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Surrendering vs. Creating

Some of us in LOA world wonder how (or even whether) the spiritual teachings of surrendering work with conscious creation.

Manifestors know we can create our reality by focusing on what we prefer.

Yet there is much spiritual wisdom about accepting reality without resistance and surrendering to God’s will.

How does that fit in with conscious creation?

Anyone who has studied Byron Katie’s Work, or been inspired by Michael Singer’s Surrender Experiment, may have questioned how those habits work for conscious creators.

Can just saying yes to life go hand in hand with manifesting what we prefer?

Remember my massage therapist who just let herself “fall into it” when she got fired and had no money to pay rent? She had no resistance to what was happening.

It was a huge lesson to me on the power of allowing.

So I know that letting go is an integral part of a manifestor’s skill set.

Yet when Amina Makhdoom invited facebook friends to a month-long practice of saying yes to whatever life presents (replicating Singer’s surrender experiment), I immediately thought of my ex’s booty call invitation. And the boss who recently suggested I return to the fold in corporate world.

Neither of which I had any interest in. To say the least.

Was she asking that I surrender and say yes to the things I have absolutely no personal preference for? Because that’s not my idea of a good time.

Ruby GangadharanWhich is why I asked Ruby Gangadharan her thoughts. (Ruby is a student to the yoga sutras, a life coach, deliberate creator, and ashtanga yoga practitioner.)

Here’s what Guru Ruby had to say …

Deliberate creation is the process of using the universal law of ‘like attracts like’ to willfully call into your reality things you desire.

Surrendering is the process by which you release any active part in creating your reality and let the universal forces play out what they know is best for you.

At first glance, these might seem like they are in stark opposition to each other.

One is active and offers control while the other does not. They are in fact, different sides to the same coin.

Surrendering requires you to trust in a higher power. The premise is that the higher power knows what’s best for you and will provide you with opportunities and resources to help you live out your destiny.

Looks like you are giving up the control isn’t it?

But let’s question what this higher power is …

Deliberate creators reference ‘the source.’ We say we are the extension of that source energy. It is infinite; it guides us and creates a reality that is a vibrational match to us. Doesn’t this sound familiar to the higher power referenced in surrendering?

But how can you create the reality that you want when you ask me to surrender and say yes to all that comes my way?

You can because even when you surrender it’s your higher self that is sending opportunities your way.

Your higher self is still a point of attraction that knows what it desires and what’s its purpose is.

In Law of Attraction you are told of concepts such as ‘universal manager’ and the techniques of letting go, releasing resistance, and following the downstream flow. These are all techniques that draw from the core concept of surrender.

Surrender does not mean you go out to seek your next action. This is not about you finding the next thing to do. It is also not about saying yes to everything in the hopes that it will bear fruit.

Surrendering is about you keeping yourself aligned in a mental state of peace and being present to the Now.

And if a situation shows up that requires your attention, you do your part without attachment to the outcome, without either liking or disliking it for what it is and without losing your alignment and peace of mind.

This next thing is the important part that goes with the practice of surrender …

When you start the practice of surrender, you should engage in some regular practice of energy alignment or energy purification. (Michael Singer used regular meditation to maintain a steady state of mind). This is one example; you can choose an energy alignment practice that brings you to a steady state of mind (i.e. being in the vortex).

You have to find a practice which brings you into alignment with the source, brings you clarity and lifts your energy.

So if you find that by surrendering, situations show up that you don’t want or you aren’t sure how they will help; look at them as an indication of the vibrations that are active within you.

That will guide you in your alignment practice; either to release resistance or to realign or to seek more clarity.

To conclude, surrender is not different from the deliberate creation process. It is, in a lot of ways, its duality. Surrender is a philosophy (concept) and like every other concept out there, it can be used to best serve our growth.

This next bit is a Q&A exchange Ruby and I had via email.

I’m including it here (with permission) to help flesh out this subject …

Jeannette: So Ruby, are you saying that if I had a stronger alignment practice or purer energy, I wouldn’t be propositioned by my ex or invited back to a corporate job?

Ruby: There is a reason why proposition from the ex and running into an old boss has come to pass. There are two ways to look at this; a) there is a resistant energy towards those scenarios which is playing out (namely, a strong ‘not wanting to’ towards a corporate job and sleeping with an ex). What we resist persists.

Meditation (or whatever is your tool to release resistance) will help you emotionally detach from the outcome of these specific scenarios. Until you hold such a strong NO preference to sleeping with an ex, please expect ‘booty calls.’ 🙂

Does this help move you to the next level and explain surrender?

Jeannette: I think I have a different definition of surrender. Mine is more like … I can accept that life is presenting these things. I’m not resisting the presentation of them. (I get it’s in response to my vibration.)

But I can still honor my personal desires without feeling like I’m not ‘surrendering’ to life by doing so. To do anything else feels directionless and dishonoring of who I am.

