Yay, Contrast!

I don’t know about you, but this summer hasn’t been all happy happy joy joy.

I’ll spare you details, but it’s been unusually high contrast of late.

Technical definition of contrast:

The unwanted crappy side of life. It’s the stuff we don’t want and don’t like, ranging from things like a zit to a bankruptcy to a heartbreak to a life-threatening diagnosis.

(Mine’s probably like a 3 or 4 on the 10 point scale, so don’t feel too bad for me.)

Along the way I’ve gotten really friendly support from savvy creators on what to do about it:

  • “Look at the bright side. There’s plenty going right if you just look for it.”
  • “Universe is telling you something. Get the message and take action.”
  • “Chin up. Don’t let it get you down.”

All good tips!

There is plenty going right and it would be smart to receive any messages it contains.

And since conscious creators know we get what we vibrate, we sometimes have a tendency to want out of the crappy stuff pronto.

But here’s the thing …

Contrast is the fuel that feeds our expansion. (I learned that gem from Abraham.)

It’s what directly inspires new dreams and desires.

Life literally comes to a standstill without it. (Limbo, anyone?)

So it’s not necessarily a thing to be avoided or wished away.

And yet, that’s often our first wish when we see a loved one going through it. (Or ourselves, even!)

We want to see them find their way through as soon as possible. If we had the power, we’d wave it away with our magic wand.

But experiencing contrast doesn’t mean something’s gone wrong.

It doesn’t mean you’re failing as a conscious creator. It doesn’t mean you’re messing up your life.

In fact, it’s the exact opposite …

It means you’re alive and kicking. (Contrast is part of the gig!) You’re in the game! And you’re launching something fabulous – making it possible for life to get even better than before.

When you put it in that light, doesn’t it make you a little bit excited to have some?

Maybe when a fellow creator sees an LOA-savvy friend in the midst of the muck, the more appropriate response might be:

  • “Yeah, that sucks. Milk it, girlfriend!”
  • “You go, girl! Way to rock the party!”
  • “You get all the best problems!”

Okay, that last one made me laugh. And it’s true that this post is a lot easier to write with most of my big contrast in the rear view mirror.

But if we were being honest about how powerfully these unwanted parts of life can propel us toward new dreams and upgraded experiences, wouldn’t we welcome it and wish it on our best friends and family?

Wouldn’t we want to take them out to celebrate, instead of sending a prayer on their behalf?

(Not that someone in a big fat pile of crap is in the mood to celebrate, but you know.)

And yes, if a loved one is stuck in the struggle and forgot that they’re in charge of when they turn on the relief, it might be good to remind them how the system works and their role in it.

And certainly, it would not seem loving to say such a thing to someone who had no idea about their reality-creating powers.

But otherwise, instead of wishing someone else’s contrast away or trying to help them out of it, perhaps the most supportive thing to do is to let them have it and cheer them on from the sidelines.

Because contrast really and truly is where all the good stuff starts.

At least, that’s what I’ve been reminding myself this summer.

You can hear my favorite evidence of the power of contrast in the newest podcast: It’s My Contrast and I’ll Cry If I Want To.

Would love to hear your thoughts on the subject!

  • August 29, 2016
  • Anonymous says:

    So interesting. I’ve been going through an extremely intense grief process since my mom died this year (my dad died 3 years ago) and my grief counselor told me that she really just trusts the grief process. Its such a profound thing to say I thought. I’m in super deep contrast lately and its especially intense since I sold my childhood home. Intense and deep grief has a life of its own. It often takes over your whole life and you just hang on for the ride. Lots of crying and anxiety and physical stuff too. It can affect people in many somatic and emotional ways. I now allow the feelings and honour myself for how well I’ve done and continue to do. Even though its super rough right now, trusting the grief process means trusting and letting go of resistance, because I trust in the wisdom of my body to know how to heal. I know things are getting better as I heal and move forward, but my counselor validating that the grief process really works, when you allow it, has been very helpful for me. Instead of me wanting it all to be better right now (well, I still do), at least I honour myself more now and the wisdom of what I’m going through. Me being where I am right now is worthy of my love and appreciation because I am the very best version of myself that I can possibly be right now. You can’t LOA your way out of grief, I’ve now found out. I’ve learned to love and accept the process, whilst still focusing on the positives whenever I can. By the way, I manifested a trip to Maui with LOA. I wanted to go so badly, but had no money to go. So, I went on tripadvisor everyday and pretended I was going, and research my whole trip and asked questions as if I was going. I knew every thing about every hotel and every beach! I then entered this contest that had many thousands of entries over the entire country, and only one winner. A trip to Maui. And
    I won it.! I know this stuff works.

