For those looking to let go of beliefs that don’t serve us, Abraham has a quick way to shift things.
While some people love working with EFT to help unhook from limiting beliefs, or using Psych-K, or Byron Katie’s Work, etc., some folks are still looking for an effective way to release thought-obstacles that keep us from success.
This suggestion may be your ticket …
Abe says that most people who taught us limiting beliefs (with rare exception) did it out of love.
Their intention was to support our success in life.
When we realize that truth and focus on the part where they wanted us to thrive, we’re free to choose new thoughts and beliefs that serve us better.
Here it is in Abe’s words:
Most people who are guiding you really mean well, so the way to shake those beliefs that no longer serve you:
Get to the bottom of the reason they tried to impart those thoughts to you to begin with, and accept the reason was that they wanted you to thrive – they wanted things to go well for you.
And then just fast forward to things going well for you and thank them for their part in it.
You don’t have to go back and unlearn those things – or stop believing those things – just believe so clearly (and practice so clearly) the thoughts that feel good to you now.
I, for one, sometimes wonder about seemingly contrary teachings in the LOA field about beliefs … Some say we don’t have to worry about re-writing limiting beliefs; others say we’ll be forever limited if we don’t address them.
Hearing this approach felt a bit like the best of both worlds. Meaning, it’s worth doing a little work if you notice you’re hung up in your progress, but it doesn’t have to be hard work.
So the way Abe tells it,
… just try on the thought that they were actually trying to help, from their own limited perspective. What was shared with you was actually shared from a place of love and support.
When you dial in on the idea that they were just doing their very best to help you succeed, Abe says that frees you up to focus on the part where you thrive. Find the thoughts that feel better and hang out there.
Sounds worth playing with. If you’ve got thoughts or experiences to share, we’d love to hear!
Today I spoke with someone who was torturing herself with a really nasty thought.
(Actually, I didn’t think it was that bad of a thought, but she said it was literally killing her.)
“Then why are you thinking it?” I asked.
“Because it’s true,” she answered.
Or at least, she suspected it was true, although she really wanted to believe it wasn’t, since it was a thought she couldn’t live with.
“Maybe you should think something else instead,” I suggested.
“How am I supposed to do that, when this is so awful?” she insisted.
Clearly she had no practice in finding thoughts that felt better. And she believed her thought was true.
Talk about the ultimate handicap – believing your thoughts and not knowing how to choose different ones. Sheesh!
She used my silence to repeat again just how horrible her thought/reality was.
Okay, I get it! But repeating it isn’t how we get out from under it!
“That’s one way of looking at it,” I offered.
And then I laid out like seven alternative thoughts, all of which felt way better, but she wasn’t biting. It’s not how she saw it.
Holy mother, I’m wondering, how did she get my number?! Not only that she can’t give herself relief from a horrible thought, but she can’t even pick one up when someone else (a really good professional even) is making one up for her! Wowza.
So she believes in the sh*t that sucks, and doesn’t know how to tear her eyes away from it.
Then I got an idea … “Hey, you know that inner guidance thing? How it doesn’t join us in untrue thoughts? And how it feels really bad when that part of us vacates the premises?”
No, she didn’t know that.
“Well, that’s how it works,” I assured her. “Which means any thought that doesn’t feel good isn’t true.”
“Absolutely not,” I vehemently insisted.
Her silence wasn’t from relief, but from disbelief. I suspect she joined me in wondering why she called me. Because clearly I was insane and of no use to her.
Don’t ask what made me think quantum physics would help the situation.
“Let’s look at it this way. Everything is happening, there’s no such thing as time, and you can experience any of those realities based on how you focus. Isn’t that reason enough to find a different thought?”
“What other thought would I think?” She sounded lost.
But I didn’t cave. “One of love! One of life! One of pleasure!”
Still the crickets. Okay, maybe I should tone it down … “It could be about mailmen or trees or anything!” (I was just naming random things outside the window.)
Still not helping, but she offered me one last chance to ease her tortured mind:
“What do you think about death?”
“Well, I don’t think about it that much.” (Duh, why would I?! I’m not into self-torment!) “But the truth is I don’t believe in it the way lots of others do. I believe there’s no end to who we are. Our bodies, sure. But who we really are – it’s indestructible and infinite. And super cool.”
I suggested she talk with her higher power – whatever that was – and ask for some support there.