Ruby: Surrender is really the next level to LOA’s releasing resistance. Things will continue to happen to us while we realign, release resistance. The practice of surrender comes handy while we move on with our life as our new vibrations take hold. Taking action without attachment to the outcome.

Explain that last statement, ‘… honor my personal desires without feeling like I’m not ‘surrendering’ to life by doing so.’ Do you think surrender means to give up?

Jeannette: saying yes to an invitation I don’t prefer (that would actually be in direct opposition to what I’m consciously creating) does feel like giving up my personal desire and my manifesting rights (let alone skills).

If something already is (in my reality) I know resisting it is insane. But sex with an ex or working a job I don’t want aren’t my present reality. The invitations are, but every part of my inner being says “not that way.” My inner being says run your own show! (Working for myself is elation! I love it!) And it also says, don’t sleep with that guy any more. There’s no elation in that proposition.

If the conscious creator way is to head in the direction of what feels better, then I am definitely not headed for corporate work or booty calls. Right? I’d be crazy not to listen to that inner guidance.

Ruby: Surrender doesn’t mean going against your core values, beliefs or purpose. It’s more about practicing detachment from the outcomes of our actions.

Seems to me you are on the right track of finding your own practice of surrender with or without you agreeing to the ‘definition.’

This Q&A with Ruby will likely continue in the comments, where you’re invited to join in.

Thanks in advance for your input on what can seem like a challenging marriage of concepts – for some of us. 🙂

  • June 4, 2016

Help with Letting Go

prayer of releaseLast month Namaste Faustino shared this prayer in the comments of another post.
While he used this to release an obsession with a foiled love interest, we could use it any time we need help letting go attachment to a person or thing.
(Including a prospective employer or job, a potential investor or funding source, a baby adoption, a tenant or property, etc.)
Here is Namaste’s story, followed by the prayer:

A long time ago I met a woman named Kelli. She was amazing; we clicked but the next step never happened.
Problem was I couldn’t stop thinking about her. This had never happened to me before so I was at a loss about what to do.
This went on for a really long time and it drove me nuts.
Finally the mother of a friend of mine heard about what I was going through and came to the rescue.
She said, “You need to use the Prayer of Release. All you have to do is say it out loud one time. If this woman is meant to be in your life, you’ll continue to think about her. If she’s not, the desire to think about her will drop away.”
I was willing to try anything so I did.
To my total and complete surprise it worked! I stopped thinking about Kelli and that was that.
I’ve given this prayer to others and seen equally positive results. If I ever have another client who is convinced s/he is meant to be with someone, the prayer is the first place I’d start …

And now for the letting go prayer itself:


I accept all people, places and things that are a part of my path.

I ask that all people, places, and things that are a part of my path come to me.

I release all people, places and things that are not a part of my path.

I ask that all people, places and things that are not a part of my path release me.

I hope this prayer helps bring you peace and allowing next time you’re holding on too tightly. It’s already worked for me!

  • March 10, 2015

How to Release Attachment

how to release attachmentAs many a conscious creator has experienced, the feelings of need and attachment can kink a lot of manifesting parties.

The more we want something, and the more our happiness depends on getting it, the more we push it away.

Seems like a rather cruel system when you think about it. The stronger the desire, the longer it takes to get here? How rude.

But that’s only when we’re attached to the results. That is, when we need this outcome in order to feel happy or satisfied.

It is possible, believe it or not, to have a strong desire for something without needing it.

And when we hit that energetic combination, that’s the manifesting sweet spot.

It’s one reason why we’re so good at manifesting the “little” stuff we don’t care too much about, and why the “big” things are so long in coming.

Because we’re fine either way with the “little” things, right? It’s no big deal if it happens or not. The things we really really really want, though – that can be a different story.

When our entire happiness is dependent on whether this desire comes to fruition or not – that is not vibrational alignment. That’s like vibrational limbo. It’ll slow your manifesting to a crawl! In fact, you may as well rely on action to make it happen when you’re flowing that kind of energy.

So, strong desire can be a good thing. There’s nothing wrong with really really wanting something.

Remember that strong desire and strong belief are the two keys to successful manifesting.

But don’t let that desire squash your good vibes now.

When you can really really want something, and

  • still know that you’re okay whether it happens or not, and
  • enjoy life now in lots of other ways, and
  • trust that if this good thing doesn’t happen something else fabulous will …

… that’s when you’ll see success.

The remedy is to be able to let go of attachment to results, to release need for this particular outcome, while still flowing a healthy desire.

Abraham has described this as a “loving what’s here and looking forward to what’s next” kind of perspective. That vibrational stance allows you to benefit from strong desire without kinking the manifesting party.

