Unleash Your Inner Diva

Release Your Inner DivaEvery week I talk with folks wanting to know how to get the goods – whether it’s a lucrative business, a better love life, a lifestyle upgrade, or whatever.

Often I find the person I’m talking with doesn’t really know how to be good to themselves.

Meaning they’re gifted at putting others’ needs first: prioritizing what the kids want, what the boss needs, doing the favor for the friend, etc.

But they’re last on their own list of who gets attention.

Follow that through on a law of attraction basis … if Universe can only match what you’re flowing, how can it be good to you when you don’t do that for yourself?

Not so well, it turns out.

I’ve said before that the Universe can only be as good to you as you are to yourself.

So if you want the world to bring you good things, you need to be able to do that for yourself, too.

Which is why I’m such a big fan of practicing self-love to grease the manifesting wheels.

For those who have habits of denying ourselves life’s pleasures, or who find it uncomfortable to let others be good to us, there’s an inside remedy for that …

… unleash your Inner Diva.

(Or for the guys, Inner Divo.)

When you let your Inner Diva lead the way, you’ll learn:

  • how to expect the best and get it
  • how to let yourself have what you want
  • how to say no when that’s what’s best (for you)

… and all sorts of other great skills you may not have yet mastered yet.

Your Inner Diva knows.

I asked a fellow goddess her thoughts on what it means to embrace this energy. Here’s what Jacqui said:

A diva will amplify her strengths, and delegate her weaknesses while she masters what matters to her OWN big picture.

I like that. For those of us who may have negative connotations associated with the word diva, let’s create a new model of what this energy can do for us. Here’s a manifesto to help access your Inner Diva:

Diva Manifesto

A diva knows what she wants.
A diva takes her time.
A diva expects the very best.
A diva doesn’t explain herself.
A diva treats herself well.
A diva teaches other to do the same.
A diva doesn’t answer to anyone.
A diva accepts all compliments.
A diva likes who she is.
A diva doesn’t suffer fools.
A diva asks for what she wants.
A diva exudes confidence, commands respect, and stands up for herself.
A diva knows she’s worth it.

For those who are trained to be nice, play small, stay humble and take care of others first, letting your Inner Diva out to play creates a vibe that allows your desires to manifest once and for all.

What does your Inner Diva know that you don’t? Give her the reins and show Universe you really do know how to let life be good to you.

  • February 25, 2014
  • Daniel —
    I think this is a great question! I think it’s always a good idea to bring cultural assumptions out and lay them on the table.
    My take on it is simple.
    Go through the list above and the beautiful comments left by other luminaries and find the ideas and concepts that feel empowering to you and leave the rest.
    To me, the ability to do that one thing will unleash the inner divo faster than anything else.
    In other words: know thyself.
    P.S. Serious props for knowing the correct genere: divo!

  • Shari says:

    I’m not a guy, obviously, but I don’t necessarily relate to ALL of what’s listed for connecting with your inner diva myself (as displayed in my comment/question above) because for me there are different “challenges” to my good self care than for others, even within my gender. But to me, that’s what a lot of it refers to is our triggers for not getting needs met. All of the men I know well have these too, some similar, some more specific to their family and/or to being gender role specific that cause them to not treat themselves as the absolute gift that they are as a top priority. …just my two-cents. 😀

  • As I was thinking about your question, Daniel, I realized a response might be more credible if it came from a guy.
    Let me ask Stephen, Robert, Frank, Namaste, Evan and friends to chime in …

  • Daniel says:

    So, how does a guy become a “divo” without coming off as a jerk. I know this is a very different problem for guys.

  • Crystal says:

    Yes! Yes! Yes!
    Thank you so much! I love your Diva list and am committing myself fully to becoming a Dive.
    Thank you!

  • Having been in theater for nearly 3 decades, being called a diva isn’t always couched in the most admiring of terms … but that’s usually when said diva is wielding her power like a petulant toddler.
    But when she is a TRUE diva … a woman in command of her talents, her environment, her life … then diva-power is a force for good, up-lifing all around her, inspiring and encouraging.
    As Marianne Williamson said, (and I live by this), “There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won’t feel insecure around you.”
    Do the world a great service, dahling … be a diva.