She’s not religious, she contended. “Neither am I, and it still works.” (Go figure.)
I hung up feeling rather useless and also astonished at someone who practiced such incredible self torture by repeating the awful thought that didn’t feel good – just because it seems true. I wondered how horrid would it be to live like that.
And then realized, that was me, one week ago. When I cried for 12 hours straight after realizing my blind cat wasn’t home any more. I was under the spell of some heavy duty nasty thoughts, just like my friend was today.
I did try to find my way out, though:
It was a lot of anguish and misery. It was quite horrible – not just for me, but for everyone around me.
And I couldn’t stop. Until I fell asleep.
Which is when I dreamed of being reunited with my favorite cat.
Sure enough, at 4 am when I didn’t have a single negative conscious thought flowing – that cat came back.
So I get it. Sometimes we get stuck on a really awful thought that seems like we can’t shake.
But, we can. Eventually we’ll cry ourselves into exhaustion, or fall asleep, or realize we were seeing it wrong all along.
Some how some way we’ll get a respite from the torment of repeating the thoughts that don’t feel good. And when we do, we’ll remember how this works.
At least, that’s my intention for the next time I lose my head.
If you’re the unlucky person who is stuck sitting next to me as I empty the kleenex box, you have my permission to remind me of this post. So I can remember how ridiculous it is to keep thinking a thought that feels horrible.
I’ll remember that as I find my way to relief, some way some how, even if it’s crying myself to sleep, I’ll remember that when I give up the battle of the bad thoughts, I create an opening for something good.
And if my cat hadn’t returned, I’d eventually find my way to other thoughts. Because I’m cool like that. I know good times follow bad, that things get better, that I’ll have more friends, that everyone’s fine no matter how it looks like to the contrary in my limited 3D perception, and that I’m not dependent on anyone or anything for how I feel.
This post is designed to remind myself (and anyone else who might benefit from it) the next time we’ve fallen under the spell of a torturous “truth.”
That oughta do. 🙂
But if you’ve got words of wisdom to share with someone who is doing the mental flagellation game, please post them here. Many thanks!
Just because these fabulous thoughts are free doesn’t mean they’re not the most valuable thing you’ll ever bring home.
Good Thoughts are crazy powerful because they turn into things. Which is why it’s so magical to find the right thought for whatever you’re creating.
To get extra mojo for making your next dream come true, pick out an empowered affirmation from the Good Thought collection here. Then read below for further instructions …
We’re still adding to our Good Thought collection, but you might find the best one is the one you make up yourself. Create your own Good Thought and let it work wonders in your world.
Once you’ve got your empowered thought, work it!
That means think it! Read it! Speak it! Feel it!
Bring it to life daily, regularly, especially when you find yourself with a contrary thought. (You can use that as a trigger to re-engage your Good Thought.)
Universe has to make true any thought you dare repeat regularly. Don’t be surprised when you find yourself inspired to new actions after activating your Good Thought.
One way or another, magic will unfold and life will change when you put your Good Thought to work!
(And feel free to share your own good thoughts in the comments below …)
A brilliant client shared her list of “general truths” which I found to be extremely vibe-enhancing.
I wasn’t the only one. This list of better feeling thoughts (BFTs) was a big hit at GVU, too – so I thought you all might appreciate this resource as well.
Next time you’re looking for a way back to the neighborhood of your vortex, this general BFT list from my super smart co-creator in the UK might help:
It’s on its way.Now it’s getting even better.The process has begun.I can have whatever I want. I can have it any way I want to.It’s already ready for me.I just need to feel good/better. Right now.I decide what to feel – how to focus my attention.I can do it.I’m on my way.I am ready.All is well.I’m doing a good job – a really good job.I can just relax and appreciate my life.The work IS done – I’m just letting things come to me.I can get happy and appreciative about where I am.I AM happy where I am and eager for more.I can’t do it wrong.Nothing’s ever wrong.LOA works!It’s already in my vortex – it is real, it exists there.There’s so much to appreciate about my nowI’m getting better at this all the time.I can be all safe and calm.It’s natural for me to evolve.There are no mistakes.I am worthy.I am so loved.I can choose my thoughts and emotions, and change my world.I enjoy my life.I have already done the work.I can live with this.I can just relax.There are things about him/it that I can appreciate.I can accept him/it as he/it is.I don’t have to fight it.Things are a lot easier when I let go.The most important thing is that I feel good – right now.I’m eager for things to change, but not desperate.When I’m looking for what I wish to see, it appears before me.I can have fun no matter where I am, what I’m doing and whom I’m doing it with.I enjoy watching it unfold.I can manifest whatever I want – fast; simply by changing my vibration.I don’t have to account for where I’ve been – just focus on feeling good/better right now.I don’t have to fix the past.They don’t have to be different for me to love them. I can allow them to be as they are and pretend they’re different.There’s already a lot of support and love in my life.Everything comes to me easily.We’re all connected.It keeps getting better all the time.I keep meeting more and more wonderful people that I genuinely harmonize with.I’m so open to life and love that more people than ever before love me.I love life.It never stops; when one door closes, a 1000 new ones open up.I have everything already.I’m already everything that I want to be.I’m whole and happy within myself.I already have what I want to have.I know my way into the vortex.I am good at this.Life is good.
