay focused on with that care free unattached persona. That is what attracts all those dogs that you want to follow you. Be in charge of yourself. Step out boldly with the gusto you feel in you. Boy will you attract everything you want ~~ but be also patient but know things are working. Now go enjoy your day.

  • Bella says:

    I found my answers from Abraham-Hicks. Here the website and I am listening to the audio. It’s free.
    Have fun co-creating and may all your wishes come true – NOW 😉

  • GOPALI GHOSH says:

    nathaniel, I am glad I read your post because i know now I am not crazy- yes about him but not losing my marbles. I do what you have said all the time, i create scenarios and situations as though they are in the now and I share them with him and he loves them too. But its a LDR; I just need to keep on visualising wrting the reality and it will happen…

  • Celtic Flower says:

    Life is amazing, I’ve been reading the blogs, I cant remember how I got to this site….After reading and reading all the feedbacks on this site, I can see myself, this has opened my eyes. I have also been to some of the hyperlinks, and have had a belly laugh, thinking,many think on the same lines of thought as myself. I too would like to attract a life partner, and no more…..samples….What I can say, I have learnt is LET GO….have more fun, dont take it so seriously. I have been known as a shining star…………Me thinking, wow in new relationship, only to find out, that I am a guiding light, to help someone else on their life journey….Maybe I need to tweek my shining light….

  • Jeannette says:

    I’ve got a feeling this is ALWAYS good advice, no matter what, Celtic Flower (when you shared):
    “Have more fun; don’t take it so seriously.”

  • Drewby says:

    When I create a relationship I do just that. I imagine what type of relationship I’d like to have. I picture what we’d talk about and do together. I imagine how I feel about the woman I’m attracting into my life and let her show up.
    I recently spent months pursuing someone and “creating” a relationship with her. When I shared the Law of Attraction with her, she turned around and used it to create a relationship with a guy she’d been interested in for a while. It renewed her hope in the situation and in the whole process I realized I had been trying to squeeze her into the model of the relationship I was creating.
    I’m not the greatest judge of what will truly uplift me. I just seek to be uplifted and trust that the right things will come and make it happen. I’m creating that the woman of my dreams feels the same for me when our friendship develops into something serious. And now I’m take action. I ask women out regularly and trust that the right relationship will develop naturally and with joy, not frustration.

  • LovelyMe says:

    Dear Jeannette (and everyone else!),
    On GVU I talked about using LOA to get a specific person, and I’ve gotten wonderful feedback – mainly to NOT be specific.
    My question/discussion is this:
    When I start letting go of the need, I end up rendezvousing with many synchronicities with the *specific person*. What is going on here? Does this prove that you can use LOA to get the *specific guy*, as long as you are truly lined up with it?
    Just wanting further understanding of why these things happen.
    Very interested to hear everyone’s thoughts! Hoping that Mary will respond to this as well:)

  • Jeannette says:

    LovelyMe, I forwarded a note to Mary Knebel (Self Help Goddess) to see if she’d pop back in on this one …
    … but in the meantime, my thoughts are that it proves the power of releasing the need. As soon as need is gone, alignment is stronger, and Universe uses the path of least resistance to deliver what we want.

  • LovelyMe says:

    Hey Jeannette, thank you so much!
    Yes, I agree dropping the need is a big key to it all.

  • Max says:

    Sounds like someone found my stash of smart pills! It’s what is in your heart, not in your head.

  • […] you feeling like Kelly? Do you have relationship questions like “Can I attract a specific person?” or “How do I get him to love […]

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