  • Cassie says:

    Jeannette I love this! What a very cool way to describe self-love! I also love your suggestions for living a new story about being a Diva. I would add to it by saying, everyone loves to be around a Diva. A Diva only has those around her who love what she creates in the world. Those that adore her and love being in the presence of what she creates (free meals is one you often get if you’re with me) is a very lucious experience. Those who can hang with a Diva rise to their own higher version of themselves (Jeannette mentioned this too). Being your own Diva creates space for others to expand. And some fall away. It’s not good or bad it just sometimes is. And it is ok. What I’ve learned is that sometimes when someone falls away it’s just to go discover their own Diva and then they come back 🙂 Imagine life where you traveled around with a bunch of Divas who were living in full Divahood! That is a very juicy life!
    Thanks again Jeannette! I love the visual I just created!

  • Gillian says:

    I love, love, love this Jeannette!!! You are just AMAZINGGGGGG <3

  • That feels like a healthy Diva, Janette! I love how easily you connected with her, too.
    I realized tonight I’m really good at treating my cats like divas, so I’m going to do as they do and insist on only the best food and cleanest litter boxes and most comfy of laps. lol ok, maybe not the last two, but still – the cats are good models of this!

  • Janette says:

    My Inner Diva knows that in order to bring the very best of herself and her magic to the world, she requires her needs to be met, easily and without question. She’s clear about those needs and doesn’t hesitate to let them be known, not out of ego but out of her conviction that this is how she does her best work.
    Keeping my Inner Diva happy, nourished and valued benefits the whole world.
    Wow – I didn’t see that coming. :-O
    Thank you for this post, Jeannette!!! It’s an eye-opener for me, since I can see lots of opportunity to close that gap between me and Diva Me. Ha!
    Yup. Payday. 😉

  • “I might even entertain a story about how me living big helps others see how it’s okay for them to do the same, so in that sense I’m actually performing a community service by living my Inner Diva.”
    Hahah!! Now THAT is the mark of a true diva!! =)

  • Deborah, you are SO ridiculously cool!!!
    Thanks for that brilliant contribution! 🙂

  • LOVE. THIS. 😉
    On days when this level of self-care doesn’t come easily, it helps me to hold a role model of this energy in my imagination. There are 4 women I know — or have known over the years — who are a true inspiration in this way.
    So for instance, on days when I’m feeling a bit self-conscious and perhaps hyper-aware of what others may be thinking of me, I tap into “Nerissa Energy” and imagine my friend’s truly awesome obliviousness to the perceptions and judgements of others, and her relaxed, easy way of navigating the demands of her day.
    Or when I need to stand up for myself in a client situation — which is a very specific type of interaction — I tap into “Hayley Energy” and just speak my truth and my needs very clearly and matter-of-factly, with no judgement or drama.
    So actually, if someone ever asked me “Who do you think you are?” I might have to pause and ponder. Who *AM* I right now? Could be anybody! Hahah!!

  • Such a good question, Shari! I expect we’ll hear lots of helpful input from other readers.
    I’ll start by suggesting someone in this boat would begin with an intention to be more comfortable being their true Self, despite how others received that. (A simple intention goes a long way!)
    Then I’d start imagining what it might look like for me to be completely comfortable in my true diva-ness next to others who didn’t feel as big. Getting the picture of it in my head (what it looks like when I’m living it out how I want it) can help me achieve it.
    I might even entertain a story about how me living big helps others see how it’s okay for them to do the same, so in that sense I’m actually performing a community service by living my Inner Diva.

  • Shari says:

    Please help me with an aspect of this concept… I am not unfamiliar with the diva manifesto and enjoy exercising it regularly. However, there is a spot that comes up every so often that I have a hard time navigating and that is when I’m in the presence of someone who feels diminished by my goodness. I seem to have a behavior pattern that will go to playing small so they don’t feel bad because of me. YES, I KNOW the reality is that they will play small because it’s their story not “because of me”, however this still plagues me and I’d LOVE TO LET IT GO once and for all! (As this is a form of an old behavior with my older sister that I’ve had also…)
    ANY SUGGESTIONS/INPUT is greatly appreciated!

  • I KNEW I would learn something powerful from your Diva, Sophie! haha
    Thanks for posting – AND for being such a good model of this in the world.

  • Sophie says:

    Bwahhahahaha! I am laughing because you totally read my mind! I have no problem asking for what I want and getting it!
    And at the same time, I am happy to receive it the way the universe delivers it without me deciding exactly what it’s going to look like!
    My inner Diva may be a demanding b**ch but she knows it never looks like what you think it’s going to look like!

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