If you read through that whole list I am pretty sure you are feeling better already. You might even be in the middle of your vibrational sweet spot!
Big thanks to my inspiring fellow creator who let me share it with you. Feel free to add some of your own favorite BFTs (better feeling thoughts) in the comments!
Are you thinking about something you want to unfold?
If not, redirect. Because life follows your thoughts – and you can tell your future based on what you’re thinking now.
Here’s my recent experience with that:
The other night when my newest ex-boyfriend said to me, “Seriously? You couldn’t clean the sink out?” I felt psychic because I knew he was going to say that!
I had repotted four plants in the kitchen, made a bit of a mess of it with the dirt and such, and was anticipating his criticism. “Couldn’t you do that outside? You’re making such a mess!” is what I heard over and over in my head.
Which is why I made a point of cleaning it up spotless after I was done.
Even though it was perfectly clean, I still anticipated he’d find fault. Which of course he did. (He practically has to when I’m flowing that vibe!) I could hear him grumbling as he sprayed the sink and wiped it down again. “It’s never good enough for him,” I thought to myself.
A few hours later when I walked into the kitchen myself, I realized my mistake.
Well, several mistakes. The first one being that after repotting the plants, I took Sadie on a walk up the canyon and came home with very dusty sandals and feet.
Which I rinsed off in the kitchen sink. (That might sound gross, but I was already IN the kitchen when I realized I was leaving dust footprints across my ridiculously clean floor and didn’t want to walk any further – so I just popped each foot under the faucet.)
And forgot to clean it out after I was done.
So my ex wasn’t being an anal triple virgo when he complained about the state of the sink. It was a legit complaint.
Which I had tried to avoid earlier when I cleaned up the kitchen spotless.
But Universe has to bring our thoughts to physical fruition no matter what actions we do or don’t take to assist. (It’s not the action that matters – it’s the vibe!) And because I heard his imaginary words in my head so strongly about what a mess I made and how I didn’t clean it up right – of course that’s got to manifest.
I often say to clients: “Tell me your thoughts, and I’ll tell you your future.” (tweetable) Because as we think (consistently and persistently), so shall it be.
Which is why, several nights later when I declared to my ex, “I KNEW you were going to say that!” (he’d changed his mind about something he’d agreed to prior) – I realized I couldn’t blame him for it.
I have a very powerful mind.
And so do you.
Let’s use them for good, shall we? 🙂
Last post we explored the subconscious “problems” we believe in that keep us from getting what we want.
As in, believing that becoming wealthy is an issue because of the extra taxes incurred. Or that losing weight is a problem because of the uncomfortable attention garnered from the opposite sex. (Read the post again if this phenomenon doesn’t sound familiar.)
Now that we have brought those potential party poopers to light, what’s next?
Just bringing those contrary thoughts to the light of day can be enough to disappear them. (Yes, you can “disappear them.” They’ll evaporate in the light when you usher them out of the dark corners of your mind.)
But, some of the more stubborn stinkers may call for intervention.
If you’ve got a stubborn thought at cross-purposes of your dreams and desires, never fear. You’re still in charge. Here’s what to do:
1. Relax. This isn’t a big deal or a big mystery. Don’t let anxiety about a contrary thought add to negative energy. It’s not a big deal, especially when you’re observing it in action! You are SO in the power seat once you’re seeing clearly what’s happening, so it’s a great time to relax.
2. Get curious. We know what we resist persists, so we don’t want to engage a “war” against the thoughts that aren’t serving us. Observe them from a friendly, curious place. Just noticing what’s up, maybe even being entertained by it.