  • Anna BoBana says:

    I once made what I felt the perfect card for my brother. My sentiment was honest and sincere:
    “I wish you all the love, understanding and growth of a near-death experience.”
    Never sent the card.
    A year or so later he called me. I couldn’t remember the last time that happened, 20? 30 years?
    He called (OMG) to apologize to me (OMG!) for times going all the way back to when I was a baby swaddled in a blanket (his words, hand to GUS).
    He’d gone through the Landmark course/program and was apparently taken through exactly what I’d wished upon him. Go figure!
    I am reminded that contrast is my friend, and I see it in conjunction with momentum (for every action there is an equal but opposite reaction). SO, as bad as it may look, feel & seem – I know it’s going to be at least that GOOD in feeling as quickly as the contrast came on.
    In some times of contrast (house/car broken into, things stolen, damaged, job loss, kid kicked out of after school care) I’ve been able to giggle with delight at what’s to come – not always in front of others, but definitely on my own at home!
    Now I want to sing, “Contrast is Good! Contrast is FUN! Contrast is great for Everyone!”

  • The pile of poop with the heart made me belly laugh right out loud, like AHAHAHAHA. I love this post and I’m glad I’m not the only one with high boots on!

  • JG. says:

    I guess I may add that contrast -which does not have to be crappy in itself- could be seen as cholesterol: there is a good and a bad kind. The bad kind y crappy, unpleasant. The good one does only highlight differences, not necesarily in an unpleasant way.
    So, back to the surfer analogy. Surfers, when riding waves do NEVER go against them: the go forward or, in any case, sideways -in what may be seen as a stationary state. So, maybe crappy contrast is an effort to go back to a previous place, while “positive contrast” would always move forward (and, really, Is there any other direction?)…

  • JG. says:

    Contrast: would I welcome it and wish it on my best friends and family?
    Definitively not!
    I have been giving some thought to the comments on contrast of lately, and my take so far is this: if LOA states that we attract what we vibrate (and I have some nuances to this, in that I believe vibration is the fuel but thought directs it, and that is why we may be experiencing crappy but strong vibrations and from them attract wonderful stuff), then all this appreciation of contrast, doesn’t attact it?
    So, I say, stop making contrast so “desirable”. Or, if it is unavoidable, why not make it a “one direction street” that runs from good, to better to even better?…
    Still, I get the point that, when something not so enjoyable has already set in, you must get the best out of it, and, above all, not push against it. Ride it like surfers ride waves. And that is where my idea that I can milk it’s energy and redirect it through my thoughts, comes handy.

  • Melissa H says:

    Ha I have to agree with this.
    I have been singing the contrast tune for about two years now. But I must admit I am so happy to be singing it. I have become so much more relaxed and to be honest it excites me now to know exactly where I’m vibing. Because I allow myself to explore it get my hands all dirty in it ( contrast that is) and what always comes as a surprise is this realization like I thought that? Or I felt this way? Well oh I’m glad I know now. I wasn’t always this way. Imagine a two year old at a grocery store being told they can’t get the candy. That use to be me now I’m more calm and choose a better feeling thought.
    I was recently shown that I felt guilt in areas of my life. And this could be the kink to my link to the vortex. I have been flying high with awareness until this morning. I have a call with a generous coach in an hour and guilt from other areas of my life surfaced. But here’s the amazing part I didn’t get MAD! I got happy because I thought OMG I had no idea this is so good to know. So I get what your saying Jeanette 100%. I feel for me contrast is an opportunity for more self awareness and love. We need the reminders some times.

  • Jeannette,
    Your perspective is funny, honest and eye-opening as always. “It’s my contrast and I’ll cry if I want to”. Grrrrrl!
    I like what you said about most of the contrast being in the rear-view mirror. That’s when we can see all the good it brought us.
    When you first get an unexpected contrast, it would be weird to welcome it. That’s just not human! But after a while, you see how much it allowed you to create growth and new opportunities for yourself.
    I have no problem in breaking my “not listening to complainers” rule when someone is swiped with something out of the blue. My sympathy can help that person adjust and as part of my reality is to be a healer and lover of humanity, this is great.
    But if that person continues to gripe and complain, even after they’ve been baby stepping their way through (which is a great way to approach any new area of life) and had some small successes and you can start to see the benefit, then I won’t listen to them anymore and then I will point out how they drew it into their life etc. Ha!
    I even do this to myself though it hurts! I visualize a soulmate all the time (a Scorpio can’t really have any other kind of love). But I’m also honest with myself as to why it might be taking a while: control issues, desire to raise my children completely by myself (MY babies!). Then I can do better visualizations of a soul mate who will let me lead when it comes to raising children and how I spend my money and and and….!

