What To Do with a "WTH?"
Earlier this week a new client asked how to handle it when our intentions don’t come to pass.
Some people use the possibility of foiled intentions as an excuse for not practicing deliberate creation.
That’s not how we really want to play it, right?
Like, Tiger Woods doesn’t stop swinging because he might not make every shot and Mick Jagger doesn’t stop writing songs because one might not become a hit. There’s still plenty to enjoy!
We simply take our occasional disappointments in stride, shake ’em off, move on, and celebrate the successes that DO unfold. (And pretty soon we don’t even see them as “disappointments.”)
Which is what I got to practice when I learned a coaching award I intentionally set my sights on isn’t coming my way. My initial “WTH?!” response was quickly followed by wondering where I missed the mark.
After all, I wasn’t attached to the outcome (although my irritated dismay at the results would reveal otherwise), I didn’t overdo it with the manifesting, I acted as if and visualized occasionally, reminded myself of the reasons it could happen (amping up belief), and activated the vibration of acknowledgement (which is what I really wanted).
Which just brought me back to thinking, “What the h*ll?!”
Yesterday a former client sent a similar email after learning her desired manifestation didn’t come to pass either.
My suggestion to her is the same I gave myself and what I would say to anyone else in these circumstances:
1) If it didn’t happen it’s because we’re not lined up with it.
And that’s not a big deal. Let’s relax and remember life is still good (just look around to see evidence as to why that’s true).
After all, vibrational misalignment might not be a bad thing.
For example, in this case it turns out the award is going to someone who has a stronger focus on business than coaching (that’s not the case for me, so I don’t fit the profile of who they were looking for); and that the audience plays a part in choosing the winner. (I really don’t like popularity contests or soliciting votes.)
I’ve seen this with clients who were unsuccessful at manifesting a particular job or lover, only to later discover a person or opportunity that was even better for them than they originally set their sights on.
Expecting McDonald’s to deliver a gourmet meal isn’t exactly paving an easy path. Rather, we can just line up with “gourmet meal” and trust Universe to deliver it, not getting hung up on how or where or who it comes through.
Also, I recognized minor counter-intentions during the manifesting in realizing I didn’t want to deal with a winner’s spotlight. Do I need to get my hair done? Am I expected to promote this award as a recipient of it?
(Hm, starting to see why this didn’t come together for me.)
2) You’ve still got it banked; don’t give up on what you want.
If you imagined it, Universe put it together and it’s patiently waiting for you (in a vibrational state). It doesn’t disappear or go to waste – that energetic investment will be rewarded sooner or later. (Even if it’s when you croak, as Abe says, before you get lined up.)
“Acknowledgement” is what I thought that award would do for me, and when I recognize how I already experience that, as well as additional ways I could let more in, I realize there’s no such thing as “losing.”
PS – thanks to Paul and Kim for sending really nice acknowledgments my way this week. You reminded me I already have what I said I wanted!
Not to mention lots of us think it’s “over” before it really is.
My ex just called to say his credit card company refused him the additional credit he needed for an expensive truck repair he had scheduled at the shop today. He couldn’t see any other way the money would come to him in a few hours. (No time to find extra work, no work to be had even if he had the time, no one was in the mood to lend or give or pre-pay the money, etc.)
The smart guy recognized he was digging himself into a vibrational ditch with his fretting routine, so he said he wasn’t going to worry about it any more and hung up. Five minutes later he called back to say someone voluntarily out of the blue just gifted him more than he even needed for the repair within minutes of making the decision to stop worrying.
Amazing how shortsighted we can be sometimes, huh?
When I asked higher powers about it (just got a new oracle deck that I’m loving!) this is the message that came (my summary in parentheses):
- The fruits of your labor are manifesting. Behave as though the desired change has already come about. (You’ve planted a seed that is still unfolding.)
- The process has begun; things are not as they appear to be; let the desire take you further down the road. (It’s not over just because you can’t see it.)
- Normal methods and views are no longer applicable. New ways of seeing and operating are needed; move to a new vantage point.
Another tip came in from Alan Cohen’s email today, quoting A Course in Miracles:
“In any situation in which you perceive something missing, what is missing is what you have not given.”
Not exactly sure what that means yet, but what I’m most interested in exploring are YOUR perspectives on this topic.
How do you handle it when the intention (supposedly) doesn’t come to pass?