3. Check references. You know how before you hire a stranger off the street or accept a new tenant into your house you make a phone call or two to check them out? You can do the same thing with these limiting thoughts – inquire; question; test them out. Byron Katie’s work is a powerful process for this step.
4. Rethink it. Once you’ve poked and prodded and looked under the hood of the old contrary thought, it’s easier to find a new, more aligned, perspective. After you’ve tried on a few alternative thoughts, you’re bound to find one you like better. Entertaining that thought is going to serve you really well.
That’s how simple it is. Let’s look at an example:
My realization that somewhere deep down I believe once I’m loaded my sweetie will relate to me differently, as in a huge (read: threatening) shift of power in the relationship is actually kind of interesting. (That’s me getting curious, rather than judging myself for it or defending the truth of it. I’m just curious about it.)
How funny that I would think that! I wonder where that came from – in fact, maybe it’s time to check references. Is it true that my beau will be threatened when I’m the primary income earner; when his income is a pittance compared to mine? (That’s me putting the Work to work.)
You know, now that I think about it, I have to admit, he might be delighted with that situation. I can imagine he may very well have it in him to be a kept man. Now that thought I’m having some fun with. Is there another one I like better?
Maybe this one: I read recently that women who earn the money tend to think of it as “our” money whereas men not so much. So if that were the case, me making significantly more than my sweetheart might actually be a huge equilator. (I made that word up and I like it.)
That’s nice, but I like that other thought better – the one where Russ is excited to have a girlfriend whose income dwarfs his. Why not, huh?!
Just like that, I’ve begun to resolve my subconscious “problem” in being rich.
And, this isn’t the only way. Let’s hear from those of you who have alternative practices for unloading those thoughts that are preventing your total alignment to what you want.
Who will share?
PS – be sure to read comments for Kim’s excellent addition as step #5!
Much of the recent Abraham material focuses on reminding us to not get stuck in Step 1 energy.
You remember the steps, right?
Pretty cool system when you think about it. I mean, honestly, we’ve got the easy part! All we gotta do is live our life and let the good stuff come as we learn more and better about what we want.
And yet … not all of us experience it that way.
First off, we were trained to believe life works very different than that, so that didn’t help.
But even depsite knowing better now, many people find themselves slipping into vibrational patterns that keep them locked out of their party. (I call it “party;” Abe calls it “vibrational escrow” or the “vortex.”)
Yesterday I listened to Abraham refer to Step 1 as “Don’t Want” energy. That “don’t want” energy is from the contrast we bump into throughout daily life. It’s knowing we want friendly neighbors when they aren’t; safe travels when the road is hazardous; healthy & fit bodies when they’re sluggish or uncomfortable.
Anyway, it seems this is the part that many of us know to do – the ALLOWING of our desires to manifest in our physical reality – and yet we don’t always easily practice it. (Especially when we think it really counts!)
How can we shorten the distance between desire and the realization of that desire? How can we make sure WE’RE the ones benefiting from our experiences of contrast, not just future generations?
Lots of ways, some of which listed here will sound familiar if you’ve read my material for a while:
Abraham tells us to “bless them for what they birth in you” and then don’t look back (at the “don’t want) or you use them as your excuse not to get to your party. So you want to look forward – towards where you want to go, not where you are.
In the Seattle (July 2008) workshop, Abe also said the difference between fast & slow manifesting is that having a positive focus puts you in the vortex of your escrow (or puts you right smack in the middle of your party, as I would say). When you’re in vibrational range of what you want, your manifestations unfold much easier and swifter. That’s allowing.
In fact, we’re reminded by Abraham that we can’t think or act our way to success. All we have to do is just get happy and let the expansion come. When we’re doing hard work instead of getting happy, we are NOT in our vortex. Instead of trying to figure out how to get in there (which we do whenever we look over our shoulder at the “don’t want”), we can get happy by answering questions like:
I think that’s one reason why the pray rain journaling technique is so effective for so many – that it takes us to the heart of what we want and all the delicious details about it.
Regardless of how we get there, it helps when we stop thinking of all this as difficult or challenging, and just relax about it. It really is easier than we think, and when you reflect on all the ways you naturally DO allow, instead of thinking of all the times you’re not able to, you give yourself a big leg up.
As always, I’d love to hear your thoughts on the topic!