  • This is the best post to read today! A coworker gave me a “this is your job” and “I don’t have time” after a day of me interrupting my work to help her with a problem. I was absolutely stunned, because (1) I knew I’d be called into a meeting if I had that atttitude towards a colleague and (2) our boss thinks it’s cute when she behaves this way.
    As I left the building and headed towards the train, I kept thinking “This is why I want my own business.” I’ve been thinking about how my day will be – people happily helping each other, because we’re surrounded by dogs, who doesn’t love dogs?
    And then I set on the train, boot up, and see this blog post that I opened this morning (on my way to work) but didn’t get a chance to read.
    Love it!
    I’ve gone from being disappointed about an experience to being thankful and appreciative. Thankful that I have clarity on what I want to see in my career and appreciative for my coworker being consistent in her behavior so that I could gain that clarity.

  • Ming says:

    Yep. Gotta love the contrast. May not be loving it in the thick of it. But definitely part of the journey. My favorite, rich people’s problems. That one cracks me up. You do too Jeannette. Big love.

  • Elle says:

    I absolutely loved, loved the story on your podcast about your friend who lost it all, had to do community service and it led him to the life of his dreams!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I had tears in my eyes too!
    OMG, talk about making lemonade out of lemons!!!! Sometimes, that kick is needed!
    Here’s to more success stories!

  • Todd says:

    My apologies for the typos

  • Todd says:

    I can relate to a contrasting environment you speak. This summer I’ve had two surgeries with 3 months…a right shoulder rotator cuff surgery, and right side inguinal hernia surgery and both cut into my beach going, wave jumping expectations for the warm weather season. I decided to take it all in stride, and as a result, I only suffered physical.
    Asking why oh why, or why God why dis this happen to me, only torments you emotionally, and creates a negative energy environment of which you wish positive things (healing) to happen within and that’s a contrasting contradiction of the likes that isn’t ideal creating an ideal physical healing environment.
    Jeannette, I feel your contrast, and it’s great to know that are potentially many, many summer to enjoy, and until then ski lodges have hottubs for which to don the bikini…or not.
    May your Good Vibes create a tidal wave of joy in the wake of your challenges….you deserve it!
    Thanks for all you do 🙂

  • Leslie says:

    My summer has been a “knee deep in s*&t” kind of season as well. This blog post pretty much sums up what I’ve “mostly” told myself all summer — Wow, what’s coming is going to be fabulous! I agree with Jacqui that some of the more difficult contrast is harder to manage — I had some of that too. I told myself then that it was perfectly okay to cry and feel sad.
    Thanks for this one Jeannette. 🙂

  • Janette says:

    My amazing fun adventure that I’m living right now began as truly crapola mega-contrast. Lucky for me I had you to remind me to milk it BEFORE trying to change it.
    So I get it. And next time you need someone to tell you to milk it, you know where to find me 🙂

  • Paige says:

    This is FABULOUS, Jeannette! I have had the most contrast filled summer as well! It is so funny as I am working on creating something different the “contrast” piece did not even come into view. I am so grateful I read this blog. I have thought a million times “I need to change my thoughts around this” but never grasped the contrast until now. Thank you-thank you-thank you

  • Jacqui says:

    Love this topic Jeannette, and just heard your podcast too 🙂
    What I notice is that I’m happy to embrace contrast when I grade it as at the lower end of the scale (disappointment, or an argument) and when it’s been at the higher end of the scale (someone died or got sick) I find it much more difficult. Having a firmly rooted belief system that everything is working out for us has helped me, at times of deepest contrast, when I’m being at my most messy-human-ness and can’t easily reach for that perspective. Thanks for the expansion that’s here in this post!

    • Jeannette says:

      I know what you mean, Jacqui.
      And I’m still wondering whether it would be helpful or not to have someone celebrate my bad times instead of try to coach me out of them – but I suspect I’ll get to find out after writing this. lol
      Thanks for reading and for commenting. 🙂

  • Nikky says:

    Awww I feel so much love for you Jeannette and this time it’s because you are so funny. You make me laugh !!!
    True about the contrast. Who said, don’t know who said it but I heard it somewhere. Contrast is our content as coaches that will help in our spiritual and business expansion. So I welcome contrast knowing that it will help me get clear and when I am out of it , I can write about it …. Lol … 🙂

    • Jeannette says:

      That’s a great quote, Nikky! When we can really remember that, I think it transforms our experience of the situation!
      Thanks for posting it here, and for launching the conversation. 🙂

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