Here’s a compilation of  articles on the subject, designed to support your alignment by releasing attachment:

The Antidote To Attachment (sure fire way to release it)
How to Let Go (the good vibe community weighs in)
Want it Good or Want it Bad? (clean desire vs. dirty desire)
Letting Go of Attachment (from Zen Habits, read P through T)
How to Allow It without Giving Up (more wisdom from you guys)
LOA Success Secret #4 (don’t make it important)
How to Allow when the Pressure’s On (my “fine either way” story with a sick kitty)
How to Drop Need (four tips to release need)

My quick take on how to resolve this vibe-kinker:

  1. appreciate lots of other things in life
  2. enjoy whatever I can here now
  3. trust that Universe knows how to delight me in a wide variety of ways, so I can loosen up about how that happens
  4. I sing Bobby Pinson’s “fine either way” chorus to myself, to remember that no matter what happens, it’s all good. I’m just fine no matter what.

This is a concept worth mastering as a conscious creator, since it makes a big difference in our alignment.

If you’ve got tips to share, please do, since this is a subject that many a creator grapples with. Thanks in advance!

  • November 30, 2013

Q&A: Work It or Let It Go?

work it or let it go?We’ve all had the experience of manifesting things instantly without effort … like when we think about a specific someone and then get an email from them two seconds later.
Or a friend mentions a scene from an old movie, and that night we find the movie playing on tv.
Those experiences may lead us to believe our best manifesting process is a “hands off” one.
But what about all the suggestions we get for engaging regular processes like affirmations, visualizations, acting as if, etc.?
Does our best manifesting happen with conscious effort or when we just let it go?
That’s the subject raised at GVU this week, which I liked so much I wanted to offer for more input.  Here’s the question:

I never quite know what to do for the best – especially with the ‘larger’ things. For example, I’ve read that if you don’t put lots of energy towards your goal (i.e. techniques) then you’ll be waiting a long time for your manifestation to show.
Then there’s the more relaxed approach where you perhaps ‘make your request’ to the universe once and then let it go.  Any thoughts on this??

I’ve written earlier about how much effort is called for and will share new thoughts in the comments, but I’d love to hear from you, too, since my mind isn’t fully made up on this one.
Thanks in advance for sharing!

  • August 30, 2013

Let Go & Manifest 100,000 Fold More

When Michelle Dobbins told me this story, I begged her to share it with others.  It is the perfect reminder about how the “light touch” works extremely well in manifesting what we want.
See what you can glean for your own manifesting skills from Michelle’s success story:

Let Go & Manifest More with Michelle Dobbins

Michelle Dobbins is at www.dailyalchemy.com

I’ve been doing this law of attraction gig for over twenty years and I’ve manifested lots of incredible occurrences, but I can still get stuck when I really want something.
This is not a story about that.
This is a story about what happens when you don’t give a flip.
I had recently been reading Pam Grout’s book, E-Squared: Nine Do-It-Yourself Energy Experiments That Prove Your Thoughts Create Your Reality, and had interviewed her on my blog.
I wanted to do all of the experiments in her book and be supportive of her. The second experiment asks you to intend to see sunset beige cars or butterflies.
I always have to do things my own way, so I decided to intend to see white feathers. I’d done this experiment in the past, after reading Richard Bach’s book Illusions, and I’d seen several white feathers in a few days. I figured it should be easy to repeat and I’d have a good story to share with my readers about Pam’s book.
Easy peasy.  I made my intention and promptly forgot about it.
It wasn’t a big deal to me.
I didn’t need to see a white feather, but I felt certain one would cross my path with no more effort on my part.
The next day my family and I drove to Columbia, South Carolina and had a great family day. We went to a park and enjoyed nature, did some geocaching, met a retired couple who volunteered at the park teaching about nature. On our drive home I was feeling blissful thinking about how perfect the day had been.
Traffic came to a sudden slow down and my husband grumbled that maybe there had been an accident.
My daughter said “I think someone must have hit a white bird.”
I looked and there were thousands of white feathers on the both sides of the interstate stuck to the grass. This continued for at least four miles. We were all giggling about the massive amounts of white feathers. I don’t know if a down truck lost its cargo, or what, but I’ve never seen so many white feathers anywhere before. Once we got to the end of the feathers, traffic picked back up again.
We arrived back home and I found one white feather lying on our welcome mat, confirming the answer to my intention. It was like the universe said, “Look, I can give you so much more than you are asking for. Just relax, have a good time and I’ll take care of the rest.”
The moral of my story is set your intention and then go have fun. The universe has your back.
If you can let go of the vibrations of worry and want, the universe can deliver a hundred thousand fold. Or more.
Michelle Dobbins is a pre-published author who shares tips, “spells” and true stories of magic, creation and love in everyday life on her blog at www.dailyalchemy.com. You can connect with her and get her Magic Question of the Day on  Facebook and Twitter.

  • April 15, 2013